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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To genuinely believe people are much more ruder and 'entitled' these days?

222 replies

Snugglepalace · 28/03/2017 11:41

I may be heading down avenue 'grump old git' these days but people really piss me off recently.
For example, Dh works on the roads and they regularly get abuse from the general public, especially when it come to road closures.
Last week Dh and work mates were working on a road closure when a woman drives up to them demanding that they let her through, 'but the road is closed it says so on the board in front of you!' says Dh. 'No, no that doesn't apply to me I live on this road!' There are no houses on this road, it's a country lane used as a cut through for many.
Anyhow, Dh insists she can not get through, she argues with him, turns her steering wheel and drives right passed into road closure.
Thing is, the reason the road is closed is due to the fact there is a sodding great big hole in road which she proceeds to drive straight into getting car stuck in process Grin
Spends the next 4 hours sulking on grass verge waiting for recovery truck!
Wtf is wrong with folk?

OP posts:
Lulabell1979 · 28/03/2017 22:56

Yep. I work in commercial property and on our managed estates with parking restrictions (the types of place that are clearly no parking - big signs etc) our security guards frequently get their feet run over by people they ask politely to move! On purpose. People are ridiculous.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 28/03/2017 22:59

@ZebraOwl - it is baffling that people can't understand that anyone taking a group of children round somewhere busy would prefer to keep them together in a group, and will cut through an obvious group like your Brownies. I don't think I have ever been in such a hurry that I couldn't walk round a group of kids rather than forcing a swathe through them.

arghpedrevan · 28/03/2017 23:12

Someone I know has quit their job after 7 months because they haven't moved up the corporate ladder yet. This is their first job out of university and they genuinely believe their degree entitles them to move up the ladder faster than other people because they've worked hard for their degree, are overqualified for the job and sees no value in excelling.

Seriously!?

buttercup54321 · 28/03/2017 23:23

Serve the woman right' Karma at its best. I would have stood and laughed at her.

WelshMoth · 29/03/2017 06:02

I find some of the pupils I teach to be entitled.

"What? You want me to do this in my free time? I work hard enough does he bollocks in school."

Said in Year 11 Parent's Evening about his lack of revision, whilst Mum looked at him adoringly.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/03/2017 06:10

Lingo I can't think of one person who would be okay with an eight year old telling them they are wrong - however politely. And she will encounter people who find that obnoxious and will tell her so.

ZebraOwl · 29/03/2017 07:13

SDTG
It does seem a bit befuddling to me as well but you see it all the time, people charging through groups of primary school children and Brownies/Cubs. Sometimes you do find yourself trying to weave round a mob of children, that is different. And groups of foreign students are the actual worst & I've been known to properly tell off French & German speaking ones when they clart up entire pavements & drift into the road. I was once picked up & carried off the tube 2 stops after mine after being swarmed by a mob of them one summer when trying to get off. They literally pushed me & the other person trying to get off back into the carriage; next stop I couldn't physically get through them & the one after I was going to try the other door when some MASSIVE bloke picked me up and just charged through them with a shout of "excuse me" that Brian Blessed would have envied. He did apologise for just grabbing me like that & was v nice & not creepy about it. (Yes, my entire life is ridiculous & weird. I'm the person who gets left in charge of a Shetland pony outside a big London Theatre before it appears in a ballet because the owner & I have mutual friends - but we'd never met - & he reckoned I knew horses well enough & the pony in question seemed to quite like me. And yes, I expected people to go round us, yes, yes I did. Wink

Mind you, on our the way to the Zoo last year one woman actually decided to insert herself into the middle of our group because she wanted to get to Regent's Park & she heard one of the Brownies ask me how far it was to the Zoo! That was a new one on me... if she'd asked if she minded her following us as she wasn't sure of the way it wouldn't have been so
weird, but just shoving into the middle &... maybe hoping we wouldn't notice this random woman lurking (& she was fully lurking) amidst our Brownies was just bananas. Am sure she didn't mean the girls any harm, obviously, or I'd have done something other than say she could follow behind us or I'd direct her to the park but she couldn't just go plonking herself in the middle of the children like that, but it was just... weird...

ZebraOwl · 29/03/2017 07:15

Huh. Something a bit weird happened with my post there. It seems to have edited itself by putting the last paragraph onto the end of the first. That's... special.

pasturesgreen · 29/03/2017 07:35

On way to work the other day. Man gets on the train wheeling a fucking enormous trunk suitcase.

Now, I appreciate he might have had no other choice than getting exactly that early morning commuter train, but a bit of consideration wouldn't have gone amiss.

He banged said trunk suitcase on loads of people's shins, myself included, without uttering a single apology all the way.

Had the cheek to mutter at some point 'Do pay attention, I have a suitcase there' Confused

God, I hate fucking entitled smartarses people!

