To think management were right to veto this collection?

[user1485342611]

A couple of women at work have recently become grandparents, and two more women have first grandchildren due in the next few months.

A colleague started collections to buy presents for the two new babies, but management stepped in and said office wide collections for grandchildren were 'not appropriate.'

A few people are annoyed, but others are relieved as we already have collections for colleagues' new babies, weddings, leaving or retiring, and it can just get a bit much at times.

AIBU to think management were right to step in and were not 'treating us like kids' as one colleague has stated.

Wish they'd put a stop to them entirely.

Well, in fairness Expat, if someone's leaving a job they've been in for years it would be a bit sad if they were sent off empty handed.

Kids of staff yes, grandkids no. Management are right.

Management were correct to stop this collection.
If a close employee wishes to buy a personal gift that is ok

There is also pressure to contribute to worldwide charities and donations for worthy local causes

Good decision by management! That is ridiculous!

The only time we ever had a collection at work for a colleague's grandchild was when the poor baby died, and we donated the money to the local neonatal unit.

Wish they'd put a stop to them entirely

I agree. When you are working at a job you hate out of sheer economic necessity, the last thing you need is for people to be asking for a slice of that hard-earned money every week.

Every week would be a bit much I agree. But a small number of collections going around every year to mark big events such as a colleague retiring or getting married surely makes for a nicer workplace? I wouldn't like to work somewhere where all causes for celebration were ignored. I think there's a happy medium.

You're there to work not hand over money for constant ridiculous requests.
Yanbu

'Well, in fairness Expat, if someone's leaving a job they've been in for years it would be a bit sad if they were sent off empty handed.'

Then restrict them to leaving do/retirements. Don't really see the need to extract money from people because someone got married or reproduces.

I don't think that there should be any workplace collections at all, if a small want to get together and buy a gift then that's fine but not an organised whole office collection. They only lead to problems with some people not being able to afford to contribute and others being left out.

As a manager I hate collections. I always find a way to buy a gift and get it through expenses. The most I will allow is a card, bought on behalf of the company, to be passed around for everyone to sign.

I agree that office wide collections should only be for people retiring. Wedding and baby collections should be confined to immediate colleagues, unless it's a small organisation where everyone knows everyone.

I think this is fine. Unless it is a teeny tiny company and everyone knows these families personally and engages socially it's inappropriate to do this in the workplace.

Genuine story: shortly after my mum started work (hospital) she was asked to contribute to expensive flowers for the supervisor's parents' big wedding anniversary. Like a fool, she did contribute as she was worried it would be held against her if she didn't.
It does get ridiculous. Mum is p/t and a low earner and one month she ended up giving £25 to various collections!

^ she had never met these people!

Collecting for colleagues grandkids is ridiculous! If a persons particular friends want to give then nothing's stopping them, but no need for office collections!

I've left two workplaces over the last few years

I actually HATED people going round organising "stuff" on my behalf when I left?

I felt quite self-conscious having everyone summoned from their desks to stand over a cake or (under busy conditions) someone having to go round and get everyone to sign a card.

I got on with my colleagues but am not overly "hi babe" sentimental type so not sure why this happened!

I'm in my 30's and want a good reference and to leave on the dot and on time and my colleagues to have acted professionally and respectfully, not have Nicky from accounts who I've exchanged three words with guilt tripped to contribute to something I probably won't want or would have bought myself.

Similarly, I imagine there can be a bit of tension if someone ISN'T being collected for (high potential for bullies to make someone feel excluded, etc).

I think WanttoBeSupermum you have the right idea with just keeping it all as low key as possible!

In our office someone who starts a collection will send an email round saying 'collection for so and so's special occasion, if you want to contribute the envelope's in my desk' which is ideal because there is absolutely no pressure. The cards do get passed around for everyone to sign. I normally contribute for major events and for those I know well, I wouldn't bother for a grand child! (not that anyone here has reached that age!)

I think I only agree with collections if someone is leaving or if they are seriously ill in hospital tbh. Seems to be collections for everything these days

You're not wrong that is WAY beyond the 'reasonableness' of office collections, but I don't agree with this I agree that office wide collections should only be for people retiring.

However, as with most MN threads, you all picture your own situation. A lot of this is going to depend on how big "the office" is. I work as part of a small Team, and we work agilely (in different building around the City, and also from home) so can go for a few weeks on occasion without seeing someone, but we all get on and like to see each other, so it's nice to celebrate 'big' birthdays, and part of that is getting a gift. We also all bung in a tenner at the start of the year, so there is a 'fund' with which we can get flowers if someone is ill or bereaved without having to see everyone to arrange a collection. That's easy for us, as none of us are likely to be having any more babies, and I think it's pretty unlikely any of us are getting engaged or married so there aren't billions of collections. This would be different if there were 80 of you working in one office, 5 days a week, and including a lot of people who do things like getting married and having babies.
In the case of which, I'd have thought it would make sense to have a bit more of a structured 'policy' although I wouldn't want to be the one to organise it.

I worked in a team of 12 for 6 months. Multiple birthdays, leavings, grandchildren at a fiver a time, and then I got a pot plant when I left :-s

Sane management! Hooray!
Good on them, it's so easy not to act for fear of being seen as mean but it really can get ridiculous and impact on colleagues on low incomes/ high outgoings.

I contributed to two engagement and three wedding presents for the same person and two babies. Thete were people who refused after the first two weddings.

Our collections tend to be circulated via email: "If you want to contribute, see Susan" rather than envelopes being passed around, so there isn't really any pressure - you can just ignore the email. I think if excessive collections are becoming an issue, having a 'no envelope' policy would be a more effective solution than management telling people what they can and can't collect for, which does come across as rather controlling.

I wouldn't give for a grandchild unless the circumstances were exceptional.