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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel that Great Britain isn't 'Great' anymore? I think I want to move abroad!

299 replies

Whatawaytomakealiving · 06/05/2017 21:55

I don't want to live in a country that treats people as it does. I work damned hard to serve the public, but I am so disillusioned.

OP posts:
Westray · 07/05/2017 08:46

Obviously not edinburgh.

Yes Edinburgh.

I can be in Princes Street in 20 minutes.

JacquesHammer · 07/05/2017 08:49

So many replies on this thread totally validated OP's point.

I am with you OP. I am - quite frankly - embarrassed to be british

LaPharisienne · 07/05/2017 08:50

YANBU. We left after Brexit, which was the final straw for us. Plenty of places are much better than the UK.

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 07/05/2017 08:59

15 mins from Edinburgh though? Yes cheaper. Are you in Edinburgh council area? That seems the overpriced part. We are tied with school or would do same as you like a shot.

Westray · 07/05/2017 09:01

I am 20 minutes from Princes Street.

alwayslearning789 · 07/05/2017 09:03

"Like most countries it depends who you are, how well off you are and if you fit in" Chazs you have it spot on.

And Uppity has echoed this from a very relevant and real experience, evidence that fundamentally the above statement rings true whenever moving to a different place.

Make sure you do your research thoroughly OP, whatever you decide to do.

sonlypuppyfat · 07/05/2017 09:07

You say this country has changed well yes it has its completely different to the one I grew up in, I wonder why that is!!!!!!!!!!

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 07/05/2017 09:26

Westray i am not doubting you. No need to be defensive

I was asking if you were in the Edinburgh council area or a different one, as its the council which has overpriced housing.

I am aware it's possible to live much more cheaply outside city and travel in and I wish we could but are tied with DD's special school.

Alternatively if you have found a house like that within edinburgh council boundaries do please share where so we can buy one Grin.

Brokenbiscuit · 07/05/2017 09:27

Until you've lived in another country you won't appreciate what you have in the UK. So go! You'll soon come back with your tail between your legs.

This is a silly comment. Lots of people move overseas and settle very happily in their new countries, so it certainly isn't a foregone conclusion that the OP would come back with her tail between her legs.

DH and I have lived in several countries between us. Like the UK, they all had their pros and cons. DH would probably rank the UK third out of the four places he has lived in, and he would leave tomorrow if I didn't want to stay close to my ageing parents. In terms of overall lifestyle, I agree with him that it was better where we used to live. However, family is the most important thing for me, and so we'll be staying in the UK for the time being. We may well move again when we're older though!

Westray · 07/05/2017 09:32

monkey- not being defensive, and no not within the city boundary, but on a new train route.

I am not sure what type of school your DD needs but we have a brilliant school for kids with additional support needs locally.

HiggeldyPiggeldy · 07/05/2017 09:33

I have lived outside of the UK for over a decade now, came here with DH now a single parent and self employed, as with every country there are downsides, but the positives far outweigh the negatives. I always thought I would retire back to the UK but now I don't think I will

The things that I had always considered made the UK great are not there now.

I always thought the UK was tolerant of other cultures and welcoming but driving a "foreign" car when I visit now is an eye opener, the abuse I have received is sad and worrying.

The NHS is falling apart and will not continue in its present form, waiting weeks for appointments with GP's, months and in some cases years for hospitals it isoverstretched, underfunded and short staffed. The country I am in has insurance for health but as I am low income its free at the point of delivery. I have recently had an accident which needed hospital treatment, and means I am incapacitated, I have seen the specialist every fortnight for check ups and have been given help at home as I cant do certain things.

Housing is available and affordable, I live in a (rented) house that I could only dream of in the UK. I am in the process of buying a house

Education is excellent, although very academic based which does not suit all children. Childcare and nurseries are cheap and accessible to all,, sports clubs are cheap and readily available, school holiday clubs are cheap and have sensible hours for working parents. Universities are well funded, students do not leave with massive crippling debts, they receive housing benefit and other benefits to fund living.

There are a lot of free and cheap things to do, the benefits system is good, lots of red tape to get onto it but that I expect is the same in all countries.