Crazypetlady · 29/03/2017 07:58

I find people are so entitled. People of all ages though. If you let someone pass even though it was your 'right of way' or hold a door open I find a lot just look at you. I do shout THANK YOU is polite now. My son isnt two yet but we are still working on teaching him to be considerate.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/03/2017 08:12

Oh and people who appoint themselves the parking police are just as entitled as the people they berate. And they look far more ridiculous.

ringlingsisters · 29/03/2017 08:15

Agree with posters who made points:
Big business bending over backwards to accommodate arsey or bonkers customer behaviour because they don't want negative feedback on social media.

People not being called out on their entitled/bad behaviour because others don't want to have to deal with the fallout.

Stupid/unkind acts being filmed for social media and receiving 150,999,555,889,993 likes which appears to encourage shitty behaviour by others.

Vacuous celebrities who embody entitled behaviour and have kids thinking they can become rich and famous by doing not very much or behaving like a tantrumming toddler - we appear to have no or very few genuine role models for young people. We need more Tim Peakes and fewer Joey Essexes.

Pseudonym99 · 29/03/2017 08:17

Perhaps those in charge are more authoritarian and dictorial these days, and people are resisting it.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/03/2017 08:17

Crazy There are plenty of reasons why someone wouldn't thank you, including rudeness, shyness etc. I get it is annoying. I'm always vaguely embarrassed when someone moves out of my way or holds the door so I kind of mutter thanks.

Surely being considerate also means not expecting people to be thankful - if that is an issue, then perhaps you should stop doing it!

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/03/2017 08:19

More authoritarian and dictatorial? Really? I can think of many many more authoritarian and dictatorial governments etc from history

WateryTart · 29/03/2017 08:21

In the hierarchy of entitlement the school run parents are way above anyone else.

Allowing DCs on scooters to take the legs out of other pedestrians.

Walking 2 abreast with massive buggies and not allowing people to get past them or pass in the opposite direction without going into the road.

But worst of all are the pavement parking, drive blocking idiots who arrive half an hour before school finishes to ensure their darling doesn't have to walk more than a few yards to the car. Pavements are for people, not cars.

I love it when the PCOSs ticket the lot of them.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/03/2017 08:25

And the mothers (always mothers!) who get arsey if you as an adult don't wait for the green man on a crossing because they expect everyone to help 'model good behaviour' to their children. I always enjoy the loud PA parenting that follows though Grin

guinea36 · 29/03/2017 09:00

Playing music without headphones on your phone so everyone can hear it is a pet hate. It really seems to have become a thing in the last couple of years pretty much everywhere - almost as if people no longer consider it rude! Stayed in hospital recently and a patient and her partner were playing tunes loudly on their laptop, even when other patients around them were clearly ill and in pain. The nurse eventually asked them to tune it down but not to put in headphones!

Hygellig · 29/03/2017 09:31

We stopped at a service station on the A34. A car with no blue badge pulled up in the disabled parking space and two young able-bodied men got out. So I asked them if they were disabled and they said no. Then they said they were just going for a piss and hadn't I got anything better to do. I hope they get a ticket some day if they do it again. Everyone else had managed to park in a normal space.

Portia would you mind sharing or PMing me the name of your holiday let? I promise not to wee on the sofa or demand fish and chip deliveries!

Snugglepalace · 29/03/2017 09:46

I used to work for a Podiatry department in the NHS. It had a 3 month waiting list for treatment.
We would regularly get little old ladies ring in saying the had been referred a couple of months back and as they were in such pain they wanted to check if an appointment would be given to them soon. I'd have to tell them (hated doing so) that they were still on the list but would get an appointment in due time. They would always say OK thank you dear, never complaining.
However, then you'd get people ring in (already aggressive) saying, I was referred a week ago and I've not heard anything yet, when is my appointment??!! I'd calmly explain about the waiting list. No, no that's not good enough, put me through to your manager. After putting the call through, my manager would walk into my office and say, could you please put this patient to the top of the waiting list. WTF Angry

OP posts:
NotYetAYummyMummy · 29/03/2017 09:48

That's hilarious op Grin
Karma at work right there!

NotYetAYummyMummy · 29/03/2017 09:48

Oops - that was for the op statement not your most recent post!

LouKout · 29/03/2017 09:49

People regularly tell others on here to go to Drs or dentists and shout and refuse to leave until you get an immediate appt.

People do actually do this. I work for a dentist and people do come in thinking you must squeeze them in sooner than the appt you gave them on phone and then give you abuse if you don't.

Closedenv · 29/03/2017 10:14

If you actually look at the faces of such people you will soon start to see the same look, just start looking. It's quite sad really
the look is never one of being truly happy even when they try to look smug it makes you feel pity for them especially when their look is one of I've won, because it's then a look of, this is my one 'achievement' and the only way I can pretend to myself I've won.

