MIL lack of praise

[damewithaname]

AIBU about MILs lack of praise with regards to the good I do in raising my children, her grandchildren? We don't have the best relationship and I've continually tried to make it work. Through the years, I've received very little praise from her: no much praise that I'm a good wife and take care of her sons and his interests or that I'm a good mother to her grandchildren. She has always been quick to tell me that I'm controlling and a low life yet I have never done anything to be considered a low life??? I see how the other womend in my family get praised by their MIL and it hurts that mine doesn't say it to me. Anyone else have this? Am I being self centered?

It's seems your MIL can barely contain her contempt for you.

Does she deserve any respect herself?

She's calling you these names because you let her get away with it. Tell her on no uncertain terms this is unacceptable. If she wants to see your children or come to your house, she will respect you. I don't know why she praises bil and gf. Maybe he's her favourite or she's jealous of you or you're so much more competent than them. She may be doing this to deliberately upset you. Remember if she's in your house, she abides by your rules. The next time she is like that, show her the door or leave depending on whose house you are in. And think seriously before allowing her access to your children when she's by herself.

OP, are there cultural reasons stopping you from speaking your mind?

Oh I see she apologised. That's something. She's not as bad as my mother. Anything for a nasty remark about dh or me. My brother is oh so perfect.

I'd not expect praise for being a good wife or parent, surely that's a basic in life and to be expected?

I don't understand you wanting praise. Praise for what exactly? My MiL doesn't praise me either, nor do I expect her to. She doesn't call me a low life either though. That's terrible!

Hus relationship isn't that great with them either. He says they favour the other siblings and always have. He says it bugged him a lot in the younger years and it still get a to him at times. She thinks her relationship with my Hubby is great.

Praise for bringing up your children? Praise for supporting the man you love? Ermmmm, never heard of this before and it is very cringe.

I get the feeling you might be hard work if this is what you expect from your MIL?

It sounds extremity petty if I'm honest

Mother

I'd read the thread if I were you

Not okay that she calls you a low life.
But bit odd to expect praise.
I'd find it quite patronising