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Original poster

To think that packed lunch containing a cold happy meal could be due to poverty?

466 replies

blubberball · 29/03/2017 09:55

I saw on the news the other day, a story about school packed lunches. At one school, they looked in a child's lunchbox, and found a cold happy meal. People have obviously been angered by that, and are accusing the parents of being lazy. The first thought that came to my mind was that they couldn't afford to waste the food from the day before. I know that the particular primary school they looked at is in a very poor area. I just felt sorry for them.

OP posts:
SleepFreeZone · 29/03/2017 11:23

Agreed about the chaotic household. We all know that it takes a lot of organisation to get the house running smoothly with packed lunches and homework, after school activities and work life. I'm often looking around for decent lunch ingredients if I'm a day behind with food shopping and the fresh stuff has been eaten.

Personally I wouldn't dream of putting a cold happy meal in a lunchbox, mainly because my kids have never eaten one hot BUT I do give them chocolate and they don't like hummus, so I'm not MN perfect by any means. It's whatever is standard fare in your house and some houses do exist on take aways and shit food generally.

vaginasuprise · 29/03/2017 11:25

An awful lot of assumptions and judgement given there was so little information in the Original post.

There could be many reasons why.

Parent finds uneaten lunch at the end of the day, perhaps this has been happening for a while. Asks child what they DO want to eat for their lunch. Child says Burger and fries. Parent points out it would be disgusting, child is adamant, parent does it to prove a point.

It's unlikely but possible.

There isn't enough information!

Gileswithachainsaw · 29/03/2017 11:26

No one has said it's not neglect full. Nor have they said it's OK.

But there are reasons many of which are poverty related.

Education
Time
Money
Hell eveb being home
Access to cheap food at a time when you aren't working
Not being in emergency accommodation/women's shelter

There are also scenarios which also mean thy temporarily food is perhaps not the immediate focus.

Not good obviously and is it acceptable anyone is in this situation? No but shaming I'm a newspaper and cutting off someone's hope for assistance doesn't help.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 29/03/2017 11:27

My first thought was the kid was probably incredibly picky/fussy. Not poverty.

DCs recently had a play date round. I ask parents what they'd like for lunch. The DCs don't / won't eat ham/cheese / tuna.

Cool I'll do jam sandwiches then.

Nope. DCs don't like jam and I cant do chocolate spread as they don't like chocolate either Confused

I'm also wondering if it was a sly dig at the school because when DCs used to be packed lunches. I once got told I was putting too much in their packed lunch. Sandwich , crisps, fruit and yoghurt with a cereal bar and a drink. So I toned it down and just put in sandwiches fruit yoghurt and a drink and apparently a couple of the dinner staff were concerned the DCs didn't appear to have enough in their lunch Hmm

Make your mind up! 😂

Vandree · 29/03/2017 11:28

And no she wasn't a neglectful or lazy parent. She was trying to get through a f*cked up situation the best way she could and keeping her children safe the best way she could. It can happen to any of us so quickly your head would spin. And for them they were unbelievably lucky that the homelessness wasn't long term and they are back on their feet through the sheer perseverance of my SIL. I would challenge anyone who called her lazy or neglectful . I admire her so much.

NoCapes · 29/03/2017 11:29

Vandree I'm quite shocked your SIL was given McDonalds vouchers, when I was in a similar situation I was given Asda vouchers, which just seems to make much more sense because I needed formula and nappies etc
I bet she never wanted to see a McDonalds meal ever again when she got on her feet

AwaywiththePixies27 · 29/03/2017 11:30

Vandree agreed. I became an expert at the tinned meals and puddings for under £2 when I'd first split from the ex.

Allington · 29/03/2017 11:30

But this needs to be viewed in a broader context, which we're all lacking - what does the child normally bring in? How is their attendance? Do they turn up in clean uniform most days? What's their family life like?

Just "child brings cold McD's for lunch" is very attention-grabbing, but without the context we really have no idea - could be anything from 'it was a treat from yesterday and they fell asleep' through 'we spent the night at A&E and this was the only thing on the way' through 'child's teenage sibling bought this for his lunch because parents were nowhere to be seen'.

This.

I've sent DD in with the other half of a burger (admittedly not MacDonalds if that makes it better Grin and cold chips. I'd hate it, she likes it.

On the other hand today (usual type of packed lunch) it was a wrap with grated cheese and carrot, a small pot of last night's veggie stir fry, a yoghurt, 2 pieces of fruit, some cherries tomatoes and a small biscuit.

Depends on the overall diet, not a single meal.

EnthusiasmIsDisturbed · 29/03/2017 11:30

No

Is the parent/s lazy well yes but the cause of this isn't so easy to define

I work in some areas and as soon as I get out of the car the atmosphere of depression/despondency hits you more work and investment in these areas will change people's outlook when they feel more positive they engage more with everyday life

But you will always get people who are lazy becuase they want to be

AwaywiththePixies27 · 29/03/2017 11:32

I bet she never wanted to see a McDonalds meal ever again when she got on her feet

NoCapes I remember my Mum being on the bones of her arse one time after moving and paying all the removal costs. We ate pot noodles and bread and butter every day for a fortnight. That was 15 years ago now and I still can't stand the smell of them now.

bonbonours · 29/03/2017 11:35

Jaynesworld you read my mind. Even if you only have £1 in your pocket you could buy a loaf of basics bread and a pack of ham which would do a week's worth of sandwiches.