ZebraOwl · 29/03/2017 10:45

WateryTart
When I Rule The World repeat offenders will have their scooters impounded. I once had a smallish child stop a trike-type-thing by crashing into the back of my legs. On a really wide path, oceans of space all around. Turn around, no adult anywhere in sight. Wait. Still no adult. Child gawping at me. Move back a bit & bend down so not looming but making eye contact (can't crouch due to stage of recovery from knee reconstruction). Ask, v gently, if small boy will apologise, as while I know he didn't mean to, hitting me like that hurt me. Small boy says sorry, I say it's ok & to enjoy the rest of his day, FINALLY see parent heading over, small boy & I say goodbye (I get a "nice lady", so pretty sure he's not traumatised by the experience) & I walk on. Don't get very far before boy's father flings himself in front of me and starts screaming in my face about me intimidating his child. How dare I talk to his son! It was an accident! I pointed out that was why I'd asked him to apologise, as that is what one does when one accidentally injures someone else, but he just kept screaming it was an accident & his son was 4 & shouldn't have to apologise! Right up in my face, towering over me - he must have been almost a foot taller than me, and given my size, possibly 3 times my weight - and accusing me of intimidating his child. Apparently irony wasn't his thing. Small boy began to wail about his father's ravings & he stormed off announcing "you've made him cry now too! Pleased with yourself are you?!" (As previously noted, my entire life is ridiculous.)

Livia
I once gave out roundly to a PA-parenter. Well, as much as I could with the limited voice I had at the time (which was part of the issue). She sort of... puddled. It was hugely satisfying. Bwahahaha!

guinea36
Blargh. It's hideous isn't it. I'm sometimes tempted to blast classical music back at them & see how they like it... how grim in hospital though: wards I've been on staff have always been firm with people about using headphones - though there was the one time Baroness Munchausen was blasting the 7/7 Memorial Service & it descended into a row I thought might get physical. I got treated to the hilarious insult of "they treat you like a princess because you went to Cambridge - that's the only reason the dietitian sees you! I am the sick one! I need to see her! But she ignores me because you went to Cambridge!" That's an alumni benefit they've been keeping very quiet. There was I thinking it was because of the NJ tube & complex dietary needs & refeeding issues thanks to my grumpy GI tract. As indeed were the gastro team. But no... (Girl in the bed opposite me was A Princess because she was blond. Oh & both of us got Special Treatment because we were Irish. Again, who knew...?). She was possibly the pinnacle of entitled actually - anything anyone else on in the bay had, she wanted. I had to start having paracetamol alongside my normal pain meds because she'd been told everyone had to have it before they were allowed stronger painkillers. If I got IV paracetamol, she'd have to have hers IV. Bed next to me had to have an x-ray on the ward, nothing would serve but that she must have the same - greatly to her fury, however, while she could get written up for the x-ray, she couldn't get them to do it on the ward. She came in with no dietary requirements but developed all sorts of things during her stay. She tried to manipulate her blood sugars when her metaclopromide was stopped as unnecessary & she felt they weren't being checked often enough. She started claiming she couldn't swallow (her food was going from her tray because it was "dissolving in her mouth") because she wanted a feeding tube like mine. She was told she mustn't use the various braces/supports she'd bought herself as she didn't need them & they were damaging her joints, but they kept finding them on her (even though they were put out of her reach & she insisted she was totally helpless & not only unable to move from bed but had to be washed by staff & helped to use the bedpan etc). If staff were dealing with another patient in the bay she'd ring for them. She actually rang so much that staff were slow to answer our bay - if it was urgent for someone else I'd go & find a nurse/HCA because invariably "I thought it was Baroness Munchausen". They took her bell away a couple of times because she was misusing it so badly. She clearly did have issues - wanting to be ill & trying to make yourself look ill are problems. But bed-blocking & demanding care you don't need & preventing other patients from receiving the care they do - all while being an utter cow to people - mean my sympathy expired before my stay did...

SnugglePalace & LouKout
Those people are The Worst. I hate seeing people getting all shouty at admin people/receptionists/secretaries in hospitals & other healthcare settings because, um, they can't do magic, basically. Do they think you're withholding appointments for kicks? Or keeping them for friends or a shadowy network of Powerful People. It is rubbish being ill. It can be scary & it can be frustrating to have to wait for Answers &/or Help. Or, in the case of A Certain Gastro Department, for them to learn to cope with the concept of booking follow-up appointments. But shouting at people isn't ok. (SnugglePalace, how do you resist the temptation to book the Superobnoxious & then bump them at the last minute for one of the little old ladies who has become Urgent?)

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