Two Week Old Baby Queries

[AlexLouisa01]

My wife and I have a two week old son who sleeps for about five hrs in 24 in three or four stints and feeds for hrs. He is currently on his 5th hr of feeding. Is this OK? Also Louisa is starting to crack with the lack of sleep. Do you definitely have to wait for a month before you can start feeding with a bottle?

I'd be careful about expressing at this stage because you don't want to risk creating an oversupply which can cause blocked ducts and mastitis.

I agree with other posters that the baby may actually be asleep and not actively feeding. They don't always come off when they're done and babies continue to suck even when they're fast asleep. You can tell that it's just comfort feeding because the sucks are gentle and far apart. You'll hear a difference in the baby's breathing too as he relaxes. He'll let you know if he's not done so don't be afraid to unlatch.

Have you tried a hand on his chest as he goes in to his cot? Or stroking the side of his face gently can work too. I find that my baby is more likely to stay down if she's still when I walk away and those things help calm her. We bought a gro snug swaddle sleeping bag when she was a few days old because she windmills her arms if she's disturbed, it made a huge difference and we were able to put her down at night.

I got mastitis but that was because DS had tongue tie and was feeding constantly but not efficiently.
Haven't had any issues with mastitis since his tongue tie was sorted and I've been expressing once a day.

In my view:

• it all sounds normal for baby to be feeding so much. He is actually sleeping/resting more than 5 hours as part of that feeding is probably sleeping/resting. It is very important to let those cluster feeds happen at this early stage as it 'plans' the milk supply/production baby needs.
• if the mum is struggling with sleep it could help to consider learning to feed lying down and also consider co-sleeping. I have a 2 week old who feeds a lot but I co-sleep and feed him in the baby carrier too so it's not too taxing - but it's my 3Rd child! :)

-I would not introduce a bottle of expressed milk until at least 1 month also because expressing so early could disrupt milk production and could lead to difficulties. Also expressing is not easy and it may be best to wait for mum to be settled in her feeding routine etc first. And yes it could affect his latch.

• I would not use a dummy, it's pointless in my view. Or if you choose to use a dummy then wait as right now LO is feeding to get the right milk supply, let's not interfere with that with a dummy. Yes when he is older LO will be feeding for comfort too but it may be perfectly manageable, no need for a dummy!

I mixed bottle and breast with DD. DD much preferred BF, no confusion for her.

We found that DD liked to be cuddled to sleep, and we could transfer her to the Moses basket as long as she had slept for at least 30 minutes. We discovered the minimum time by trial and error. If we held her for only 20/25 mins, she would wake up, 30+ and she would be asleep for a few hours.

It's hard work to both of you!

We used a 'sleep sheep' and a dummy as sleep queues for DD, too. We found that the 'background noise' from the sleep sheep helped to keep DD asleep. DD had been in NICU for quite a while after she was born so the silence woke her up!

Mine is 21 weeks and still sleeps on me in the day for naps if we're in the house. She sleeps through the night in our next to me cot but won't sleep in it during the day.

It's best to find what works for all of you in the early weeks. I was worried that she wouldn't sleep at all because she only ever slept on me but from about 6 weeks she just went in the cot and slept 8 hours, it was the best!

If it's a full size one it would definitely not feel a bit overwhelming for a newborn. If you are thinking of a dummy we found the Mam ones to be the only ones our daughter likes.

Also I would nto worry/focus too much of baby going to sleep 'in his bed' - he is still very little and may be more comfortable being held (can be by you!) Or carried rather than sleeping in a bed.
Altho it may be a bit early for that you could try putting him on you in a baby carrier and going for a long-ish walk to give mum a break/rest. It may be early now but will definitely be an option as LO gets bigger.

Dr Harvey Karp. 5Ss technique. Book from Amazon (or there are probably websites/videos). I didn't have the first clue on helping a baby to sleep so his ideas really saved my sanity.

(Of course my post about sleeping was about day time sleeps :))

We have a 2 year old DS and a 5 day old DD. Both bottle fed from birth. DS was so easy when he was newborn, slept, fed, slept, fed bit of crying but not much, but DD is very awake for lots of the day and has been since she was born. DH Is pushing her round the park as I type hoping she will snooze. She isn't whingey just does not seem to need a lot of sleep. Likes to be cuddled in.

We found the answer by trial and error really. We have the next to me crib but in the early days had the same problem as you are having. We gave up and put her in her pram next to the bed swaddled. This worked for a while so we decided to try her back in her next to me. We got her a babymoov cosydream pillow and started putting her in her baby sleeping bag. We haven't had a problem so far putting her down at night. I also have Ewan the dream sheep but he eats batteries so been using white noise from YouTube which works just as well.

Early days are tough. We used to swap shifts. I would go to bed about 7pm for a few hours and dh would have baby until she needed fed then I would do nights.

Have you tried a wrap? Like this www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B00YFPD76K/ref=mp_s_a_1_2_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1492247125&sr=8-2&keywords=baby+wrap+sling+newborn&tag=mumsnetforum-21
(Not recommending that one specifically just to give you the picture) I did most things with DS in one of these - had a DD to sort to so had to keep going! But DH could too - DS just didn't want to be put down!
If you use facebook look up 'sling meets' or 'sling groups' locally to you. (Or pm me your town/location and I can try to find one for you).

Hope all is going better this morning!

I think co sleeping sounds like the answer. Fed is best is a ridiculous comment. Of course between starving the baby, PND (which I suffer from) formula feeding is needed sometimes but pushed too easily. By saying it is best does not allow a mother to make an informed decision.

