Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not pulling her weight

182 replies

AnUnhappyStudent · 23/04/2017 07:41

I am a mature student at uni. We have to do a group presentation tomorrow and have been meeting as a group for the last couple of months to work on it. One of the group has really taken the piss.
Turned up to about a third of the meetings, not delivered on her stuff, not letting us know when she is not attending meetings but then turning up to the one session we had with tutor Hmm
I raised it with the group and it was agreed that we would mail her and say if she didn't get her finger out we were going to ask for her to be removed as she will be graded on something she hasn't contribute to.

Today we are meeting up for a run through and its been arranged weeks. Just had an email from her to say that her uncle is seriously ill and she will need to leave early! I don't believe it for a minute. We have had various stories of ill relatives and just serms like its another excuse. But I could be wrong.
Anyway we have to submit a record of how we worked as a group this can involve meeting notes, action logs and emails. If I include the email we sent her then it will be really obvious that she was not a team player but would it reflect badly on me for dobbing her in as it were?? And what if uncle is really ill? I would feel awful

OP posts:
WildIrishRose1 · 23/04/2017 09:12

Trifle I would agree with others on the thread when they say that this issue matters. I would rather be treated by a doctor who had done their work in college and had left it to others to complete, rather than someone who had coasted on the efforts of others.

befuddledgardener · 23/04/2017 09:12

Yes a simple record of who did what would work. She can always talk to the tutor about her uncle

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:14

Neolara:

I would just let it go. I'm not really bothered about giving anyone life lessons. If they don't hold down a job because they are lazy, that's their problem.

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:15

LittleCandle:

That wasn't what I said to Francis. Re-read.

And I don't think it is okay. I am just not prepared to lower myself to telling tales when I don't need to. I would choose to let it go.

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:16

WildIrishRose1:

I imagine you have been treated by many a doctor who cribbed someone else's lecture notes or didn't attend a presentation. Seriously, do you think otherwise?

roundaboutthetown · 23/04/2017 09:16

Trifleorburst - what do you think is the point of university?

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:17

roundaboutthetown:

I don't see the relevance of that. I am not responsible for their university experience. I am only responsible for mine.

WildIrishRose1 · 23/04/2017 09:19

No doubt, Trifle, but not attending one presentation or cribbing notes, is not an equable comparison here, surely?

DimsieMaitland · 23/04/2017 09:19

Suggest to your university that in future group work has an element of peer assessment on the collaborative element of assignments, perhaps using WebPA which is free to use.

webpaproject.lboro.ac.uk/

It has been developed to address this type of issue.

roundaboutthetown · 23/04/2017 09:20

If that is the case and they have made your university experience more crap, why are you letting it go? That's abloody useless explanation of why you wouldn't hand in a full record of how the group worked together, as requested.

FrancisCrawford · 23/04/2017 09:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GreenHariboBear · 23/04/2017 09:22

We had this. A few years ago I did a Masters as a mature student and we had to work with a difficult person on a practic assignment. It was like pulling teeth and it this person's attitude annoyed every team member.
It was a different scenario as practical work was just a part of other assignments that were being taken into account for grading, but I ended up having a chat with our tutor about this person's attitude and lack of teamwork spirit.

I also see this in my workplace though. There are always slackers and others that work harder to make up for it. It's infuriating.

Garlicansapphire · 23/04/2017 09:23

Well if this was a work situation and you wanted to make a project group work I'd expect you to raise it with her and ask her to pull her weight rather than going direct to dobbing her in it with the boss. Have any of you actually raised this with her?

In my opinion thats how you'd show that you'd tried to manage working as a group and avoid losing marks.

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:23

WildIrishRose1:

I know qualified doctors who were medics at uni and regularly missed lectures etc. Some of them spent more time in the pub than they did the library. It's what many people do at uni. They went on to pass their exams. I care not one not about their little indiscretions when they were younger.

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:24

*jot

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:25

FrancisCrawford/

All I can say is (again) you misinterpreted that comment. I explained it. Re-read.

LittleCandle · 23/04/2017 09:25

Okay, so if you are responsible for your university experience, how are you going to deal with it being at least disrupted, because this person did not turn up to meetings, and potentially buggered up because this person did not do their share of the work? Clearly the OP and the rest of her group have done extra work so that they do not have a gaping hole in their presentation, but why should this woman then be allowed to claim the credit for it? If this was your university group, would you still be happy to let it slide? I suspect you would, as you have just admitted that you can't be bothered, which is very sad. It appears you lack empathy to put yourself in the OP's shoes. That's okay, but since you have admitted that you couldn't care less what this person has done, why are you continually arguing with the rest of us who think that this is beyond the pale?

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:26

roundaboutthetown:

Why am I letting it go? Because I gain nothing from dwelling on it. I would also not allow something like this to ruin my university experience. It's minor. In a month I would have forgotten about it.

redexpat · 23/04/2017 09:26

Ive studied in the UK. Im now studying in Denmark. Every single assignment is group work here and it works. Why? Because we spend a morning learning about how to make it , how to assign roles, write group contracts, how to resolve conflict etc. There are advisors available.

I now love group work, am more aware of my strengths and the idea of writing my dissertation alone reduced me to tears.

Fredmitten · 23/04/2017 09:27

I had this during a piece of group work on my masters. In the end the rest of us said nothing. She dropped out a couple of weeks later and I tend to the view these things sort themselves out in the long no run.
Good luck for tomorrow Smile

Aeroflotgirl · 23/04/2017 09:28

Yanbu, you tell the truth, you are adults in an adult environment, and she is taking the piss. If her uncle is sick, she should go through the proper channels. I would also have a word with your tutor about her.

Trifleorbust · 23/04/2017 09:28

LittleCandle:

Because I disagree with you. This is AIBU. That's how it works. My minority opinion shouldn't bother you. I just wouldn't care enough about this to go out of my way. Sorry if that offends you, although I am confused as to why.

Aeroflotgirl · 23/04/2017 09:33

Garlic op already has! She should submit accurate accounts, its not dobbing in.

FrancisCrawford · 23/04/2017 09:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LittleCandle · 23/04/2017 09:36

It doesn't offend me; I don't offend that easily. I just don't know why you keep arguing about it when you have said, in many different ways, that you don't care about this at all. Fine, you said so, but why do you keep repeating yourself? We got the message that you don't care either way and are afraid to be seen as a tattletale. Okay, that's fine for you. The rest of us disagree, and you keep calling us out. I know this is AIBU, and I expect lively discussion, but you are not discussing; you are simply saying that we are all wrong because we disagree with you. Guess what? We aren't going to change our minds because you think we should. The OP posted this and I expect she wanted to read the different opinions to help clarify in her mind what she intends to do. I hope that she has come to her decision. On the other hand, you keep saying you wouldn't care enough about this, so if that is the case, why are you replying to each and every post by saying that you don't care? Obviously you do, or you would have posted the once and left it at that.