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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that leggings as school uniform is not 'lazy parenting'?

208 replies

NewStateswoman · 05/05/2017 10:55

Had a bit of a debate last night with a friend.

My DD wears black leggings to school. Her school isn't that strict about uniform; ties are optional, polo shirts are normal, etc. They do a daily mile run and lots of outdoors activities, and gym 3 times a week.

She's comfortable in leggings, they keep her warm, so that's what she wears (sometimes - she also has skirts and a summer dress).

But my friend was very scathing about the leggings! She says it's lazy parenting, to which I asked in which way I was a lazy parent for sending my daughter to school in comfortable clothes which adhere to the dress code.

She had no reply; essentially she just doesn't like leggings. It's sloppy, apparently, to let kids wear leggings, but other forms of black trousers are ok. I think she assumes it's to save me on ironing, maybe? Which it isn't.

So AIBU to let my daughter go to school in leggings?

OP posts:
Original poster
NewStateswoman · 05/05/2017 14:50

But Anti they're just blatantly not underwear, so that argument doesn't stack up at all. Using that logic, skinny jeans/jeggings are also no better than underwear. Tops are no better than vests.

OP posts:
allegretto · 05/05/2017 14:51

My DD wears mainly leggings or tracksuit trousers and they are very practical for primary school. (We don't have a uniform though!)

AntiGrinch · 05/05/2017 14:53

Of course there's a lot more to it: they cling specifically to the bottom, which in women is regarded as sexual; but we don't like to think of young girls being regarded sexually, so we don't come out and say it; so we think that the clingy-fabric-on-bottom thing is dangerously close to being sexual but - she's SIX! EURGH! so you get all this vague hand-wringing instead

With toddlers, their bottoms are safely non sexual and generally regarded as cute, so no one minds toddlers in leggings and t-shirts

AntiGrinch · 05/05/2017 14:55

"they're just blatantly not underwear,"

no no no! to the people who don't like them, they blatantly are underwear. That is the whole problem. If you see them trousers, and they see them as tights, then there is no "blatant" in it. Blatancy doesn't apply. you have either a child subtly wearing trousers, or a child subtly wearing underwear, and you and whole bunch of other people disagree which. It's really not blatant

AntiGrinch · 05/05/2017 14:57

Leggings are derived from dance wear, as were tights, which were originally designed for modern dance and gymnastics and only "suitable" in that context. Tights made it out into every day wear in the 60s because of mini skirts not really working with stockings. So as underwear. Leggings are having a more complicated solo career

Notso · 05/05/2017 15:01

Never considered what?

SheepyFun · 05/05/2017 15:04

I'm with you OP; I'm delighted that DD has got a place at a primary school without a uniform so she'll be able to wear leggings - she also has texture issues, and hates trousers with any structure (jogging bottoms are fine).

Incidentally, we looked at several primary schools for her, the majority of which do not have a uniform. We are in England. The only way I can see clothing making a difference to her learning is if it's uncomfortable in some way - which, ironically, many items of school uniform can be.

FrenchMartiniTime · 05/05/2017 15:11

Personally I'm not a fan of leggings and don't think they are appropriate for school.

If the school states that they are within the dress code fair enough.

Be prepared for a battle when she goes to secondary school and she has to wear proper trousers.

DistanceCall · 05/05/2017 15:41

I can't see how on earth that's lazy parenting. Presumably, if your daughter preferred trousers, you'd dress her in trousers.

Your friend must be one of those people who think that their opinions ARE reality - that is, if they think something is X (for them), then it must be X universally and objectively.

Ignore. Any maybe rethink the importance you attribute to your friend's views.

NuffSaidSam · 05/05/2017 15:47

I'm a nanny and one of the DC in my care at the moment is at a private secondary school, it's one of the best in the country. They don't have a uniform and many of the girls, my charge included, go to school every day in leggings, jeggings or jeans. And hoodies.

Year after year it churns out hundreds of kids with straight A* at GSCE and A-level, numerous extra-curricular achievements, places at Oxbridge and other top universities. These same children go on to great success in business and politics and all walks of life.

Amazingly, what they wear for school between 11-18 makes absolutely no difference to their success. They're able to understand that they shouldn't go to a job interview in the same clothes they wear for school! The ones who have gone on to become MD's and MP's and whatnot also don't seem to wear leggings and a hoody to work (although if they did, it wouldn't actually hinder their ability to their job because what you wear has no bearing on your abilities!).

SparklyUnicornPoo · 05/05/2017 15:49

If they are thick enough leggings so she's warm enough then I think it's fine.

My school has one day a week where the younger years wear own clothes for an activity, virtually all of the girls wear leggings, it is the one day each week where I don't have to help anyone to the loo because they cant do up/undo their trousers, or tell anyone to untuck their skirt from their tights/knickers, or have boys go 'I can see x's knickers', or have anyone whinge that their knees are cold. Comfortable children learn better and are happier on the playground.