Even the cheapest form of prepared food is always going to be more expensive that preparing food yourself.

It's about making choices. I think the same about all the publicity about breakfast clubs because 'some families can't afford to give their children breakfast.' Again, a loaf of basic bread plus a jar of basics jam costs less than £1 and would provide a breakfast (albeit not the most healthy or filling) for a child for a week. I am willing to be those families who 'can't afford it', spent £1 on something they deemed more important than giving their child breakfast.

BeaderBird · 29/03/2017 11:35

Allington, but was it a 'wholemeal' wrap?

AlexanderHamilton · 29/03/2017 11:36

I doubt her sister was given Mcdonald's vouchers by any agency. She probably got them from Mcdonalds themselves who often run promotions where you get a free portion of fries or 6 nuggets, the aim being that most customers will then make more purchases.

5moreminutes · 29/03/2017 11:36

Actually a few days ago DD (And DH) had Frikkadel in their lunch boxes, which kind of are basically ball shaped burgers, along with other things... They love them, and yes eat them cold ... Didn't give them to the DSs because they don't like them, but bought them specifically for DD and DH's lunches...

Frecklesfrodo123 · 29/03/2017 11:36

I think it's quite possible that the parent may have a mental illness and have been in a manic/crisis state.

Vandree · 29/03/2017 11:37

Nocapes, I think because she was in the city centre so no supermarkets or way to get shopping back to the hotel it was fast food vouchers as the mcdonalds was literally underneath the hotel. I am pretty sure there were other vouchers and weekly payments paid (not a lot) but they were gone pretty quick and you could be left with mcdonalds. I know other hotels were set up to provide meals, it was just the luck of the draw. It was a shock to find out how they had been living for months, it was kept so quiet. But she knew offers of places to stay would mean longer on the housing list and losing benefits. They have a lovely home now.

Sorry to hear you were in a similar situation. Made me realise how lucky we were even at the bad times. And DN loves nothing more than meat and loads of veg now, eats piles of it and gets so excited with a roast dinner. No mcdonalds again for a looong time I think

AlexanderHamilton · 29/03/2017 11:38

IS that to me Beader? (autocorrect?). No, I can very occasionally get ds to eat wholemeal but I don't risk it at school.

MadMags · 29/03/2017 11:43

If you had no money in your pocket but had a voucher for a fast food chain at 8am in the morning what would you do? What would you do for your child if it meant them eating or not? Happy meal or starve your child? I'd pick a happy meal thanks

From the happy meal menu alone:

Crispy chicken wrap with what looks like an attempt at lettuce.

Carrot sticks.

Bag of apple and grapes.

Milk/water.

Not great - not a burger and chips.

justnowords · 29/03/2017 11:45

Tbh I wanna be compassionate and have sympathy for the parents (I certainly do for the child) but I just cant get my head around anyone thinking that a cold happy meal was a good idea. I can't think of any reasonable excuse to justify it. Substance abuse? Then the child should be removed. Poverty? Like people say, its £2.50 for a happy meal which could easily be spend on other things. Laziness? Well thats just plain old neglect. Stupidy/didnt know any better? That would worry me and wonder what else the kid was subjected to through ignorance. I find it hard to believe that anyone is stupid enough to think a cold happy meal is an acceptable school lunch.

Starlight2345 · 29/03/2017 11:48

I haven't read all 7 pages..

However I am aware of a family who gained a lot of weigh..One of the DC was in hospital with a tumor. They were living on ready meals but mostly take aways.. Thank fully child is Currently well and weight issues are been addressed.

My point been we know nothing about this situation as someone else has said it is part of a picture.. We have bought a KFC buckets before and ate the chicken the next day..Not in a packed lunch but it is very easy to judge with so little facts.

SaucyJack · 29/03/2017 11:50

I was just thinking that Madmags.

Even if McDonalds was one single place that that parent could have bought lunch on that particular day (and we're ignoring the option to purchase a school meal), then there are still several more appropriate choices on the menu for something that looks like a "normal" packed lunch than a cheeseburger and fries.

MrsHathaway · 29/03/2017 11:51

How would they get to Tesco?

Vandree, I was waiting for someone to ask this question. Thank you!

It's all very well costing £2.50 of nutritious packed lunch from a particular supermarket, but a lot harder to do so from what's available in the only shop within walking distance which in many areas could be a Bargain Booze Extra, or Shell garage.

I agree with pps that a cold Happy Meal is a shitty lunch, but I think poverty - which doesn't just mean "lack of money" - is as likely a cause as deliberate neglect. And it's precisely why we have universal FSM in infants in England.

MrsHathaway · 29/03/2017 11:54

And bugger me, the difference in my DCs' lunchboxes the day before and the day after I've been to the supermarket Blush

Some days it's "Right, fuck, what is there? That'll have to do" and other days it's lovingly hand-carved carrot roses and organic hummus.

I also forgot to mention the outlay required to provide eg pasta salad which needs a little tupperware pot and a fork you can afford to lose.

BorpBorpBorp · 29/03/2017 11:56

If the happy meal was going to be my child's only meal of the day, I would want it to be burger and fries, not chicken wrap and carrot sticks.

PortiaCastis · 29/03/2017 11:59

How do we know this item of so called news is true??