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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Boss telling me my mouth smells

86 replies

SugarnetMum · 10/05/2017 20:33

I brush my teeth every morning before work obviously, shower etc. My boss has told me twice in the last two weeks while pointing at his mouth that there is a smell from my "mouth" no one else has ever told me this including my boyfriend who I'm with every minute of the day! Or mother etc
I've now resorted to being paranoid constantly smelling my breath and bringing chewing gum.. Aibu to think he's just a dickhead? Trying to put me down?

He usually only says it if I'm correcting him on something regarding work....

Although hes pretty straight forward and tells me to tell him if there's ever something on his face or a smell..

:S I feel horrible and smelly even though I'm always clean..

OP posts:
BossyBitch · 10/05/2017 21:05

How very odd!

Could he be speaking metaphorically? As in 'smelling' meaning that he feels disturbed by what you're saying (going by what you said about context)?

Do you have a good enough friend to ask directly?

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 10/05/2017 21:07

I can't imagine the conversation your boss had with you when he asked you to "tell him if there's anything on his face or a smell coming from him" Confused

Is he obsessed with bodily odours? What an odd thing to say.
Does he want you to alert him if you suspect he's farted during a meeting?

TheLegendOfBeans · 10/05/2017 21:09

What is it that you do? If it's something like dentistry then maybe but if it's an office job....hmmmm

I had a former manager do something super similar to me and it made me so paranoid I could barely speak. There was absolutely nothing wrong with me.

I now know that it was a shit trick by him to grind my already shattered professional confidence to the next level by undermining me personally.

Want to know what I'd do? Tip off your HR department. Then ask him to explain himself one on one in private.

Peanutbutterrules · 10/05/2017 21:10

You're breath is fine - your boss not so much!

Just smile sweetly - shake her head in a bemused way and carry on correcting him! Or point to yourself, smile and do the OK sign.

He's being a dick.

Italiangreyhound · 10/05/2017 21:12

Stand as far from him as possible when talking to him, if he does it again just smile and say "No, I think my breath is fine."

Just don't engage.

I am a bit rude and I might say, "I've noticed you always mention my breath when we are discussing things and you appear feel uncomfortable about what I am saying." But I am not recommending that.

Hissy · 10/05/2017 21:26

Do you floss? Do you attend regular dentist and Hygienist appointments?

Are you hydrated? Stomach issues?

Any one of these can cause breath issues, usually easily resolved

Have you actually asked the guy what he's actually talking about?

If he's being anything less than sensitive, then he's out of order

321zerobaby · 10/05/2017 21:44

Do you drink coffee? i'm not a coffee drinker and find the smell of it on peoples breath afterwards pretty rank.

I'm sure your breath is fine and your boss is just being a dick. I did notice my husband breath was a bit off recently, a course of probiotics form the health food shop (Probio 7) and it was back to normal.

hoddtastic · 10/05/2017 21:44

i have 2 friends with HONKING bad breath, if they asked me i'd tell them. I think i would ask him if he's trying to tip you off about dental hygiene or is he trying to say you're talking shit as you've noticed the times he says it is when he's being put on the spot.

LumpySpaceCow · 10/05/2017 21:48

Is he basically saying that you are talking shite? If so, I'd maybe suggest that his nose was too close to his arse!

BarbarianMum · 10/05/2017 21:49

I agree that you should ask him straight what he's trying to stay or ask your dentist. Ive had to speak to people I line manage about similar issues before- its excruciatingly embarrassing and they are always unaware.

Original poster
SugarnetMum · 10/05/2017 21:52

No no no... I'm Irish and would totally get the "you're talking shite" crap... He's foreign and says things in a different context. But be genuinely means there's a smell coming from my mouth...

Sorry only seen all these replies now. We get on in general yeah to an extent, we don't argue, he doesn't dislike me. Then again he treats all his female employees the same..

OP posts:
Original poster
SugarnetMum · 10/05/2017 21:56

I haven't been to the dentist in years...
No one has ever mentioned it to me..and my mother or boyfriend would have..

Yes I drink coffee But hadn't at the times he said it. And am only young so wouldn't have years stained coffee breath teeth etc...

I just feel like he says it to me to put me down when I think I'm right about something , kind of like he feels he's above me... Here is an example of conversation the other day..

Me and him chatting normally while other employee is in room.

He says "remember what I said yo you the other day?"

Me: oh yeah about x y z ? (Different topic)

Him: no not that,

Me : oh about A b c ( another topic)

Him: no. Not that, points to mouth

Me: embarrassed but wanting to speak up for myself this time " well good thing I have chewing gum now so"

Where as the first time he said it I was genuinely shocked and was like oh shit really? I wonder what that's from, I brushed my teeth etc

OP posts:
BerylStreep · 10/05/2017 21:56

I'd go to the dentist and ask.

Do you eat a lot of strong smelling food?

Perhaps it is just your boss being a dick, but I would personally prefer to know.

I remember managing a guy years ago who had the most horrendous breath. There were numerous complaints in the office about him.

BerylStreep · 10/05/2017 21:57

You haven't been in years? Shock I thought everyone went every 6 months.

Original poster
SugarnetMum · 10/05/2017 21:58

Its only a small food business he runs to give more context.

OP posts:
Original poster
SugarnetMum · 10/05/2017 21:59

Yeah I hate the dentist and haven't been since the end of secondary school.. I'm only in early college but still..

OP posts:
SuperPug · 10/05/2017 22:03

What a pathetic little man...
If it was a significant problem, I'm sure someone else, especially your boyfriend, would have told you. If it's a "talking shit" signal, just as bad and massively undermining.
I cannot stand people like this. Speak to him about this, without getting emotional about it and if he's still being an idiot, there's nothing to stop you reporting him.

UnicornSparkles1 · 10/05/2017 22:04

He sounds like a dickhead.

I'd look for another job.

Gingerbreadmam · 10/05/2017 22:05

i would visit the dentist. bad teeth give a very distinct smell. i would bet you need a filling. nothing really takes the smell away.

Birdsbeesandtrees · 10/05/2017 22:05

If you haven't been to the dentist in that long there might actually be a problem.

DJBaggySmalls · 10/05/2017 22:06

Complain to HR, his behaviour isnt appropriate.

roundaboutthetown · 10/05/2017 22:10

You should go to the dentist.
That said, his comments are inappropriate.

millifiori · 10/05/2017 22:10

That's a very weird way to behave. But there's a chance your breath smells different to him if he's from a different culture. I have Middle Eastern and African friends who admit Westerners smell really cheesy to them, because of the amount of dairy we eat. He could be sensitive to that, maybe? And ime, people on the low carb diet have really bitter breath. Also, a friend used to drop heavy 'hints' to me about my breath a few years ago, when I was on a medication that had a side effect of bad breath.
Go for a dental check up anyway, to rule out infection.

NotTheMrMenAgain · 10/05/2017 22:11

Tonsil stones? They stink and some people don't realise they've got them until they have a look/poke about.

HateSummer · 10/05/2017 22:13

How are your gums? Rotting gums can cause smell.
Do you eat drink water throughout the day? Dry mouth can be smelly too.