To think CMS should be paid from the day the baby is born?

[summerfling]

& not the date they bloody contact the NRP.

This my friends, is more of a rant....I am seriously naused off, that my ex won't have to start paying for our son until he's at least 5 weeks old, who the bloody hell set these stupid rules!!

The only reason they won't contact him yet is because I'm awaiting a letter from child Benefit, something I obviously couldn't claim until DS arrived.

Pisses me off! The amount of stuff I've bought for DS since he arrived & ex is contributing to naff all, simply because some dick decided NRP's shouldn't have to pay until they are contacted!

Rant over, thanks for reading!

Good luck to you, OP. Be prepared to ring, write, text, email and visit CMS in person every week for the next ten years, if my case is anything to go by...

I've got everything including address, even his gf's address.

I bloody hope they do! He's not getting out of paying

I've already given consent for them to offer him a DNA test should he deny paternity.

I'm hoping my case will be straightforward, as he is employed, lives at home, on electoral register.

It should be very simple

be prepared for that hilarious but deadly serious phonecall of "nrp would like you to consider a family based arrangement of £150 a month" which is half the amount they calculated and also not enforcable when he blatantly wont pay it anyway...

i had that phone call last week!

sorry that im going for every penny they are entitled to, especially after 3 years of DV topped off by you clearing my account to spend on OW as a parting blow. bastard.

I fully expect my ex to try the same, however he'd be an absolute moron if he thinks il go for it!

I will not accept any arrangement that isn't through CSA, I want all money enforceable.

My ex likes to control people & situations....not this one buddy!

I control this one! He'll struggle with that, knowing he has to transfer money he earned into my bank account.

Poor guy

I'm still waiting 12 years on.

Hope you have more luck op.

I'd give anything for £150 a month. Backdated 16 years. Times two.

A short period of backdating might make sense, but it's no good expecting a man to produce months of back-money out of his arse. He probably hasn't got it,

Presumably he knew of the impending birth of his child (op?) and therefore should have be prepared to provide from day 1. This shouldn't be news to him. The op has had to cover his share by herself, why should she foot all of the bill, especially when he is able to work full time?!

Totally agree with you op, it is ridiculous that parents can get away with not providing for their children. Best of luck.

sad part of my case is that my 2 year old has huge speech problems, if he paid what he is supposed to the first thing i would bloody do is sort her out private SALT as the waits are so huge on nhs for every stage.

Nearly 16 years on and not a penny, other than about £100 he gave me when she was born. He had nicked more than that off me when we were together... apparently I'll never get anything but they can't tell me why?? I even get the privelege of a letter every six months telling me he has paid me £0.00, so every six months I get pissed off about it again!

OP- you will not have to pay the £20 set up fee if there is DV involved. I know because I've been through this myself.

When i used to work for csa (5 years ago) we checked the address on any child benefit and any tax credit claim for said child matched nrp address for children that nrp claimed were living with him, so that required that he give us the child benefit or child reference (NI) number

Nrp address was verified by CIS (central gov database fed into by all benefit and tax departments) and credit checks. If nrp has not dealt with any gov department recently and we had an outdated address and the cms letter is returned - that is what is meant by not traceable

Just the same here. One excuse was they couldn't trace him. He was living at the same address then he'd had since the 1980s. It's findable online, for verification. He had claimed benefits - Incapacity Benefit til he was kicked off it for swinging the lead. They knew damn well where he was.

He wouldn't have opened their letters as he was paranoid.

I'm now wondering if harassment counts as DV as he was convicted of harrassing me, in a court of law, several years back (15 years after I'd finished with him). Oddly, he could bombard me with emails and threatening letters for 15 years and yet they claimed he no longer existed.

Several years back he inherited a third of a house worth about a million. My kids live in a council house on tax credits. He's been sunning himself abroad for a year. They have never had a proper holiday apart from a few days in a tent, here and there.

I also get the insulting letter saying feck off he owes £0.

I can't afford the £20 to claim. It's simply not there. Government knew this would be the situation for many women. They are clearly on the defaulting parent's side.

summerfling I'd like to imagine I have 'control' as well. I went through that horrendous Family Courts procedure for 18 months, after all, to get residency. (He fought me even though he didn't want them and left them without a penny). I also had to take him to court twice for harrasment. Police said I was a 'brave lady' (yes, they are still in 1842). As I persisted when he arsed the courts around so much it had to be rescheduled. I was in a witness holding room all day with women in DV cases and one after one, they backed out of giving evidence in court. I didn't and had another 400 mile round trip when we got him back there.

Even I can't get a penny.

5 weeks is nothing. Try 15 and 16 years for two kids, respectively.

If I could sue the CSA or whatever they call themselves now I would sue the arse off every single one of them.

I advised of the DV but was told I'd still have to pay the fee as it was down to the person dealing with my claim as to whether I paid or not.

I'm not bothered about paying it, I just want them to hurry up & contact him.

Summer, My changeover was in February and the payments via CMS started last week in April. I didn't have to pay the fee and he was told if he didn't pay up or messed me around they would be taking an extra 20% on top every month. He is military so can't escape although believe me he told some almighty porkies to the CSA to get out of paying anything. Took months to sort that out. CSA have told him he still owes for March but I think he will get away with that one.

Il have a chat with them once CB is in place.

I will advise of pretty much everything I can't so they are aware if he's chatting quite a bit of shit.

I've already given the go ahead for a DNA test & advised I'd like to do direct pay (give him the chance to save 20%).

We will see what kind of crap he comes out with when they get in touch! I'm actually intrigued!

Pisses me off, can't claim CSA until my child Benefit claim is all sorted!
It can take up to 3 months!!!!! That's not fair, so I've got to foot the whole bill for at least 3 months??

Complete piss take & makes me angry.

""A short period of backdating might make sense, but it's no good expecting a man to produce months of back-money out of his arse.""

Well, United Utilities, Television Licensing and Council Tax ensure that every penny of backdated owing is collected, so I'm sure that the CSA could.

I got into a good £1000 arrears with rent in a previous tenancy.....I couldn't afford it yet they still pursued me for it!

I advised of the DV but was told I'd still have to pay the fee as it was down to the person dealing with my claim as to whether I paid or not.

Exact same happened to me

i got mine waived no problems but then there was also a prosecution for the dv

I'm happy to pay it given it's a small fee, however it states as long as I can prove DV I.E statements to police or an organisation & I can.

They won't accept it

It's a farce sadly. Yes both parents should pay for their child/children, not one being given 5 weeks grace.
I've found them to be as farcical.
I phoned them and supplied absent parents name, address, telephone number, NI no. Along with Employer and salary (the latter was very difficult to find out).
They did nothing about it for months until I kept contacting them and advising I'd contact my MP.
The delay being they were waiting for evidence! Under the absent parents 'right to be believed' farce.
It was difficult enough to find out Employers details without somehow getting a payslip! Months of not paying, then 'investigating' where he'd advised them he didn't work and he 'has the right to be believed'.
More months went by, they eventually contacted him and he suddenly lost his job -prefering to leave than financially support his own children.
He later got a new job and it took them over 4 months to decide he actually needed to pay.
It's equal to a quarter of the monthly childcare costs. Plus there's food, clothles, etc, etc.
I remain astounded one parent can refuse to support their own children for so long and then have to pay such a minimal amount.

Sadly the government are shit.

USA have the right idea, they work out how much it costs to raise a child & send the NRP a bill REGARDLESS as to whether they've a job or not, the amount simply builds up. They don't pay, so they go to prison JOB WELL DONE!

However over here it's, oh, you've no money?? Oh okay!! We'll leave you alone then.