Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To think I should be able to go for a run without being sexually harassed or cat called at by pervy men?

61 replies

Runny · 07/04/2017 15:44

Today I decided to go outside for a run for the first time since about September. Over the winter months Ive been using the treadmill in the gym, but now the weather has started to improve again I was really looking foreward to getting out there again.

I'd been out for about 15 minutes and was she just making my way back home when some twat on a motorbike (with L plates no less, so probably young) comes speeding past me, making hand gestures and shouting obsceneties at me that I couldn't really make out exactly what they were. It had to be aimed at me as I was the only person around. I should add, I was wearing an over sized tatty T-shirt and tatty old running trousers so hardly flashing the flesh (not that it should matter, obviously), but this idiot still thought it was acceptable to hurl sexist abuse at me.

Being in the gym all these months I'd forgotten about this. It's one of the pit falls of being a woman out running. This is not the first time it's happened, Ive had men of all ages slow down their cars and leer at me, shout abuse, laugh etc. God knows how they'd feel if someone did the same to treir wife/mother/daughter/sister.

Honestly what gives them the right to behave like this? It make sure me want to just go back into the gym and stay there.

OP posts:

Bringbackpublicfloggings · 07/04/2017 15:49

I've had the same.. So now I wait until it gets dark before I run because it makes me feel too self conscious to run in the daytime when I feel everyone is looking at me... even though they probably aren't.

NonsensicalNonsense · 07/04/2017 15:53

Earphones in head down and ignore. If you didnt really hear or know what he was saying how do you know it was pervy though?

NotStoppedAllDay · 07/04/2017 15:54

I've been a regular runner for years, never had this happen

Don't let it drive you into the gym!

Original poster

Runny · 07/04/2017 15:54

Id sort of expect this attitude from an older man, but for someone so young to cat call me like that... I honestly thought that atttiude was dying out.

OP posts:

CakesAreBiscuitsToo · 07/04/2017 15:57

Are you running in London? Doesn't seem to happen regularly to myself or peers. We often run together though, maybethat helps.

Rainydayspending · 07/04/2017 15:57

You'll get a lot of comments that the blessed shits are just misunderstood and not at all utterly vile. They are though. Utterly vile. If only they could be named and shamed. Stocks would be better.

Rainydayspending · 07/04/2017 15:58

And so much disingenuous denial i notice

thetemptationofchocolate · 07/04/2017 15:59

Maybe get one of those gopro cameras and a tabard that says 'smile, you're on camera'?
Horseriders use this combo and I'd imagine the thought of being filmed whist being a twat might stop some of this abuse.
www.amazon.co.uk/Gizapaw-Hi-Viz-Riders-Camera-Tabard/dp/B00PP17QCY?tag=mumsnetforum-21

ScoobyDoosTinklyLaugh · 07/04/2017 15:59

Unfortunately this has happened to me eveyrtime I've gone for a run in daylight. And I feel it's too dodgy at night so I just don't go. Bastards.

CakesAreBiscuitsToo · 07/04/2017 15:59

What do you mean denial? By other runners? I've genuinely not had it very frequently happen - sure the odd time and it's not acceptable behaviour at all. It's base and primitive.

Cinnamon12345 · 07/04/2017 16:02

I painted my front fence, the whistles and calls were relentless. Never done anything out the front since,,

ConfessorKahlan · 07/04/2017 16:06

You mean that you weren't flattered by his appreciation of your female form? You must hate men and be lesbian then.

Thirdload · 07/04/2017 16:09

Ah it's awful. I frequently get the loud beeping just as they pass me and/or "Oi oi!" out of the open window, which makes me jump.
They are the worst on a sunny day, seems to bring out the idiots trying to look big and manly in front of their mates.

actino · 07/04/2017 16:14

Used to happen ALL THE TIME when I was a teenager. Id get shouted at by roofers and honked at by cars. I flip them off and have told many a man to go f*ck himself

Original poster

Runny · 07/04/2017 16:15

No I don't live in London. I live in a very small minded, parochial, racist, homophobic shithole that's about 40 years behind London in terms of attitudes, so that might go some way towards experience explaining it.

OP posts:

MandMand · 07/04/2017 16:16

I seem to go through phases where I don't get catcalled, shouted or beeped at when I'm running for several weeks, and then for some reason it happens several times during one run. I hate hate hate it, but just tend to keep my head down and totally ignore them. As you say, these idiots would probably be outraged if anyone treated their girlfriend or sister like that.

ghostyslovesheets · 07/04/2017 16:17

I've only ever been harassed by teens in the park - 'run Forest run' seems
to be their favourite thing to shout - doesn't bother me anymore

But no one should have to put up with sexist idiots - don't go back to the gym though

Oh and buy warm layers - running in winter is lovely

SunshineOutdoors · 07/04/2017 16:18

I think I might have grown up where you live op

CakesAreBiscuitsToo · 07/04/2017 16:19

Eh well the reason I asked about London is that I wonder if some of the density of population stops otherwise vocal folks from being outspoken! Not because I think the rest of the world is backwards outside of London.

Mighty big assumptions you have made there, OP. That's one big fucking chip on your shoulder.

CakesAreBiscuitsToo · 07/04/2017 16:20

I assume you are being sarcastic. If not, my apologies and why'd you have to ask.

Original poster

Runny · 07/04/2017 16:24

Chip on my shoulder? How so? Because I'd like to go for a run in peace?

OP posts:

CakesAreBiscuitsToo · 07/04/2017 16:27

No because I assumed you were being sarcastic about the backwardness of where you live!

Is it really that bad?

Of course you should be able to run without being verbally assaulted- it's appalling behaviour! They should be named and shamed as said upthread.

TheBiscuitStrikesBack · 07/04/2017 16:30

This has never happened to me. Not sure why it's bothering me that it hasn't. Poor display of feminism from me!!

Original poster

Runny · 07/04/2017 16:39

No, it really is very parochial and insular here. I do wonder if it my experince would be different in somehwere more cosmopolitan?

OP posts:

kittykarate · 07/04/2017 16:39

I'm a fat lass, so when I used to run I got a lot of the wrong sort of attention. There were 3 main types of hassle

'Helpful' comments. Run Forrest Run. Pick your knees up etc.
Catcalling and jeering from cars of young lads, white van men. These would often slow down as they drove past me for maximum impact.
Freaky blokes on bikes trying to follow me and talk to me and refusing to accept that I was far too busy trying to run to make polite smalltalk.

One of the last runs I did outdoors I had all of the above plus some charming yahoos throwing plastic bottles and litter at me out of their car.

Even wearing headphones and keeping my head down wasn't any protection, all I could do was try not to react and pretend it wasn't happening in the hope that they didn't get any satisfaction. Which is a crappy response, but the only one I had.

Flip

1 2 3