To think something should of been said?!

[user1470064958]

Visited some family with DD today, and I've come away really upset I'm not sure if I'm being oversensitive or overreacting.

A conversation took place and we looked at some old baby pics of their little ones, a comment was made by one of the kids how she was a fat baby in one of the pictures, she then said I was 'fat like you, you were really fat' to which I replied I wasn't a fat baby, she then replied 'no you used to be really fat!!! '

In context I was previously a size 12 (so never really fat , not fat at all!! ) I'm now a size 6 as I have severe IBS

What's upset me as mum and grandma were there and neither told her that was rude or not to say that, even after I repeated it to them in shock. Nothing was said at all apparently that was fine to say to me and not rude etc.

Also what concerns me is I think that must of been said about me by the adults as kids especially under 10s don't tend to remember how someone looked 4 years ago?!

I think if DD ever said that I'd be mortified , I can't believe it was ignored?!

What solo said. In all her posts.

Thanks solo!

And nobhill I don't really think I should tell off people's children when their parents are witnessing their bad behaviors

But the comment was said to you. Maybe the parents didn't find it all that rude or were waiting to see how you reacted. I would tell a child if I though they were rude.

YANBU. DD of 'family friends' persistently criticised our diet and told us how unhealthy we were. She was 10. And we weren't. Her parents said nothing to challenge it. Drove us mad - so rude of her and of course them!

And 12 is far from fat.

'Did you mean to be so rude?' is ideal here.

Size 12 I mean !

Well you weren't fat so why let a child's clumsy expression of how you are now very thin bother you?

She was rude,as is the poster saying HAVE
Everybody makes errors when writing - English is my second language, I probably make a lot. This is not an autocorrect or a minor misspelling error, it is a wrongly constructed sentence that I see more and more.
Not pointing out such an error when it is displayed in a thread title and in the OP is IMO accepting it as a normal way to write in English.

It isn't a normal way to write in English, its wrong.

It is very bad form to correct someone's English.

HAVE not OF

Is it worse that complaining about other peoples children behind their backs while unwilling to say anything to their faces? I don't think so.

Oh sod off and start another thread about the of /have thing. We haven't had one for ,ooooh ,at least a week.

To be fair, it sounds as if she called you fat in defence of somebody else calling her fat (albeit as a baby). But people were calling other people fat in this situation, so she thought it was ok to do that too.

Not pointing out such an error when it is displayed in a thread title and in the OP is IMO accepting it as a normal way to write in English

Or it's accepting that some people don't know stuff that other people do AND (and this bit is crucial) that it's not your job to point that out when it's totally irrelevant to the point because YOU'RE NOT HER ENGLISH TEACHER.

I honestly thought we'd left the grammar police somewhere back with the pom bear thread?

No one else has pointed that out,Coastal. Good job you came along,eh.

its wrong

Irony prize...

The grammar police are tedious fuckers who never let a chance to put someone down pass them by.

Yabu. A kid called you fat. Hardly post worthy. You were chubby, you're not now.

The grammar police are tedious fuckers who never let a chance to put someone down pass them by
First time ever I have commented on grammar or spelling though...

I think when your child comes out with something rude like that (and even children of the nicest parents will do that sometimes before they learn what's acceptable to say) then if you're still in the earshot of the other person you often just freeze without knowing what's best to say. I think lots of parents would feel that making a big thing of correcting the child publically only draws more attention to it and risks digging the hole they're already in "but the man's hair does look silly mummy. It looks just like the American man on the telly that you and Daddy said made him look like a t...mummy why are you pulling me away I thought we were going in here?". If you're not sure what to do in the heat of the moment then it's natural (even if not correct) to change the subject and explain to your child later behind closed doors.

If someone should have told the kid its not ok to call someone fat, should someone have told you that it wasn't ok to call her fat as a baby?

Have and of are two completely separate words. That's not even a problem with grammar. Surely that's a bigger problem than who is a size 12 and who isn't?
If I had two words (not tenses of the same word but words which serve completely different functions) confused I'd want to know. Wouldn't you?

It's a shame you know so much about have/of and yet can't punctuate your smug shit correctly Coastal.

I wouldn't want someone to tell me after loads of people already had. I bet you never even read the thread in your race to correct the OP.

How clever you sound, Coastal

And the other so-called grammar pedants correcting elementary mistakes. OP said she was worn out, and had no need to apologise as she did.