Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put DS in his room and shut the door?

65 replies

Aliveinwanderland · 09/03/2017 02:07

The other day I joked about putting him in a cupboard during the day. Tonight I am serious. He went to bed at 7, woke at 9 and was fed. Woke again at 10 and was fed. Woke again at 12 and is still wide awake. He is grumbling and no amount of sticking his dummy in and stroking his hair is sending him to sleep.

I'm so tempted to put him in his cot in his room and shut the door. Just for an hour so I can sleep. He will cry, but I can't go on much longer. DH is away until Monday and I've had 4 months of waking every 2 hours on a good night and being up constantly on a bad one.

There is nothing wrong with him, he just won't sleep.

OP posts:
Original poster
Aliveinwanderland · 09/03/2017 08:14

I will try some formula again tonight if he will take it from me.

I'm also tempted to try putting him down in his cot in his room tonight rather than his crib in my room. I wonder if I'm waking him sometimes turning over in bed.

OP posts:
Trifleorbust · 09/03/2017 08:17

I moved the crib to the base of the bed and she started sleeping 7-3 or sometimes even longer. That was a huge relief!

Trifleorbust · 09/03/2017 08:19

Definitely try it. I bought hungrier babies milk. She doesn't like it yet but we are giving an ounce or two regularly so she gets used to the taste. It might help to supplement the breast milk so that he stays full for longer.

Original poster
Aliveinwanderland · 09/03/2017 08:20

He is getting too big for the crib anyway- it's a bedside one so with 3 sides he is ok but if I put the side up he is very squished.

Last night he was in my bed all night.

OP posts:
Lunalovepud · 09/03/2017 08:21

Hi alive, you have my absolute sympathy - DC1 has always been a terrible sleeper and it does make you go a bit loopy!

Suggest that you get some people over to help if you can - friends or parents - you'll feel like a new woman if you can get 4 consecutive hours sleep... Sounds amazing doesn't it?! Even if they take baby out for a walk or go to lunch and take baby with them... It's a wrench to have the baby away from you but it will really do you so much good to get some rest.

Also plan in your night when DH takes the baby so there is light at the end of the tunnel. I know you say baby doesn't take the bottle easily and it would be a difficult night for them both but that's life with a new baby - you're not exactly having a brilliant time every year night are you?

Try to get out if you can - the last thing you need at the moment is to feel more alone and isolated.

I'm not trying to push formula over breastfeeding - your feeding and choices are absolutely yours and feel free to ignore this but I want to give you a tip in case it works for you - did wonders for DC1 at about the same age...

Hungry. Baby. Formula. I used to give a couple off feeds of this stuff before bedtime so DC1 was all nice and full and eye rollingly milk drunk then dive into bed pronto as soon as he was in his cot. At least 3 hours sleep - often more. He even slept through a couple of times! Might help you, might not, but leaving it here in case it's worth a try for you guys.

Good luck and I hope you get some rest today.

Flowerydems · 09/03/2017 08:21

I'll admit I don't answer every grumble or cry. Ds1 was in casts when he was born for clubfoot so we couldn't do anything to ease his discomfort so just had to settle him as best we could and move on.
We're on our third and while it's not controlled crying if she's screaming we'll answer but not before.
Me and dh have a system that he takes the shift from bedtime til midnight and 6am til leaving for work so maybe that would be better when your oh is home? Gives you 5 hours at night and a couple of hours in the morning.
I feel for you I can't cope with broken sleep. Have you maybe tried formula, I know I'm a heather formula feeder but he's maybe hungry, we're on hungry baby formula and the difference in how dd sleeps is amazing

Nousernameforme · 09/03/2017 08:22

When you are exhausted everything seems insurmountable . Focus on getting through this time when dh is away first. bring his crib downstairs maybe so when he falls asleep on you in the day you can lower him into that lock doors and get a couple hours kip then on sofa. Try not to fall asleep with him on you.
This too will pass. He isn't going to be waking every 45 mins at 18 years old so at some point he will figure out sleep you just have to hold onto sanity until he does.

StarlingMurderation · 09/03/2017 08:27

This isn't going to be of immediate help, but do you have Homestart in your area? It's a charity that matches you with a lovely kind DBS checked volunteer, who comes to visit once a week for half a day to help you with your child. So she can watch the baby whole you nap, or come shopping with you, or just chat. I was referred by my HV but you can self refer. I generally went shopping with my Homestart volunteer or out for lunch, rather than using her to catch up on sleep - I had terrible PND and anxiety, as well as some physical issues from the birth of DS, and found it hard to get out and about, so she really helped. We're still friends now - in fact I have today off work, DS is in nursery, and we're going for a day trip. My mum is dead and none of my aunts live nearby, so she became an honorary mum/aunt/big sister figure to me. I cannot sing Homestart's praises highly enough - you can self-refer, there's no judgement, just sympathetic caring help.

bittapitta · 09/03/2017 18:28

How was your day OP, did you get out? Get any rest? Take one day at a time.

apringle · 09/03/2017 19:19

It will get better in time! Try to have someone come over and be with him, even for that hour you need. It will make a difference.

Original poster
Aliveinwanderland · 09/03/2017 19:21

There was a big accident on the roads near us so we couldn't get out to baby class. Went on a long walk in the sunshine which was nice and I don't feel too bad now. No chance for a nap as his naps weren't long enough but I had some lunch and a sit down.

OP posts:
Original poster
Aliveinwanderland · 09/03/2017 19:23

My mum and dad have come for tea so I had chance for a shower without having to rush and they are going to stay till 10pm and just do resettling for all the wake ups before then.

OP posts:
Lunalovepud · 09/03/2017 19:26

Fab - get to bed and enjoy your rest!

Glitterspy · 09/03/2017 19:53

Sounds like perfectly normal 4 month old breastfed baby behaviour to me. Just grit your teeth and get on with it. Please get some support so you can have a break (a few bottles of formula won't hurt if it helps someone else step in for a night). Don't leave him to cry, you won't be helping him or you.

StrawberryShortcake32 · 09/03/2017 19:53

DS fed about the same at 4 months. If I recall 3 and 4 months are growth spirt months. Best thing is to feed on demand. I combination feed him breast and formula, made no difference to his sleep at all!

He still wakes 3 times a night at 5 months. Not always for feeds, sometimes just a drink, sometimes to just be soothed.
You aren't alone.
My saviour was a reclining breastfeeding chair with footstool. If LO has a bad night (he's teething and constantly just wants to be held, I'll sleep in the chair with him on my lap and pillows to make sure he won't roll off me. I leave the boob out so he can just help himself.

I definitely recommend a nursing chair, you will get valuable shut eye without having to leave him on his own in his room

I hope it gets better for you xx

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread