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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think colleague's behaviour is fucking revolting?

105 replies

justbloodywellstop · 02/03/2017 19:18

Work in big open plan office, about 100-150 on our floor.

All desks are visible all the time, there's no partitions or anything.

A colleague sits and picks their nose constantly throughout the day. Once excavated, nose contents are eaten. I have to try not to look - they are not directly in my eyeline, but it's easy to see them from where I sit - but it makes me gag.

I'm not the only one, several others find it awful too. One lady couldn't eat her lunch the other day because of it.

Nosepicker is fairly senior, apparently their manager has been told about it, and manager has been begged to have a word with nosepicker, but either that discussion hasn't happened or nosepicker has ignored it.

Wtf do we do? This is horrible isn't it? Nosepicker seems to carry on without compunction, I'm starting to wonder if they think this is normal?! I wouldn't allow a 5 year old to do this, why does an adult!

In case it's relevant nosepicker is late 30s/ early 40s. Born and raised in Uk. Degree educated. So old and educated enough to know better, you'd think Hmm

OP posts:
hungryhippo90 · 02/03/2017 21:56

sorry, i think id have to ask him if he werent getting enough greens in his diet.
if you can, record his antics, set up an anonymous email account. send him the video.
maybe it would shame him into stopping? maybe he doesnt know people notice?

PositivePeggyNans · 02/03/2017 22:09

Font 72

On the communal printer

STOP PICKING YOUR NOSE YOU SCRUFF BAG

Itsnotwhatitseems · 02/03/2017 22:27

alternatively, whenever he goes to take a bite of his lunch, start rooting around in your nose in front of him, mind you he may find that enticing as he enjoys eating his nose contents...god I feel sick

cordeliavorkosigan · 03/03/2017 09:47

is it that you don't want to make him feel awkward? because if so, note that he's already made all of you feel worse than awkward...

maybe talk to the manager again and let them know that if it doesn't change you'll have to leave an anonymous note on his desk; then talk to him directly.

how does someone get to that age without being socialised out of this?? .. mind-boggling. and revolting.

sparklefarts · 03/03/2017 09:49

I'm actually having to really focus to not vomit.

StickyMouse · 03/03/2017 12:25

We had a nose pucker who smeared snot on the back of doors, I was oblivious until notes were put around.

Going against the grain but o doubt that hr would or should get involved. His nose, his snot?

OhBlissOhJoy · 03/03/2017 13:10

Box of tissues on his desk with a post-it saying "For your personal use Nosey".
If he doesn't take the hint then get a petition going round the office and take it to his manager so they know the extent of the problem.
Gross.

ManOfKent · 03/03/2017 17:42

Truly disgusting - when the heck did dirt from your nose become either edible or tasty!!

I'd set up an anonymous email address and drop him a "please stop picking your nose and eating it at your desk - we can all see you!"

Wickedstepmum67 · 03/03/2017 17:43

Ugh! The perils of open-plan offices, one being having to witness other people's antisocial habits. But crikey! This is surely one most people actually grow out of? Guess at least he ain't picking and flicking, which would be worse still. A word, firmly and politely, is needed. It's inconsiderate and rude behaviour and the person is very visible.

Sugarlumps333 · 03/03/2017 17:56

This is DISGUSTING - would give me serious rage. I would not be able to eat my lunch / work / allow this person to survive in the office unscathed if I had to watch this vileness. I don't know what to tell you OP, I wear my heart on my sleeve - I would have said something by now such as 'OMG can you not do that? Get a tissue?' / 'Stop PICKING YOUR FUCKING NOSE IN THE OFFICE YOU DIRTY PIG'. This is not acceptable behaviour, if you work with other people you cannot do this. I worked with someone last year who used to do something similar - sticking their fingers in their ear and then looking at it. They were new, their filthy habit did not continue after I saw it once.

GwenStaceyRocks · 03/03/2017 17:58

I'd contact HR even if they are in a different building. It's disgusting Envy If that doesn't work - I'd go to the Union.Honestly, I wouldn't put up with this at all and it must be contravening some kind of health and safety or appropriate behaviour at work code.

2017SoFarSoGood · 03/03/2017 18:04

please contact the appropriate manager by email, and copy the HR department - just as an fyi. That may do more to encourage manager to do their job. Gross!

if manager does not respond, escalate until it is handled.

Arthur2shedsJackson · 03/03/2017 18:10

Another suggestion for the post-it note:
'If you find two, can I have one?'

StickyMouse · 03/03/2017 18:22

What HR policy has he flouted! If he is his forties he clearly doesn't give a damn and doesn't care who is losing their lunch around him

ThoraGruntwhistle · 03/03/2017 18:23

A large anonymous note on the desk saying

YOUR NOSE IS NOT A SNACK DISPENSER.
You are making other workers feel sick. Please address your behaviour. Many thanks in advance.

Saj1988 · 03/03/2017 18:26

Or ask them if they'd like a fork!

Monkeypuzzle32 · 03/03/2017 18:45

Gross!! I was nearly sick once on the tube platform when someone did this!

Twinklecomic · 03/03/2017 18:52

It's s compulsion. Sorry if someone else had already said this I am chiming in after reading page 1of this. It has a name and it needs challenging and treatment. It is disgusting but even if action was taken via HR it won't stop it. In fact it will increase the anxiety. There was a girl in my secondary who used so this and peel the skin off her fingers. We have her he'll and it didn't stop her at all and she now remembers us all with humiliated loathing. I am so sorry for you. Because it used to make me heave. But as this person suffers from this compunction they need to be moved out of sight of the others. Oddly enough s complete change of working venue might knock them off off that obsessive track.

NotYoda · 03/03/2017 18:53

In this situation, I think an anonymous note is justified

Possibly in cut-up newspaper?

Cubtrouble · 03/03/2017 18:54

Go for all of the above, signs, HR, tissues and every time (I'm assuming HE) does it make a lots of loud comments and vomiting voices.

Rank

toffeeboffin · 03/03/2017 18:55

How come there's all these companies with no HR departments?!

IronWoman · 03/03/2017 18:55

My sister got worms from eating her bogies. Just saying.

I have to agree with a typed note left on his desk, it is revolting behaviour - and in public!!!

toffeeboffin · 03/03/2017 18:56

Just seen it's in a different building.

What difference does that make though Confused

LegosAndSkiing · 03/03/2017 19:01

How revolting, whilst in traffic I see men do this regularly. I think it is just a natural habit to people who do it.

If I were you, I would say to him "You are disgusting, haven't you go any shame, can't you see there are people around, you are making us feel ill you animal" 😤😤😤

I might sound very harsh, but having OCD I can't cope with anything like that.

Mermaidinthesea · 03/03/2017 19:03

If one of my colleagues did that I would march up to their desk and tell them to stop being so disgusting right in front of the whole office, i would say that everyone is sick to the stomach of looking at it. That's the only way to deal with revoldting rhino skinned nose pickers. That person is totally unacceptable.