MIL wants to make up after saying she's not interested in our baby.

[patronsaintofglocks]

Hi. Wondering if I could ask for some advice and see if I'm being totally unreasonable.

On New Year's Eve we went out with my mother in law and had a few too many. I was wearing high heels and lost my balance, unfortunately when I fell I grabbed her arm and she fell down too. She is usually quite volatile and no longer has any friends, nor speaks with her siblings and her other son, DIL and grandson due to her this.

She insisted on a trip to A and E, although she was fine and said she wanted nothing more to do with me. A little over two weeks on, we found out I was pregnant. She said she didn't want to be involved and was openly disapproving.

It's been 5 months now and although I've reached out three times. Once with an apology gift, once to ask her if she'd like to make up and be involved with the pregnancy, and yet again offering her to come to a gender scan. She's refused all via my partner and not spoken to me. She said she 'can't get over' New Years and doesn't want anything to do with us as a family. Hurtful of course.

Now she's found out we are having a girl she wants to meet up as she 'isn't interested in her other grandson (BIL's) and is pleased it's a girl.'

After 5 months of not asking if baby and I were dead or alive, I am upset and don't want to talk to her, nor see her. Especially now she's only interested we're having a girl. Am I being totally selfish?

Sounds like a vile and nasty woman. I'd go completely no contact

YANBU

She sounds nasty, toxic, just plain awful. She has done you a big favour in being so open and obvious about it. I wouldn't want her in mine or my child's life - she's highly unlikely to change.

You're not being selfish at all - you tried. She showed you who she is - believe her and keep as much distance as possible between you.

Keep this toxic madwoman away from your child!! She is beyond toxic. She's already rejected one grandchild (amongst all the other people she's fallen out with) - she'll definitely do the same to your child at some point. As a parent, it's your duty to protect your child/ren from bad situations. This woman definitely classifies as a bad situation.

I've no idea why you reached out to her three times. That's bonkers. Maybe one time, to a rational person (which MIL isn't) would be normal, but if they rejected me after the first time, there'd be no second/third/fourth... chances.