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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To loathe being pregnant?

65 replies

soontobeamum1982 · 30/04/2017 10:28

I am so fed up. Despite being, obviously, very excited about meeting my baby (this is my first) I'm wishing away the next three months. I'm almost 27 weeks and have had no end of problems. At the beginning it was all the usual first trimester difficulties, but I never ever had a lift to the tiredness or got the mythical 'glow'. Now i'm in constant pain from ligament stretching (I'm very short), can't sleep at all on my left side and due to being high risk i've been warned against any right side sleeping. So I'm exhausted.

Pregnancy has wrecked my eyesight - i'm struggling to see properly (awaiting the arrival of newly prescribed glasses) and have visual migraines at least three times a week which have taken me to L&D about six times now for pre-eclampsia checks. My BP is fine, but they don't stop, and they now apparently put me at high risk for pre-E.

I am also now suspected of gestational diabetes due to two high glucose urine tests and have had my 28 week bloods moved forward to this week to see how things are. I'm trying to keep to a v low GI diet (as I have been since 22 weeks, when I had the first dodgy urine test) but it's so hard to do and i'm gutted that it seems to have made no difference. We'll see what the bloods say.

All this has made me very anxious and I get worried about kick counts. Some days my bub is so quiet in there, and I get really freaked out. A friend of mine recently had a stillbirth at 31 weeks, which isn't helping my anxiety levels.

To top it all off I work in a job that is in some way related to politics (won't say any more on here in cases my colleagues are on mumsnet) and this sodding general election means i'm busier than ever in my last few weeks of work. (I go off at 34 weeks in mid june).

I'm sure i'll feel better once my glasses have arrived and my vision + migraines improve - but honestly, I am SO OVER THIS.

I'm sure i'll get yelled at for wishing my life away... but any tips for making the last weeks of pregnancy go as smoothly - and as quickly - as possible?

And please don't say 'enjoy the peace and freedom while it lasts'. Me and DP just had to cancel our final quick holiday this week because of all the testing i'm going through and the MW's request that i'm near my own hospital for checks whenever the migraines come.

OP posts:

Lunalovepud · 30/04/2017 22:35

YANBU. Being pregnant can really suck balls. Second time around for me so the novelty has well and truly worn off! I am fed up with it and I have ages to go - babies will be close in age too so I have been pregnant since the Spice Girls were number 1 so it feels...

Don't feel bad for not feeling ecstatic all of the time. You can feel terrible for women who struggle to conceive but your sympathy for them doesn't mean I can't feel a bit sorry for yourself sometimes too.

It's worth it when the baby finally arrives... I had a shit first pregnancy and an awful birth and PND for good measure but I would do it all over again a million times over and in a heartbeat for DC1... Obviously it hasn't put me off as I am expecting DC2.

Teabagtits · 30/04/2017 22:40

It took me 7 years to get over my first pregnancy before I got pregnant again and now I'm thinking that's because I forgot how horrendous it was. This time I've had HG although thankfully it's only nausea now and I can eat again. The baby has been low almost the entire time so very uncomfortable and time has dragged slower than a really slow thing. Only 8 weeks left for me and that seems like forever!

Changednamesorry · 01/05/2017 02:20

I hated being pregnant both times. I'd have a third if pregnancy only lasted a month.
As it is...I'm never doing it again.
I adore my 2 lads.....both amazing and indeed easy babies. But pregnancy is no fun at all. You have my sympathies.

notangelinajolie · 01/05/2017 02:38

I hated every minute of being pregnant and the little buggers outstayed their welcome and were all overdue. I actually found life with a new born baby was a walk in the park compared to pregnancy. And as for counting kicks I never did it. I don't recall anyone telling me to either which is a good job because none of mine moved much at all. Don't fret OP it will soon be over and the best bit can begin.

Batteriesallgone · 01/05/2017 07:06

Don't hold out for an easy baby OP. My order got lost there.

It'll all be worth it...in about 3 years time. When they are actual people and a member of your family.

Pregnancy is a good introduction to the thankless gruntwork that is 99% of being a mum. Scans are the 1% that keep you going.

Soyamilkisniceintea · 01/05/2017 07:12

Icy I terminated a planned pregnancy because the pregnancy bit was so awful. It's not straightforward.

Batteriesallgone · 01/05/2017 09:35

Soya

Sparklyuggs · 01/05/2017 19:58

I'm with you OP. I'm 27 weeks and desperately want this baby and tried for a long time but bring pregnant has made me so ill I've been signed off, I'm on bed rest half the time and can't walk much.

It's only recently that I've found other women admitting they didn't enjoy being pregnant and I feel much less guilty.

WatchHowISoar · 01/05/2017 22:25

Yanbu. Pregnancy is a means to an end.

Positive thinking doesn't always work, it made me feel so guilty and added to my anxiety because I was hating my pregnancy despite it being my longed for rainbow baby. Better to get through each day and just be one step closer.

I do want to do it again but I'm worried about the pregnancy. Few women admit to not enjoying it or not feeling a bond.

WatchHowISoar · 01/05/2017 22:26

Just to clarify I felt no as much joy due to issues bonding as well as many physical isdues

Batteriesallgone · 01/05/2017 22:34

Watch it was easier for me second time. I think because the end date was more definite in my head - it really would end! Ha.

WatchHowISoar · 02/05/2017 07:47

Lol that's good batteries, thanks for the reassurance.

nInachu · 02/05/2017 13:23

Currently 24 weeks and I hate it. Same as you I want the baby, but hate being this tired waddling mess.

MermaidsTears · 02/05/2017 13:25

It does suck op
I'm doing my third pregnancy now. I have 9 weeks left till due date.
This is absolutely the last time I could do this, I have all the things you've mentioned plus HG and am under my booking in weight, bleeding gums etc
BUT
In my experience of both previous times I had quick easy labour and I felt so so so amazing afterwards (all the sickness and ailment just melted away) that I seemed to cope so well with a newborn compared to a lot of people I know.
I was also slimmer than I'd ever been (not that it's important obviously) but it went a long way in helping me to suddenly feel better again.
I feel like I 'check out' of life for BNE months each time. So although I'm happy and lucky I've been able to do this three times, I am definitely viewing this as a means to an end and something that is nearly over.

Bluntness100 · 02/05/2017 13:28

I also hated being pregnant, I remember sitting in the garden crying two weeks before hand telling my husband i just wanted her to be born and I couldn't do it any more. Very disconcerting to him in terms of what to do...the good news is you're less scared about the whole birth thing as you're just gagging for it to be over,😂

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