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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that calling hair 'mousy' is an insult, not a description of the colour

194 replies

JustT · 28/03/2017 16:28

My daughter has beautiful long hair that I call 'golden brown'. It was blonde as a baby but has got darker as she's got older and she's now 8. She's always been really happy with her hair colour and I'm pleased because I remember my own mum putting lemon juice and 'sun-in' in my hair when I was a kid to desperately try and keep it blonde for longer. I want my daughter to be happy with her hair as it is. So I was a bit upset when she was having her hair cut last week and the hairdresser said that her hair was 'mousy'. This doesn't sound like a colour to me, it actually sounds like an insult and a way of saying that it is an unattractive colour. Since then my daughter's actually said that she doesn't like having 'mousy' hair and that it isn't a nice colour. I'm so upset as she's never expressed this before and I want her to have confidence in her appearance. Not sure what to do now or whether to speak to the hairdresser about it. Surely she should know that this isn't a nice way to describe a little girl's hair, or even a neutral description of colour. It's an insult right?

OP posts:
Venchi · 29/03/2017 13:30

I love 'mink' I'm going to start telling people my hair colour is mink. Why did i never think of that!

IrianOfW · 29/03/2017 13:30

It's a daft word really as most mice are a kind of silvery colour or very light golden brown, or flecked like a wild rabbit. Not may people have hair that colour. Quite pretty really. I think it has been used in the past in a slightly pejorative way but I don't think that is how most people mean it.

almondpudding · 29/03/2017 13:34

Wild rabbit brown sounds lovely.

kali110 · 29/03/2017 17:51

wellclearly no a lot of people don't think it's a negative term so saying it's clearly a negative thing isn't true.

Dozer · 29/03/2017 18:41

It is negative, as evidenced by that dictionary definition.

lljkk · 29/03/2017 21:13

In my household, mice are generally the colour of spewed up guts & dismembered mammal body.

hellejuice91 · 29/03/2017 21:31

I think some people use it as a insult and some don't.

My natural hair colour is a mousey brown. If someone said that I wouldn't be bothered

I don't dye it because I hate the natural colour I just adore red hair so always have it a varying shade of red

Calling a person a mousey person is a little different though.

SpitefulMidLifeAnimal · 29/03/2017 21:36

I've never heard of "golden brown" before. It sounds a bit pretentious

I've only ever heard the Stranglers song. And I'd rather my hair was the colour of a cute mouse than a bag of heroin.

Illstartexercisingtomorrow · 29/03/2017 21:38

I think it's a horrible term.

OP fwiw if it wasn't this incident then you can be sure that in the not too distant future someone else would have made a comment about your daughter's appearance that would have made her self conscious. It goes hand in hand with being female unfortunately and she is at the age where she will start to understand these comments. Fat, thin, dark, light, tall, freckly, length of hair...blah blah blah. A woman's appearance is public property.

I have a vivid memory of someone asking my about the colour of my hair. It's a very common colour and lovely but it made me so self conscious and it took me up to my mid twenties (and a ton of bleaching and highlighting and awful colouring) to realise that I had a lovely natural colour.

Do what you can to ensure she loves herself regardless of what people say. It's a tough battle though.

Itsnotwhatitseems · 30/03/2017 07:17

this is mouse and its beautiful, I can see why it could also be called golden brown, maybe its mice who should be offended as they are judged to not be a nice colour :)

To think that calling hair 'mousy' is an insult, not a description of the colour
Ethylred · 30/03/2017 07:25

Mousy is a matter-of-fact term. Like grey. I was mousy, am grey, winner all the time. Go me!

Athrawes · 30/03/2017 07:28

Wild rabbit for sure in the future. Maybe elderly wild rabbit, to account for the grey.

Dozer · 30/03/2017 07:28

"Brown" would be matter of fact. "Mousy" is a judgment.

Itsnotwhatitseems · 30/03/2017 07:28

all colour descriptions could have positive or negative connotations depending on your own view point. When people say white blonde it conjurs up Jimmy Saville in my mind and black could make you think of a witch, then there is red/ginger etc so basically anyone could be offended by any term.

GreyMist · 30/03/2017 07:52

Well you learn something new every day. I have used. Pusey brown to describe a hair colour, just as I've used dark, red, Auburn etc etc. I've never intended to insult anyone and never thought the person would be offended by it!

It's just a description.

GreyMist · 30/03/2017 07:53

AutoCorrect didn't like "mousey" brown.

That's what I meant. Not Pusey. That is an insult! Shock

Dozer · 30/03/2017 07:57
Grin
Venchi · 30/03/2017 08:31

pussy brown hair! omg! hilarious.

Venchi · 30/03/2017 08:47

I think it's a fashion thing. All through my twenties I was asked ''why don't you go lighter?'' or ''why don't you go darker?". I had wavy hair too and in the 90s you were only allowed have straight hair! So my hair has always felt wrong. Now it seems fashion allows thick wavy mid brown hair! wey hey!

Richard21 · 27/07/2018 04:22

I am a 65 year old African man. I came to this site when I googled "mouse-coloured hair" to see pictures of such hair, not being 100% sure what it looked like. It is however exactly as I thought, but i had always thought it was a dark shade of blond. I also have long found it the most attractive shade for caucasians , before which brunette was my favourite.

In my opinion, the word mousey always has negative connotations because mice are vermin. It should therefore not be used to describe hair unless the hair is scruffy or unhealthy looking. Mouse-coloured on the other hand refers only to the colour which is a beautiful metallic grey when the hair is healthy.

AjasLipstick · 27/07/2018 04:55

I don't like it either. Because it's also used to describe a boring personality..."she's a bit mousey"

I prefer terms like "Titian red" and "Russet brown" and "Golden brown" and "Dark blonde"

My boring mid-brown hair was called "Chestnut" by my Nan.

FindoGask · 27/07/2018 04:56

Technically it's not an insult but in reality I would avoid using it to describe someone's hair in front of them - it does have unflattering connotations.

FindoGask · 27/07/2018 04:56

Oh bloody hell, zombie thread.

DrPeppersPhD · 27/07/2018 07:30

I personally describe my own mousey brown hair as "that colour you used to get as a kid when you mixed all your poster paints together and ended up being able to see flecks of different colours up close but from a distance it was a disgusting greenish browny grey colour." No, I don't think mouse is an insult, it's a colour.

Cheerbear23 · 27/07/2018 07:36

I understand you op, my DD’s hair could be described as mousy, but I never have. I say it’s light brown. Mousy isn’t a nice description.
However I do think calling it ‘golden brown’ is over egging it a little. I think she’s being set up to be teased if she repeats that.

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