To think that a minute's silence was not appropriate in school.

[Easternmom]

My 2 DD (7&8) came home from school as told me that they had a minute's silence for 'the thing that happened in London where people died'. Someone in the reception class had disrupted it with a burp - so it was a story to tell me- otherwise I may not have known. However- they didn't give them any context or explain what happened etc- it seems it was tacked onto their prayers at the end of assembly. We do listen to the radio a lot and as they are older we have had several chats about things they hear in the news or at school. However, I feel that if the school are going to bring this up- they really should let parents know or give the kids time to talk about it. None if that happened. Also, very weird for the reception class- and even yr 1& 2 to have been there as they are, in my opinion, too young to properly understand and it just would have scared my kids at that age. Am I being over sensitive? They have never had a minute's silence for anything else, so it also seems odd to single out this awful attack out and ignore others.

Perhaps they didn't go into detail as they assumed parents would or wouldn't so a silence was innocuous

YABU

It was one minute. That's all.

Some children would have heard about the incident at home, other would have heard about it at school from friends.

It is a thoughtful thing to do to hold the minutes silence and I suspect they gave some context when they did it.

If your dc weren't upset by it then I don't see what your AIBU actually is?

organised group memorializing is such BS. If people feel they want to mark anything in any way then they should do that. Forcing everyone to observe a silence is such nonsense even when the people being forced actually know/understand what has happened. Doing it to 4 yo is doubly pointless.

I'd be a bit perturbed if I wasn't able to provide ds with some context. But that's because he knows I'm going to London with his baby sister tomorrow and I wouldn't want him worrying about me. I'd prefer to explain to him what happened and give him some context to reassure him I'll be fine. No idea if he knows about it or not.

I think for year R I would want parents to be told so they could explain at home. I haven't told mine about it.

Do primaries usually have a minute's silence for other occasions, eg November 11th?

Dulcimena Yes

YABU. It was very important that they did Imo.

None of the schools my DDs have been to have ever brought this up with me. Just done it. I have no issue with it at all and think it absolutely appropriate.

My DD1 was in Year 1 when 9/11 happened. They were watching it live on TV at school pick up time. Again, it wouldn't have occurred to me to have an issue with that. After all, we had it on at home too.

I have never been one to shield them from the news, and the minute's silence helps teach respect.

@derxa Thanks.

In that case OP YABU.

too young to properly understand and it just would have scared my kids

You said they just had a minute silence and didn't explain it. So how could being quiet for a minute have scared them?

Most children would be too young to really understand everything, but doesn't mean they can't show a minute silence in respect for those that lost their lives.

I don't think a detailed explanation was necessary, just marking a minute silence for the tragedy that happened in our Capital city yesterday where people lost their lives.

YABU

I think you're probably right. I don't think small children (under 10s) can meaningfully understand this and there's a strong possibility that some will be panicked - I'd include some teenagers in that.

As for the burp, it could have been a real one or it could have been a child who didn't realise the solemnity of the occasion, messing about. It's hard to tell. What are you going to do it that case? Tell the child off or let it go? I think the adults are the ones who've created that problem.

It's why a minute's applause is sometimes used at football matches rather than a minute's silence - it minimises the risk of people spoiling it.

It's tricky. In principle I believe in engaging children (in an age-appropriate way) on all sorts of current affairs matters, and I do so with my nearly 5yo.

OTOH, the Westminster thing I have deliberately avoided and would be quite upset if he learned of it at school. I work opposite the HoP and he knows that and would worry, not in a small or constructive or 'learning about the world' way but in a very real and major and persistent and destructive way.

I do find it a little strange in that I don't remember having any school events marking IRA bombs, or Lockerbie, or the Hungerford massacre, in the 80s

We did and regular bomb and fire drills

Yanbu. A minute's silence is for grown ups, not children.

The children, even in year R, talk about such things and generally up the horror as they talk. Or at any rate my dc and their classmates did.

It's good to have the discussions out in the open at school.

An estimated 1650 people died in the UK on March 22nd. Fetishizing the deaths of 4 of those people does nothing but give oxygen to the terrorists.

I worry how many would be terrorists are even now rubbing their hands with glee that all you need to get 48 hours solid coverage of your cause and everyone down to and including 4 yos forced into awareness of your actions and message is grab a knife and jump in your car.

The way we have responded to this event is beyond stupid and totally off the self-harm chart.

YANBU One minute's silence in primary school is utterly pointless.

OP Would you object to the minutes silence held in November to commemorate Armistice Day?

I was annoyed that our DC's schools did not mention it at all in assembly. They are both at London schools. It's a good chance to give them a positive and reassuring message about how these things are very rare, that they shouldn't feel scared, and to reflect on the heroism of all those good people (police, medical and members of the public) who were so very brave. You can take a moment to remember all those who were affected and their families but a minute's silence seems a bit contrived for primary school age kids.

A minute's silence is also for children. They will never learn to respect it as teenagers and adults if they didn't begin as children. A good and respectful discipline to learn, and from as early an age as possible.

We did it in primary school. That was in the seventies.

As a Quaker, I would say that learning to experience silence is - in itself - a valuable thing. Increasingly so in a world which becomes more and more full of noisy distractions.

We should not be scared of silence. Because that is like being scared of experiencing our own selves. (Possibly a great many of us - adults - are scared of precisely that.)

I think it's perfectly reasonable to have a minutes silence with the explanation ' we are having a minutes silence in memory of the people who died in the London attack/ incident' , which sounds like what they did . Some people won't want their children told much info and anyone who wants their children to know more can explain it themselves . It obviously didn't bother your DC as they only told you because of the interruption .