I suffered with pain for two months and baby had tongue tie.

But if suggesting not moving straight to formula makes me smug then ok.

Hi- trainee midwife here. Congrats on your baby!

Do you mean that your baby is sleeping for a total of 5 hours in 24? This is not a normal sleeping pattern for a newborn. While babies do differ, a 2 week old breastfed baby should be spending most of their time asleep, waking mainly for feeds. Feeding is likely to be very frequent, between every 1 and 3 hours, and could take between 40 mins to an hour for each feed. So for example, if your baby feeds around every 1.5 hours and takes an hour to finish a feed, this could be both normal and also feel pretty continuous! Babies also feed for closeness and it is common for newborns to only want to sleep on the breast. Look up the 4th trimester.

A better indicator is how your baby behaves when awake or immediately after a feed. Does he/she seem unsettled most of the time? A 2 week old should be having at least 6 soaking nappies a day, as well as dirty ones. Is the weight gain ok? How does feeding feel for your wife. Is it comfortable or painful? What do her instincts tell her? Does she think something is wrong?

I think you need some face to face breastfeeding support from a Lactation consultant asap. There could be something like a tongue tie or a problem with the baby's latch that means baby is not transferring milk effectively. By all means speak to your community midwife, but be aware that not all midwives are as knowledgable about breastfeeding as they should be. A Lactation consultant is an expert and will be able to spot any problems.

Of course you may introduce a bottle if you choose, it's your baby! If your wife is able to express with a pump, you could do some feeds to give her a break and let her rest. If she struggles to express, or simply doesn't want to then formula is an option. Just be aware that in the early days baby needs to go to the breast frequently to maintain supply, supplementing with formula disrupts the balance and might mean that her supply suffers later down the line. However an occasional bottle shouldn't be a problem. Another thing to be aware of is the possibility of nipple confusion, where baby rejects the breast in favour of the bottle.

Carrying the baby in a sling is a good way to calm him/her if they're fussy, but definitely do get some breastfeeding support as what you mention doesn't sound entirely normal to me.

Good luck!

If this were my baby I would be concerned that he is only sleeping for five hours. The bf ff question is secondary, you should do whatever is best for you as a family, but regardless I would want a medical professional to reassure me that sleeping only 5 hours is OK and that there is no underlying issue keeping the baby awake.

That's not enough sleep. For baby or wife. If he really has only slept for 5 hours in the past 24, you're going to need to get some medical attention.

How are you getting on, OP?

Thanks for all your messages. He is sleeping for up to 3hrs at a time but still loads of one's and two's. Its a lottery if he stays in his chicco cot. If not then he will sleep on a shoulder. We are too tired to make him stay in it. Louisa is going to feed him whenever he wants as he is putting weight on and is nearly out of his 1 month clothes. After 4 weeks we will bottle feed him expressed milk so we can take it in shifts.
You guys that have a baby and young children are super heros. I had no idea parenting would be so hard and i have no idea how you do it.

Try a cocoonababy and ewan the dream sheep. Both have great reviews.

Are you planning on bottle feeding him for all his feeds? If so, that's a lot of expressing that will need to happen along side the feeds.

It will get easier very soon, the first baby was a MAJOR shock to me and I swore I'd never have another. I had no idea how bad sleep deprivation was combined with a baby who really struggled with breast feeding the first month.

I now have a 5, 3 and 18 month old! It really does get easier and you're being a very supportive husband which is wonderful.

Just saw your update. Do you mean that the baby only sleeps a total of 5 hours in every 24? That sounds unusual and I'd want a doctor's opinion on that.

If you mean that the baby only sleeps 1 to 3 hours at a time before he needs feeding that is, unfortunately, normal! Luckily it does not last that long. The best way to deal with it is to give up on doing anything else, lie in bed/get comfy on sofa, with food, drinks, the TV and ipad.

See how it goes but breastfeeding and then expressing can be hard work. I always found it easier just to breastfeed. Nothing wrong with mixed feeding though, which would give your wife more of a break.

Op unless you actually meant your baby was only sleeping for 5 hours total in 24 hours then your ds sounds normal. My ds needed fed every 2 hours for the first couple of weeks then gradually down to 3 hours probably about week 4.

My son didn't go to sleep (from being put down awake or drowsy) til he was 4 months old. He slept on me, on DH, or sometimes if he was properly deeply asleep we could transfer him into his crib without him waking up. He would definitely not have gone into his crib and just gone to sleep, and if he wasn't deeply asleep he would wake up two minutes after going down. I would let your DC sleep on you as much as possible during the day and take turns for the other parent to nap, he may also like sleeping in his pram or the car (but don't leave him in his car seat when you're not in the car, or for long journeys without a break).

Expressing is not a walk in the park, it is time consuming and can be uncomfortable, so may not be the answer to all your problems, however breastfeeding does get easier, and as he grows and his stomach gets bigger, he will have longer feeds, be fuller for longer and sleep for longer. It is HARD WORK, you are doing great, hang in there.

FWIW I'm breastfeeding and expressing enough for one feed per day, so DH can give DS the breast milk in a bottle, and it gives me a 5-6 hour break between feeds, instead of 2-3 hours. It's been a lifesaver. I don't find it too much work - I use a Haakaa pump on one boob while feeding from the other. And I use my double electric pump once a day but it only takes about 15 minutes to get enough milk. I didn't do it when DS was feeding constantly though, as I really wanted and needed a break!

OP has the baby been checked for tongue tie?