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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think colleague's behaviour is fucking revolting?

105 replies

justbloodywellstop · 02/03/2017 19:18

Work in big open plan office, about 100-150 on our floor.

All desks are visible all the time, there's no partitions or anything.

A colleague sits and picks their nose constantly throughout the day. Once excavated, nose contents are eaten. I have to try not to look - they are not directly in my eyeline, but it's easy to see them from where I sit - but it makes me gag.

I'm not the only one, several others find it awful too. One lady couldn't eat her lunch the other day because of it.

Nosepicker is fairly senior, apparently their manager has been told about it, and manager has been begged to have a word with nosepicker, but either that discussion hasn't happened or nosepicker has ignored it.

Wtf do we do? This is horrible isn't it? Nosepicker seems to carry on without compunction, I'm starting to wonder if they think this is normal?! I wouldn't allow a 5 year old to do this, why does an adult!

In case it's relevant nosepicker is late 30s/ early 40s. Born and raised in Uk. Degree educated. So old and educated enough to know better, you'd think Hmm

OP posts:
JasonDeruloFan · 02/03/2017 19:48

No don't video it if they are senior to you

velourvoyageur · 02/03/2017 19:53

Apologies OP, didn't realise the person concerned had those issues. Hope she was feeling better quickly.

Original poster
justbloodywellstop · 02/03/2017 19:57

Honestly we couldn't shout across the office, it's a fairly quiet office despite being open plan and that would be likely to get us in trouble for being disruptive.

It's tricky because nosey is older and more senior (although doesn't manage any of us), so i feel like it needs to come from a manager.

I just don't get why they do it though. I get a horrible feeling nosey might be doing it out of a sense of superiority, knowing we won't say anything Confused

OP posts:
ToffeeForEveryone · 02/03/2017 19:58

I used to be a PA for someone who did this. New job, I spoke to his manager, who did nothing.

I quit. The leaving interview with HR was interesting ... Grin

Tiredbutfuckingfine · 02/03/2017 20:03

Leave a note saying "please stop picking your nose and eating it as at least one of us in the office finds it disgusting. Apologies for asking this way but it's this or we go to HR"
Am a HR person hoping this does not turn out to be on my watch...Envy not envy

chitofftheshovel · 02/03/2017 20:08

Could you get as many of you as possible to (fake) nose pick/eat when nosey does it?

jayho · 02/03/2017 20:15

I had a colleague, same level, who did this. One day I just looked up and said clearly 'did you just pick your nose?' he never did it again but then it probably helped that I'm old enough to be his mother (just).

I do agree with a private message (we have instant messaging) asking them to stop because it is distressing others. Makes it slightly detatched but thoughtful as you have not broadcast

MsJamieFraser · 02/03/2017 20:23

Ask the manager again, if this does not work, go to her manager, however personally being a manager, they could only have a quiet word with her, they cannot give a verbal warning just because she picks her nose, let alone dismiss her, I agree its disgusting however.

NiceMoustache · 02/03/2017 20:24

Get this sent to them at work wordery.com/dont-pick-your-nose-symone-frazer-9781519228956

blankmind · 02/03/2017 20:27

Who else visits your office? Could a visitor complain about it? I would, want me to visit? Wink

Can you take photos/video Nosey in action to take to their manager so they can literally see how vile it is.
Also note how many times a day Nosey does it.

Could you play bogey bingo and have a kitty and a draw at the end of every day for the person who guesses the correct amount of bogies scoffed in a working day/2 hour slot/time period of choice.

Years ago, we had a snotgobbler in our office, I left before they were dealt with so don't know how it panned out, but I do sympathise, it's revolting to have to see behaviour like that. One interim measure was we re-arranged all our desks so none of us had a direct view any more.

StrangeLookingParasite · 02/03/2017 20:29

Oh god that's just disgusting.

PickAChew · 02/03/2017 20:36

I always think that it's better to eat the evidence than to wipe it on the furniture, or collect it in a drawer.

throughgrittedteeth · 02/03/2017 20:39

A note on his desk I reckon. Written and printed out so he can't identify handwriting. Keep it polite, perhaps mention bringing a bit of extra lunch with him Grin

testing123testing123 · 02/03/2017 20:44

I used to work with someone who would pick his nose and wipe it in client files. I reckon that's worse!

Hateloggingin · 02/03/2017 20:44

Is it a law firm? I knew someone who did this, they were a solicitor, intrigued if there are lots about or it's the same person

roundaboutthetown · 02/03/2017 20:56

IMO, if they are going to pick their nose in public, it is far better to eat what they excavate than to flick it on the floor or across the desk, or leave it stuck behind their fingernails... Have you considered buying them a box of tissues? Grin

limitedperiodonly · 02/03/2017 21:10

Just tell them that their behaviour is revolting. HR is not your mummy.

Funnyface1 · 02/03/2017 21:16

Leave an anonymous note on his desk, that is rancid.

tinglyfing · 02/03/2017 21:19

"Oi, you there picky mcpickerson! It's not bloody lunch time yet you know!"

MyMorningHasBroken · 02/03/2017 21:19

Gross! I watch kids sit and pick their noses each day which really puts me off my lunch and has turned me a bit OCD with the antibac wipes and gel.
I couldn't manage an adult doing it.

Original poster
justbloodywellstop · 02/03/2017 21:44

Nosey isn't a solicitor but we are a legal related business - is it something about the type of work?!

Lady who sits nearest always keeps a big box of tissues on her desk, but Nosey just ignores them, preferring to have a root around.

I think it's disgusting when kids do it, let alone adults. Nosey has kids, I can only imagine they're a whole family of pickers, yuck.

I feel confronting Nosey would be awkward due to them being senior, when we've talked about it at work we all felt it was better coming from a manager, just not sure Noseys manager will have the conversation, or that Nosey will stop.

In which case I guess we go to manager's manager.

Jesus, when I started work I never thought I'd have to complain about sitting on sight of a nose picker!

OP posts:
Itsnotwhatitseems · 02/03/2017 21:47

leave a post it note on his desk, "no nose picking today please"

MrsMcMoo · 02/03/2017 21:50

That's so gross. Just reading it (almost) put me off my glass of wine!

DopeyDazy · 02/03/2017 21:51

Ask him for a bogey harvest, its probably the answer to 3rd world famine

morningconstitutional2017 · 02/03/2017 21:52

It is disgusting and in an office of over 100 people I'm surprised there isn't at least one brave, confrontational type who feels equal to tackling them. Something has to be said, firstly the line manager then HR.