I love the UK and always refer to it as "home" but now I see a divided, run down country, and worry very much about the future

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 07/05/2017 09:35

Westray good, didnt want to cause offence.

I know other schools are good, just DD is so settled and happy.

redexpat · 07/05/2017 09:39

I know what you mean about teaching. When I come back to the UK there is just this cloud of anxiety around children and child rearing. Its really difficult to articulate though.

Thingvellir · 07/05/2017 09:45

I've lived in several countries worked in a few more and my main takeaway is that absolutely nowhere is perfect!

Ultimately we came home to the UK and it was a relief to be home. We lived in London at first and I never felt fully comfortable there, now we've made our last move to the area where I grew up in and I feel very happy having cone full circle!

When you live abroad, if you dislike something, the attitude can be 'if you don't like it, go home' which made me feel helpless. You often don't have a vote as well, and your existence could be tied to your job and this is unsettling indeed.

I realise this doesn't answer the main issue of how the UK is changing, it does feel like it is, but as a citizen, you have the opportunity to shape where you live and get involved which is often not the case as an expat.

Disclaimer - a large chunk of my time away was in a ME dictatorship, not Aus, or a European country which definitely colours my views a lot as is a big part of my feelings of relief when we came home!

JacquesHammer · 07/05/2017 09:50

When you live abroad, if you dislike something, the attitude can be 'if you don't like it, go home'

You get the same thing here "if you don't like it, fuck off". I absolutely hate it

Orlantina · 07/05/2017 10:00

You get the same thing here "if you don't like it, fuck off". I absolutely hate it

Or. stop moaning. Get over it. You lost. It's so divisive - and the silence from our leaders to call this out speaks volumes

specialsubject · 07/05/2017 10:04

There are quite a few places that are good to live in, although nowhere is perfect.

Discounting the war zones, horrible climates, places ruled by religion ( and some countries are all three) there is still plenty of choice. Give it a go if you can get a visa, work and can support yourself. If you think you might return make sure you have a plan.

JacquesHammer · 07/05/2017 10:05

Or. stop moaning. Get over it. You lost. It's so divisive

Point proven. Aren't you a delight

JacquesHammer · 07/05/2017 10:06

Orlatina - massive apologies. Totally misunderstood your post. Sorry Blush

user1490465531 · 07/05/2017 10:12

I'd love to move but as a single parent I doubt I wold be brave enough to do it.
Rely to much in family support.
If I had a choice it would be Italy or Germany, Italy for the lifestyle and the culture and Germany because the country is well run and I feel would offer my daughter good opportunites.
Sadly UK has not much to offer the young anymore no chance to ever own a house and unstable healthcare system and in my opinion a poor quality of life compared to a lot of other countries.

Salzundessig · 07/05/2017 10:15

Move Op! You won't regret it! Working in international schools will save your love of teaching, too.

derxa · 07/05/2017 10:34

You say this country has changed well yes it has its completely different to the one I grew up in Yes it's massively different for me as well. I grew up in the 1960s and 1970s and the standard of living was much lower than now. It was grim for many people.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 07/05/2017 10:36

Britain has its faults but don't think it's the only country that has shifted to the right. It's far more widespread. Britain is more tolerant than its given credit for. If you are white Anglo-Saxon your experience of moving to another country can be very different to someone who isn't.

Fauchelevent · 07/05/2017 10:40

I want to live abroad. I think it'll be a great opportunity and really the UK doesn't completely suit me and what I want from my life right now so I'd like to consider somewhere else.

I am however charmed by the "fuck off then" attitude of anyone who complains about the UK.

DoorwayToNorway · 07/05/2017 11:05

I live abroad, I think some times people are a bit harsh on the UK. On the other hand my children and I are much happier where we are. DH isn't from the UK and was never that taken with it anyway.

I love visiting and most people here can't understand why we left. But on a recent trip back I was blown away by how rude and selfish people were. They look out for them and theirs and many people lack a little spark. It's like the beautify of life is lost and it's every man for himself. There seems to be a lot of misery and depression.
This was London though, so it might be different elsewhere. As the op works with the public I can quite see how and why these feelings bubbled up.