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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My mum bought the wrong paint

54 replies

bluestardressinggown · 28/04/2017 01:34

I'm moving in a couple of days into a flat that my parents bought. I will be renting from them, competitive rate.

Anyway, quite a lot needed to be done to the house before anyone could move in. I have ended up having to paint all of the rooms. It was agreed yesterday with my mum that I would go to the house to finish off painting the living room after work and that she would pick DD up from school and babysit. I told her that I had run out of a particular paint and will have to pick it up after work. She said she would get it and confirmed that she had bought it via text when I was at work. Anyway, I got to the house, change into my painty work clothes and see that she has got the wrong paint! I end up going to the nearest b and q 3 miles away via Uber to pick up the right paint. I had to finish painting tonight as I have no other opportunity to do before we move and that is what I discussed with my mum yesterday.

I was very annoyed when I realised that she got the wrong paint. Had a bit of a 'Basil Fawlty' moment on my own in the empty house, shouting etc. I texted my mum just letting her know the paint was the wrong one and I'll be getting another.

A couple of hours later I call her, I ask did you get my text, she said yes and starts saying 'ooh are you in the flat painting?' and makes out as though she didn't realise that was the plan. She then asks how long I'm going to be and how long she will have to wait until she goes. AIBU but this has really annoyed me. She either is claiming she can't remember out lengthy conversations about tonight's plan or she is just annoyed that I pointed out that she made a mistake. I would have liked her to at least acknowledge she made a mistake and apologise knowing that it was very inconvenient for me. It took a whole hour out of my paint time going to and from the shop to get the right paint. It also cost me a fortune. I was already knackered because I had worked a full day at hospital.

I hate moving anyway and am pretty stressed out so it is not going to take much to get me upset at the moment. I have this move and a whole load of other stuff going on...

OP posts:
Fruitcocktail6 · 28/04/2017 06:41

I think you sound like a sulky teenager

Lostwithinthehills · 28/04/2017 06:46

Op what benefit are you getting out of moving to your new flat from your current home? If you really hate moving, and I agree it is really stressful, there must be something that is making it worthwhile for you.

SavoyCabbage · 28/04/2017 06:54

If you find your parents frustrating, then it's probably a bad idea to have them as landlords.

UrsulaPandress · 28/04/2017 06:56

What was wrong with the paint?

JustMumNowNotMe · 28/04/2017 07:01

My god. If you were my daughter I'd be telling you to forget it and stay in your other flat.

They have paid for the paint, yet tour still complaining?!

Picking the wrong paint, easily done and easily rectified. Don't you ever make mistakes then?

You sound ungrateful and, frankly, pathetic.

NoYouDontKnowItAll · 28/04/2017 07:03

Your Mum's response would've annoyed me as well, I once had a friend who never listened and acted like she didn't know what was going on or what arrangements were etc and it's a frustrating piss take. She's already got the (albeit wrong) paint and was looking after your child so what else could she have thought she was doing that for. Anyway I hope you got all the painting done and it's over now

ChasedByBees · 28/04/2017 07:11

I am confused why you're moving in too if it's expensive, you don't know how long you can stay whilst you have somewhere already.

NavyandWhite · 28/04/2017 07:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 28/04/2017 07:23

If they were landlords and not your parents you wouldn't have even had new paint. Any rented place I ever lived in had bog standard magnolia walls. Moving is stressful but honestly OP, you come across a bit "Kevin the teenager"

Ellisandra · 28/04/2017 07:26

I spy with my little eye something beginning with back story.

BalloonSlayer · 28/04/2017 07:29

Well I think YANBU.

Flowers It's insanely annoying - actually can't even think of the words for the emotions I am trying to describe - when you have had a long conversation, agreed something, and then the other person acts as if it never took place.

(DH does this sort of thing a lot, can you tell?)

SheSaidHeSaid · 28/04/2017 07:57

YABU.

She made a mistake, they happen. Let it go.

