Just one text

[Rebeccajane14]

Had the worse fall out last night with DP over girl that will not leave us alone. Last year she was really nasty, told DP she didn't like me for no reason when I made such an effort to be a good friend to her and we all fell out. Now she messages him and me and makes out nothing happened. I don't feel comfortable with her after she used to constantly tell my DP she loved him while she had a DP aswell. And still recently messaged MIL to say she liked him-yes we're adults which is pathetic.
We fell out because I asked DP to reply to her needy text to just say please stop with the messages and leave us alone. Nothing nasty just to get the point across but he won't. AIBU to have expected him to just send a text like that not just say "I'll ignore it" because this is beginning to stress me out it's a waiting game for the next text and is really straining on our relationship. I know I shouldn't take it out on DP but this girl is getting between our relationship and although DP wants nothing to do with her he still won't send her one little text to say stop.

[Batgirlspants]

All very strange op.

You and your do need yo both be on the same page here that it needs stopping. Then you both need to inform her and her partner that you want no more contact from her in any way and if that is ignored you will assume its harassment and stalking and you will involved the police.

I just struggle to see how on earth your dh is still friends with her partner??

[Batgirlspants]

I hate to add this but do you think your dh has had more intimate contact with her than you know and she's threatening to tell you if he ignores her? That might also account for why your partner hasn't told her partner his so called best mate.

[ems137]

What does her partner make of all of this?

I'm pretty sure my DH would have something to say if I was constantly harassing another man and then doing so using his phone!

[aaaaargghhhhelpme]

Surely her dp would be able to find the messages on his phone? I would just reply to him now when you know her dps got his phone back and say - did you mean to send this?

I understand him not wanting to rock the boat (or sticking his head in the sand as I prefer to think!) but I'd ask him what would it take for him to say stop. She's already harassing him.

How close is he to her dp? This sounds like a conversation they should be having...

[Laiste]

stressedtothemax12 Wed 12-Apr-17 07:45:48 - She isn't a girl she is fully adult and older than myself. But she is not acting like one.

Are you the OP stressed?

Have your DP and hers had a discussion about this? It's a bloody silly situation.

[stumblymonkeyremix]

In this situation personally:

• I would, along with my partner, tell her DP what was happening

• Explain to him that we need to block his number to stop the harassment

• I would send one final text/message/letter or whatever to her to explain very clearly and neutrally that we were keeping a log of every contact made and that if she continued this unwanted harassment we would start to notify the police

• I would then ignore all contacts but keep a record of date, time, content, etc

• If it continued I would contact the police re:harassment

If this was a man doing the same to you I don't think you'd think twice about it being harassment.

She sounds mentally unhinged.

[stressedtothemax12]

Thanks for all the comments. I think it's clear now to me and DP it's bordering harassment and I am going to message the couple and explain this. Thank you all. We're all in our 20's, this really isn't needed and just seems so immature.

[DonaldStott]

Yes. Email her dp. Tell him to tell her if she messages you again, from ANY account. You will be contacting the police.

Block him too. Your partner surely cannot be friends with him when his OH is declaring her undying love for your partner.

How bizarre.

[CigarsofthePharoahs]

I agree you need to speak to the couple. Does her partner have any idea about what's been happening?
Once you have spoken to them, then its time to block the dp's phone as well.
If it persists then I would strongly consider involving the police. Its harassment.