To shit on all their pillows?

[Shoveyourshittystickupyourarse]

Just cleaned the bathroom. Went to clean the toilet at the end and found the bog brush caked in dried shit. Completely caked, not just a bit grimy. The holder covered too.

I'm fucking fuming. DCs are all adults - 19+ (except the baby & it clearly wasn't him), DP is obviously an adult too. I'm a SAHM so I clean the bathroom, so they knew they were leaving it for me.

It is so fucking disrespectful, I am actually in tears here.

I don't even know what my aibu is because I can't see how I'm nbu to be so angry.

It is disrespectful. It's the 'I don't care that I'm making things harder/dirtier/more difficult for you' that really irks be too. Particularly when they know the aftermath isn't going to be their problem.

We use the disposable ones too. I really hope they don't discontinue them. Normal toilet brushes aren't really suitable for us.

Well your way forward is clear. If its not that big a deal then he can do it cant he? Tell him that from now on the job is his and it needs doing (however many) times a week. Smile and refuse to discuss it further, other than perhaps to say "But you said it wasnt a big deal so you wont mind doing it will you? Why are you over reacting like this?"

If your DP doesn't see why you're angry, he can clean the fucking loo while you stand over him for the next month.

Oh yes - a complete hissy fit is called for.

DP may well be the culprit -or he may not- but he doesnt have your back anyway so he needs to be shown how serious this is.

Disrespectful ,dirty and disgusting - gather the family together and let rip.

It was him.

How often does he clean the bathrooms?

I'm completely at a loss as to how the handle got dirty?

I would yell like a banshee over this and, yes, go out for the whole day.

I would put good money on your DP being the culprit. Lots of good money.

Yanbu. Though, I'd get rid of the bog brush....harbinger of germs!

I get this, as a sahm. I expect to be able to "freshen the loos with a detox wipe thing, a good dollop of Domestos and a squirt of Toilet Duck. I don't expect to have to use my thump nail (wrapped up in the wipes) to chisel off dried shit.

Try leaving it. They'll quickly get the idea

other toilet cleaning brands are available.

Throw the brush away and buy another. I replace ours on a fairly regular basis anyway

My hissy fit is the overreaction, apparently. She agreed that it shouldn't be left like that but doesn't see why I am shouting and crying. Said 'how do you know it was left for you?' Because, you fucking numbnut, I clean the fucking bathroom.

The thing with going on strike is, I still want things to be clean for the baby, so I'd still have to do the bulk of the cleaning anyway.

I haven't made a rota of cleaning because they all work and/or study so I felt that as long as they cleared away behind them I'd do the main cleaning jobs. They do their own washing and rooms (or not, but as long as they shut their doors that's not my problem). They make their own lunch and breakfasts but I'm constantly nagging them to clear up after them. I had strong words a few weeks ago but it always slides back.

I can't tell them to clean up or leave, because they're step children and dp wouldn't agree to that.

I am putting a fucking cleaning rota on the wall though, and I am the only one who can change the wifi password so I suppose that's the punishment I can wield. I just shouldn't have to police other adults like this. None of them can afford to move out any time soon and I feel fucking depressed at the thought of living like this for God knows how long.

DP is being a little nicer, but only in the way like if she hugs me I might feel better, not like she actually gets why I'm so upset.

Eleanor they won't get the idea. Once I was pissed off and left the toilet for 3 weeks. Grim, I know, I lined the seat with paper to use it. Just in protest. Not one fucker thought to shove some bleach down it in all that time.

They all know how to do cleaning as they all had chores growing up, I shouldn't have let it slide for so long so the chores rota will be back ASAP.

It worked and now I get asked if there's any help I need

It is not fucking helping you - it is clearing up their own fucking house.

Fuck sake.

There are people out there who think that bog brushes are for removing shit after using the toilet when they are not.

There are people who will use them to break up a giant log or unblock a toilet when they are not there for that.

I had to train my lot to leave my fucking toilet brushes alone. If you have a shit, flush it away and squirt toilet duck around the pan then leave. It's not hard to grasp.

Then I'll get a visitor who thinks they are being good by using my toilet brush to remove skids. Leave it the fuck alone

Family meeting OP before you really do shit on their pillows

Is there a chance that any of them have had friends in while you've been out who may have used the loo?

Maybe they've (DC's or friends) had a shit so big it was un-flushable (c'mon we've all been there) and blocked the loo so they tried to solve their embarrassment by using the brush to shift it? It is a possibility since you say it's normally you that cleans the bathroom so if its unusual for them to do it why would they try on this occasion?

Definitely not BU to be pissed at this behaviour. So disrespectful.

Chase them all round brandishing the dirty brush until they meet your demands to club together and buy a Loogun. I was a bit doubtful at first but DH, who loves a gadget got one and it's great. He even used it just now to get something he and DS trod in at the park off both their shoes and the pushchair wheels.

I hate the attitude that it doesn't matter if you make a mess because someone else will clean up after you. It IS disrespectful, and I'm not surprised you're angry, OP.

Mind you, I also hate loo brushes. They're nasty filthy things. I have my eye on one of these, as I'm told they're really effective.

www.loogun.com/

Snap!

For sure have a word with them. But "fuming" and "being in tears" does seem a massively disproportionate reaction.

Build a tiny shed at the far, far end of the garden. Nail a plank of wood with a hole in it to use as a seat. Put a pail in it. Supply a few rolls of nasty shiny white toilet paper. Bury a dog loo in the corner of said shed to dispose of their doings. Banish all culprits to this shed forever.

Put a combination lock on the house loo and make it your own.

My ex used to do this, home and away. Especially away. Because that was the 'cleaner's job'. Disrespectful twat.

gamerchick oh ! Are toilet brushes not for skiddies !?! Jesus I am been doing it wrong my whole life. But i do clean the brush after if that makes sense.. spray with cleaning spray and rinse under the flushing water as toilet flushes

What should one dp if ones leaves a massive skiddie in a host's toilet? Just leave it?

If one leaves a massive log that needs breaking up? Just leAve it? Fish it out with bate hands? Then what?!

I am not a poo troll honest.. just a bit about the role of the toilet brush

OP that's not cool.. they should have rinsed to poo off the brush as described above or if they panicked at least let you know "mum/partner sorry m8 I caked the brush in poop.. what should I do?!" Haha

I have nothing to add except my outrage and my love of your user name

Go for it Ontherise! You won't regret it. We did realise we needed to let guests know about it though as it's not obvious what it is as otherwise I don't know what they'd do if they made a mess.

Well your way forward is clear. If its not that big a deal then he can do it cant he?

This. The one thing that drives the fear of God in to DP is when he tries to offload bedtime onto me and I say yes, that would be lovely, I'd be very happy to swap doing bedtime for doing the packed lunches. He back pedals pretty damn fast and suddenly it's not such a chore to put to (really quite easy) children to bed on time.

My personal rule is if it's my skid and above the waterline, a wodge of loo paper then a squirt of bleach. If it's below the waterline, just the bleach as it will wash off. Mind you, I live on my own. Not sure how I'd feel about other people's skidmarks.