Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Winning when not your party

97 replies

Hashtagwinner · 04/03/2017 12:07

Dropped dd off at a birthday party (was games based, think bowling/paint ball/football type thing) the other day for a birthday party. DH and I don't drive and venue isnt near home or anyyhing much so we stayed. The venue wasn't booked out so we joined in the game (paying for entry) and played with the guests and members of public.

I came out top against everyone who was playing (both the kids at the party and random members of the public)

DH says I shouldn't have tried so hard and should have let the kids win. AIBU to think I paid so should just play as I normally would?

OP posts:

ShoutOutToMyEx · 04/03/2017 16:38

I just realised your name! 'HashtagWinner'. Good Lord.

I would be mortified if I had had any part in this.

Just sit and read a magazine, it's someone else's kid's birthday, which they've been kind enough to invite your DD to. It's not about what you want.

5moreminutes · 04/03/2017 16:42

Hashtag you're still not telling us how your DD feels - she is horribly embarrassed and refusing to go to school on Monday isn't she? Did you think her friends would think you were cool?

Why did both you and your DH go along together to drop her off? Was the joining in previous planned? Do you see yourselves as Young And Fun Parents? Do you join in at soft play too, and barge small kids out of the way competing to climb fastest/ be first to the slide and hog the under 12s only play equipment at the park and brag to the 6 year olds that you can swing higher and do the monkey bars better than them and secretly believe this means you are more fun than other parents?

ThisThingCalledLove · 04/03/2017 16:42

Ooof. I just cringed so hard reading that I think I've actually turned inside out

ParadiseCity · 04/03/2017 16:47

My primary aged DC would be mortified if I joined in. I really want it to have been crazy golf btw.

Did you know you were winning as you went along? Were there teams or just individual scores?

NerrSnerr · 04/03/2017 17:42

I'm really over invested now and want to know the game. I think it's lazerquest but hope it's crazy golf.

I bloody love a bit of crazy golf (although I think primary school kids would still beat me) but I still wouldn't join in my child's party. I do have the insight to know I'd be embarrassing though.

Notso · 04/03/2017 18:20

I can understand the adults not connected to the party trying to win as they paid to do the activity.
It seems a bit overly competitive for you to try and beat your kid and their classmates.

MadMags · 04/03/2017 18:26

The winning is not an issue.

You and your dh gatecrashing a party is so cringeworthy I nearly curled into a ball reading it.

I'm guessing your dd won't be invited to that child's party again!

nocoolnamesleft · 04/03/2017 19:05

Your poor dd. She's never going to hear the end of this. From the people who used to be her friends.

DonaldStott · 04/03/2017 19:18

You and your dh gatecrashing a party is so cringeworthy I nearly curled into a ball reading it.

Omg yes, this.

Original poster

Hashtagwinner · 04/03/2017 19:31

There is a chance they don't know it was me - didn't use real name on scoreboard. Oh well, coffee next time. I don't think dd cares we joined in but is unhappy I beat her!

OP posts:

MadMags · 04/03/2017 20:26

Are you really that socially dense that you think what you did is ok??

Floggingmolly · 04/03/2017 22:14

There is NO chance they didn't know it was you...

Floggingmolly · 04/03/2017 22:14

There is NO chance they didn't know it was you...

dontbesillyhenry · 04/03/2017 22:16

Are you Alan Partridge?

quarkinstockcubes · 04/03/2017 22:23

Feeling really embarrassed on your behalf OP. We need more elaboration on your motivation; were you going for "cool, down with the yoof" or "in it to win it" parent?

HarryPottersMagicWand · 04/03/2017 22:30

Poor kids having a party like that with a load of adults winning. What's the point!

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 04/03/2017 22:44

If it's something like laser quest, then the more, the merrier. Bowling would be split in to groups of 6 so there wouldn't be one overall winner.

I put in my usual effort because I'm pretty lousy at games like these anyway. Last time we went bowling, I was trounced by my 2 yo!

BlurryFace · 04/03/2017 22:53

If it was set up so the kids were playing against random other adults who weren't trying to let them win, I don't see the harm.

Somewhat, I don't go bowling anymore, the last time I went (years ago) my workmates utter pity for me was so palpable I couldn't laugh off my dreadfulness.

GallivantingWildebeest · 04/03/2017 22:58

I think everyone is being a bit harsh. If it's laser quest or similar, then you don't get a big cup for coming first - it's v low key. Nobody would know who had won.

And surely it's better for our DC to realise that adults can play and have fun too, instead of forever being on the sidelines drinking fucking coffee??

SantanaBinLorry · 04/03/2017 23:02

OP knows she won

sirfredfredgeorge · 04/03/2017 23:06

I hope it's really something more like boxing, and the OP was literally beating the crap out of the birthday kid and their friends.

(YANBU btw if it was a laser quest type game, just playing normally is fine - unless you bought your own gun, special relfective armour and stuff to stop yourself being hit, and spent your whole time killing the b'day kid and shouting abuse as you did it.)

damngina · 04/03/2017 23:40

I can see why you stayed, but, I cannot even fathom why you or your DH thought it would even be reasonable to join in, let alone not recognise the potential for it to be very embarrassing for your DD and awkward for everyone.

You and your DH actually played against the primary school kids attending a birthday group that your own DD was part of - surely that's the most unreasonable part of the whole story?

The playing to win (and loving it) was just the icing on the birthday cake.

the venue wasn't booked out
Do you mean the birthday kid's family should have paid for the whole entire venue in order to have prevented the parents of one of the primary school kids invited to the party, which are so stressful and expensive, pissing on a group of children's parade?
Maybe they did not even conceive that as a eventuality that needed such a precaution.

had I not won another adult would
But not another adult who was a parent of a child attending a school friend's special day.

You were only there because of your DD and her friends.

They knew you were DD's parents, they didn't know any other adults playing from the sounds of it.

That puts you in a different category to the random members of the public who did not know there was a kid's party on when they were making plans so could use the I paid excuse.

How did the birthday child's parent/'s feel?

MadMags · 04/03/2017 23:44

And surely it's better for our DC to realise that adults can play and have fun too, instead of forever being on the sidelines drinking fucking coffee??

Fortunately, I am able to have fun without hijacking the party of my dc's friend.

AndNowItsSeven · 04/03/2017 23:46

Why is bowling a weird party 5 more minutes?

PuraVida · 05/03/2017 00:13

Well done op, there's nothing more affirming than crashing in and beating a load of little kids...oh hang on...

Flip

1 2 3 4

Swipe left for the next trending thread