Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Original poster

Keep Your Mutt On A Frigging Lead

209 replies

Psolomon · 06/05/2017 23:04

Out running canalside this morning and an unleashed dog came bounding up, tongue lolling maniacally, and jumped up at me, frenziedly snuffling at my sweaty snatch whilst I frantically tried to side-step its mangy mass. I thundered at its owner: 'Get this thing off me!' and hurled a couple of panicky expletives (I'm not a lover of dogs and to have one jump up whilst running was scary).

AIBU to think far too many dog owners think the world ought to love their mutt? Surely a dog should be controlled on a canal towpath? Grr.

OP posts:

Original poster

Psolomon · 07/05/2017 10:20

Yes, steaming dog shit. Don't get me started on that...

Or people who take their dogs to town centres. One word: why?

This thread clearly demonstrates the two-camp demo of dog-walkers: there are thick, socially inept and entitled wankers walkers who couldn't give a rancid pile of their hound's steaming faeces about other human beings, and then there are emotionally intelligent, lovely walkers who understand that dogs do not take precedence over humans.

OP posts:

Original poster

Psolomon · 07/05/2017 10:25

So if the dog of one of these selfish couples comes over and starts licking my crotch, am I permitted to jump the male of the couple and suck him off? I'm happy to put the woman's mind at rest by intermittently coming up for air and declaring in breathy tones: "In just being friendly!"

OP posts:

CombineBananaFister · 07/05/2017 10:44

Not wanting a dog jumping up and licking you, doesn't necessarily make you a dog hater surely?
I have often been tempted to tell DS to go and lick the lady back who's dog bounded over and was 'just being friendly' to us. It's the look of genuine horror and incomprehension on the the owners face that does it for me when you ask them to remove their dog. Like how can you NOT possibly love it? and they take genuine offence too.
Am starting to lose track of the amount of cafes we've had to leave and buses/trains we've had to get off lately because Ds has a severe allergy to them - places I thought he'd be okay (and would be if they were controlled) It would seem that they are becoming a priority over humans as we are becoming increasingly dogfriendly
FWIW, it's not just entitled dog owners - there's a huge chunk of people that just don't respect other peoples space/noise levels. Parents who think everyone should love their child, adults who think you should listen to their phone call/ipad movie.
I need to get me a house in the middle of nowhere

Beerwench · 07/05/2017 10:54

Reading about the picnic invasions reminded me of my pony dropping me on my arse a few years ago spooking at a feathered ninja pheasant and proceeding to gatecrash a picnic in the same field, well teenagers with pop, crisps and sweets, he trotted straight over and frisked them all for contraband before I managed to hobble closer, they thought it was hilarious, held him till I got there and helped me back on. He now is intrigued by carrier bags and would frisk anyone with one if I let him!

wibblywobblyfish · 07/05/2017 10:58

I think public footpaths are for everybody to use aren't they? I get a bit fed up of having to jump out the way for runners and cyclists when I'm walking my mutt.

itsmine · 07/05/2017 11:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

madmare77 · 07/05/2017 11:04

I'm always wary of people who don't like dogs...

ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 07/05/2017 11:07

I'd agree with your point if your writing style, choice of language and answers to everyone suggesting anything remotely contrary to your own idea weren't a) like you've been on some cheapo creative writing weekend learning new adjectives and now think you are JKR and b) think you're the dog's bollocks yourself.
Fnar.

ForalltheSaints · 07/05/2017 11:12

An unleashed dog that could end up in the canal is unreasonable to all, dog owner and others alike. I don't blame the dog though.

Soubriquet · 07/05/2017 11:22

I actually like the response of the OP

I love sarcasm and I think she has a valid point

And I have a little pup on my lap as I type this so I clearly am a dog lover

People are precious about their dogs me too but a dog is never more important than a person.

If my dog ever becomes reliable off lead, she will be let off in areas that are safe, and called back to heel when people and other dogs are around

If she's not reliable she won't go off lead. It's that simple

straighttalker · 07/05/2017 11:33

OP, let me reassure you - I had no thoughts of any dog mutilating your snatch or your drowning in the canal. Merely a little push, and a soaking, while the rest of the world went about their business. In fact, the overemphasis on your genitals in your original post, and your ongoing preoccupation with it in your replies, form some part of the instinctive distaste this thread arouses.

And since you brought him up, not a fan of Bret Easton Ellis, but there's a man who understands the human capacity for inhumanity. I actually think I might have actually read a short story at some point where the owners of a dog shelter named the dogs for masculine icons - Easton Ellis, Dante - as a comment on the needless cruelty of men.

You have an exaggerated idea of your own importance. My dog is indeed much more important to me than you. This is likely the case for most dog owners. But really, this was hardly an event that merits an AIBU stretching to 6 pages on mumsnet, never mind the wholesale condemnation of dogs and dog-owners.

Costacoffeeplease · 07/05/2017 11:35

I think the op thinks she's all amusing and witty - 1/10 for effort but 10/10 for getting all the dog-hating frothers out, once again, well done

CheeseQueen · 07/05/2017 11:52

Also please don't confuse dogs who are over friendly, excitable with aggression

I absolutely cannot stand it when dogs jump up at me. I don't give a shit if they're excitable, or "just being friendly." I'd class it the same as aggression as it's definitely intimidating.
They can't just be allowed to jump up at people. Know how to keep them under control or don't have one.

Coverup890 · 07/05/2017 11:55

I love dogs but dont agree with them being off the lead if they cant be recalled. As with everything there are good and bad owners. I cant see it as being any different to parents who insist their toddler is cute while they run round restaurants pissing everybody off. Why cant they understand that not everybody likes them?

My dd is very nervous of dogs lately as on her walk to school a dag on a long lead ran up to her the guy walking said it was friendly. With that the dog grabbed her arm and wouldnt let go until she hit it. The dog owner then carried on walking saying "aw did he get you?" She still loves dogs but is so warey of them now.

YouTheCat · 07/05/2017 12:01

My ds is at the profound end of the autistic spectrum. He's terrified of dogs. His carers took him for a nice walk a few years ago when a dog came bounding over (no owners in sight) which resulted in a meltdown so massive that the carers had to call for police assistance to get ds back to the minibus.

Some people are just twats.

Ifailed · 07/05/2017 13:35

10/10 for getting all the dog-hating frothers out, once again
Where has anyone posted any frothy dog-hate?

Willow2017 · 07/05/2017 13:41

Yet again I am confounded by the number of people who think its ok to let their dog run up to someone and jump on them.

When I am out I dont want me nor my kids being slobbered over, having muddy paw prints all over their clothes or worse still raked with their damm claws. Never mind having to decide if its 'friendly' or not.

My eldest was terrified of dogs for years after we were out and a puppy (as big as he was) was allowed to jump on him repeatedly raking him with its claws. He would run blindly if a dog approached him, I could never relax when out with him until he finally got over it after a relative got a dog who they took the time and effort to train it.

I love dogs, would have one if I could but I do not love your dog enough to let it assault me or my kids.

If you cannot control your dog then you will have to accept that I will do anything I can to get rid of it and if that includes using a lump of driftwood to fight it off then I bloody well will.

I love the fact that farmers have the law on their side and can shoot any dog in their fields near their animals but humans are expected to just put up with being assaulted/attacked by dogs and do nothing. (btw I am in full support of farmers, what dogs do to livestock is horrifying)

Put it on a lead if you cant control it. Its not rocket science.

Original poster

Psolomon · 07/05/2017 13:42

You're right about twats. They're blinking everywhere. Especially on canal towpaths.

Do people really take their mutts on trains? What happens if it needs to evacuate its bowels (see? I could have said 'shit' there but I chose to exhibit my exemplary and superior lexical skills instead. Like EL James)?

OP posts:

Soubriquet · 07/05/2017 13:46

Dogs really do go on trains.

I've taken one of mine on the bus in the past.

The usual rules are no dogs on seats and you get fined a cleaning bill if the dog toilets

AwaywiththePixies27 · 07/05/2017 13:46

I think you are a bit pathetic, in fact I think people who are scared of dogs are utterly pathetic, they have just has much a right to be out and about as you

Really? Pathetic? So some uptight arse who had zero recall on his dog who made years of hard work with DS vanish within seconds is what exactly? Just misunderstood? . My autistic son is now petrified of dogs because of that one incident, is he 'pathetic' too? .

AwaywiththePixies27 · 07/05/2017 13:49

I think everytime a dog jumps up and licks you unwarranted the recipient should give the owners the same treatment. Jump really high. Lick their faces at least five times and then say "sorry I'm just being friendly". Afraid the irony will still be lost on them though. Most of the dogwalkers I encounter always tell their pets not to jump and that's without being asked to do so.

Original poster

Psolomon · 07/05/2017 13:50

..and how dare you insist I have a predilection for discussing genitalia! That would make me a dick, and I certainly haven't time to fanny about with words that simply get my readers into a flap. I cunt think of anything worse, to be honest. This hole discussion is supposed to be about pricks, their lack of foreskinthought and their unleashed dogs. If another one jumps up at my snatch then read my lips: it's beef curtains for the twats.

OP posts:

Original poster

Psolomon · 07/05/2017 13:51

Strike-through fail.

OP posts:

swimlyn · 07/05/2017 13:53

Straighttalker
FFS. Again. I just love these threads and the dog-hating hysteria they stir up.

Hmm… I see straight talking summaries of the various problems people have experienced with free-running dogs, not hysteria.

You have an exaggerated idea of your own importance.
IPMSL!

From the many helpful explanations here, I will explain to my friend who had his groin bitten and his scrotum punctured (needing stitches) that he is just ‘being pathetic’ and obviously just a dog hater.

…utterly obtuse and thick dog lovers…
Sums it all up really…

If you are an owner, simply take responsibility for your dog instead of making pitiful excuses.

Original poster

Psolomon · 07/05/2017 13:54

Pixie, in the hierarchy of victimhood your autistic son comes below the rights of dogs. Perhaps dogs are the noo minority. Or dog walkers. Yes, dog walkers.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9