Only1scoop · 28/04/2017 08:02

Agree with Savoy Cabbage
Would you not be better staying where you are?

origamiwarrior · 28/04/2017 08:13

Yes orange that means that I will be paying the competitive rental rate for the area i.e not getting family discount. What is your point?

No, that's not what competitive means. Competitive means 'better than those of a comparable nature'. So if you were talking salaries (where everyone wants a high one) competitive would mean you were paid higher than the average salary. If you are talking rents (where everyone wants to pay a low rent) competitive rent means you were paying less rent than average.

The word you were looking for was 'market rate'.

NanooCov · 28/04/2017 08:14

Bluestar, your original post very much sounded as though your parents were providing you with a flat when you didn't already have one.

Your further posts have made it clear that is still not the case.

But I still don't get it.

If you are happy where you are, why are you moving in? It's a bloody big favour to them because they got cold feet after making a significant purchase of a flat, and it sounds like there will be ongoing underlying resentment so just tell them you don't want to move in?!

And just tell them you don't have the time/energy to paint and they need to get someone in!

And if you're out of pocket from the paint purchase and Uber trip, ask for the money back!

olympicsrock · 28/04/2017 08:17

I am with you OP sounds bloody annoying- my mum aged 69 does this kind of thing too.

HappydaysArehere · 28/04/2017 08:37

First thought. Spoiled only child! Perhaps I am wrong. Things happen. People make mistakes and when you are busy it is annoying but you seem to have time to come on here for a rant. Cool down and get it into perspective. The walls will still be there when you are settled in. Hope you are calmer and happier now.

Newtssuitcase · 28/04/2017 08:42

OP you sound like a sulky 16 year old. She's your mum. Get a grip and give her a break. It was a mistake.

Catsick36 · 28/04/2017 08:46

Not her fault. If it's causing you that much stress and grief let them pay someone to finish it all off. You've got enough on your plate working and parenting. Be realistic about what you can manage.

FrenchMartiniTime · 28/04/2017 09:15

Is this a wind up? Surely nobody gets this annoyed by a tub of paint...

I feel really sorry for your mum, you sound really spoiled and to be honest, immature. Your post sounds like it's been written by a stroppy 15 year old.

God forbid you ever make a mistake OP Hmm

MatildaTheCat · 28/04/2017 09:25

I rent my investment flat to ds and his dp and from a mother/ LL perspective it's been bloody hard. At the beginning he spoke to me about minor matters in the tone of a sulky kid speaking to his mum and not his LL whilst expecting Top LL of the century service.

I sat him down and put him very, very straight and relations have improved immeasurably. Smile

OP, calm down and paint the walls. You didn't have to move in, you are making it sound as if you are doing them a favour when surely you chose to as there was some benefit to you and dd.

Enjoy your new home and treat your DM as you LL when discussing the flat. There lies contentment.

ImperialBlether · 28/04/2017 09:32

Am I the only person here who has sympathy for the OP? Some people are very cruel.

Jengnr · 28/04/2017 09:42

No, you're not. She sounds knackered and pissed off and was hoping that she could rely on her Mum to do something straightforward to give her a hand whilst she's got all these balls in the air.

If someone agrees to do something simple whilst you're the one holding everything together and they fuck it up it's bloody frustrating, especially when it then sets you back in terms of time, energy and money. Not even apologising and pretending they knew nothing about it is enough to tip you over the edge.

In the big scheme of things it isn't a big deal but to the OP, right now, it's just one more thing she has to handle and I can see why she's wound up. In six months time she'll laugh about it I expect.

viques · 28/04/2017 09:42

I know painting and decorating is always a pain, but actually, decorating around your furniture and belongings is what most people do. Having the luxury of living in one home and having access to a new home for decorating (without paying double rent) , while someone else babysits your child(for free) is something most people will never experience.

If the wrong colour paint sends someone into such a ranting frenzy then let's hope OP never does learn to drive/buy a car, screaming in an empty house is one thing, road rage in a lethal weapon is another.

ImperialBlether · 28/04/2017 10:10

It's stress that is making the OP scream - can't you see that?

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