AnnPerkins · 05/05/2017 16:04

Nobody needs to practice wearing uniform or officewear. I would argue that, given there are plenty of years where they might have to wear a uniform/collar and tie when they go out into the world of work, give children the opportunity not to while they can.

I work in an office and I'm wearing jeans and a casual shirt right now. It's ridiculous that my 7yo son has to wear a shirt and tie, polyester trousers and 'smart' shoes at school. He's the one who'll be running round a playground,falling over, kicking a ball etc at morning break and lunchtime. Wouldn't jeans or a tracksuit be more suitable?

And don't get me started on blazers with school badges on. What are they, trainee Alan Partridges?

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 05/05/2017 16:05

I've got no issue with decent quality leggings, particularly on children. They're comfortable, easy to wear and allow for a range of activity.

I've been for a run in my usual attire of leggings. I'm sure some passing white van man would draw it to my attention if he felt I was merely in undergarments Wink

I also don't wear leggings under trousers, shorts or skirts. (Although I have thermal long johns which definitely would reveal my choice of pants, but their fabric is different)

DontBeASalmon · 05/05/2017 16:23

d. The only way I can see clothing making a difference to her learning is if it's uncomfortable in some way

that is so not the point of a uniform.
I have been to schools with and schools without uniforms. I was lucky, my parents were wealthy, but I would still chose uniforms any day.

An0nymous · 05/05/2017 16:28

My DD's school is the one where the red tights under the blue cord dress are compulsory. Between Easter and the Autumn half term they wear the school summer dress. No tights allowed with this even if it's freezing as you're not allowed to mix winter and summer uniform.
So now they're not allowed to hang upside down on the climbing frame or do handstands unless it's a breaktime when they've got changed into their PE kit.

TheMysteriousJackelope · 05/05/2017 16:41

SaphireStrange DD is a teenager so the leggings are in adult sizes. She gets them from Amazon.com.

BeALert · 05/05/2017 16:52

At my daughter's school quite a few kids go to class in pyjama bottoms and a T-shirt.

It was recently listed as one of the best schools in the country. I guess lazy parenting works...

SapphireStrange · 05/05/2017 16:55

Thanks Jackelope!

Plunkette · 05/05/2017 17:00

An0n not really selling either the uniform, the learning environment or the school there. Grin

Don't I'm confused as to why you mention your parents wealth? Are making a connection between wealth and uniform? Most UK state schools wear a uniform and there are very expensive private schools who don't.

Gileswithachainsaw · 05/05/2017 17:13

anon

I would be truly disgusted by your school.

It sounds sexist to the extreme

DontBeASalmon · 05/05/2017 17:19

I'm confused as to why you mention your parents wealth?

because I never struggled to fit in. I was shopping in the right shops, without really thinking about it to be honest, but I was never left on the side because I didn't fit in with the "In crowd". I was never teased about my clothes, whilst some of my friends were.

All I meant is that life is much easier for a teen when there's a uniform. You complain loudly about it, of course, but I feel sorry for the ones with less money. It's not that fun.

In schools with a uniform I went to, the more second-hand, aged and ill fitted clothes the better. You used to stick like a sore thumb in a shiny new outfit. Go figure.

Just my own experience, I just prefer my kids to have a uniform, no fight no argument about what is acceptable for schools. It makes my life as a parent much easier.

Anonym0us · 05/05/2017 17:20

All the state primaries where we live (SW London) have uniforms. I have never seen kids going to school in leggings, so I'm surprised it does happen elsewhere. I actually don't think I've even seen girls going to school in trousers and I drive past about 4 schools on the school run every day. There is no way you could even turn upon the wrong colour socks at DD's school. At DS' school they aren't allowed to take the blazers off indoors unless the temp exceeds about 30 degrees and an email gets sent round by the head re- "summer uniform code". Nobody thinks twice about any of this so it's interesting to hear that it's not standard practice everywhere.

Gileswithachainsaw · 05/05/2017 17:23

anon

I'm curious as to what would happen if a child probe to utis advised not to wear tights by a Dr or one who needed those insoles to correct feet and they didn't fit in the 6 pairs of shoes or one who had started their periods and wanted to wear shorts under the dress invade of leakage or God forbid a kid who didntbwabtbthw world to know she still wore a nappy so would need leggings under the dress instead...

Not well thought out is it sounds strict for no good reason other than to point prove

Plunkette · 05/05/2017 17:23

Don't in places where non uniform is a daily occurrence there is considerably less concern about what clothes anyone is wearing.

The concern about wearing the "right" thing is caused by the fact that it's unusual to be out of uniform.

MaisyPops · 05/05/2017 17:28

How is it lazy for your DD to wear one type of trousers instead of a different type.

Because leggings aren't trousers!

I can see it being passable in infant school. Small kids, comfy fabric etc. If it's not against the uniform code I can see that being quite practical.

But not beyond that. And certainly not in secondary school. (Though no doubt I'll get people going down the route of 'wearing leggings doesn't affect the brain so if my child wants, my child gets'h