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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

4 year olds and sex - what the hell?!!

60 replies

QwertyScrewdriver · 28/02/2017 16:58

So about three weeks ago I was with my son on a play date at his friend's house (a girl), they are both 4 and have played together since a few weeks old. They wanted to play together in the friends upstairs playroom. As me and the other mum went back down to get a cuppa she said, out of earshot, 'Play nicely kids, don't have sex' and chuckled. I thought it odd but ignored it as I assumed she had a brain fart and would rather forget it entirely, speaking from experience when I've said something totally awkward and then spend the next 20 minutes replaying it in my head while cringing.
Cut to today and she said in front of her daughter how cross her husband would be if he found out she had a boy in her room alone. THEY ARE 4 YEARS OLD FFS! Then went to great length to explain to her that if my DS had a sleepover he would be expected to sleep downstairs alone (not in any one of their 3 spare bedrooms) as boys shouldn't sleep in the same rooms as girls and if he was in a room near her he might try to sneak in. It's completely out the question anyway as he wouldn't be sleeping over there but it's made me feel really awkward. One of our friends has a DD who slept in the bed when her mum had a baby, as the photos were posted on facebook, so girls are exempt from the rule.
AIBU to feel really put out by it, like she's suggesting my DS or boys in general can't keep their hands to themselves even from this early age? I know the PANTS rule is being pushed now and I wholeheartedly agree with this but is this level of 'protection' really necessary?
(Sorry if I'm not coming across in the right way, I'm in shock!)

OP posts:
brasty · 01/03/2017 12:13

Well it is normal. Does not mean every child does it, but lots do a variation on it. It is curiosity.

DJBaggySmalls · 01/03/2017 12:16

she said in front of her daughter how cross her husband would be if he found out she had a boy in her room alone.

Stay well clear, she isnt being appropriate. I feel sorry for her daughter.

Rixera · 01/03/2017 12:51

Legos, look at child development- between children of the same age, investigation is normal. Specific 'adult' knowledge is not.

yerbutnobut · 01/03/2017 14:51

Sounds like shes putting out fires before they even happen (not that they will), perhaps due to her own experiences, establishing boundaries but its coming out in a strange some what random manifesto.

IamFriedSpam · 01/03/2017 14:55

I agree with others - totally normal to be interested in bits you don't have at that age, it's not sexual at all.

Carno13 · 01/03/2017 22:02

That's really strange, I think I would have asked her why she said that?

emmyrose2000 · 02/03/2017 00:04

This woman isn't normal. Who tells FOUR year olds not to have sex?!

I'd drop her like a hot potato.

DioneTheDiabolist · 02/03/2017 00:15

Are they 2nd or 3rd generation travellers? Might explain her view.
WTAF iogo?

INTOVERYYNG · 16/02/2025 10:04

This reply has been deleted

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TheKeatingFive · 16/02/2025 10:05

Very odd. No more sleepovers there methinks.

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