To think that there must be a tech related reason that so may teenagers are depressed and anxious

[38cody]

At least 70% of the teens I know are anxious and/or depressed. I don't remember any of my peers going through this - panic attacks, weeping etc.
I can only think that it's something to do with how they are communicating online?

I have a general feeling that every sort of new technology gets this sort of reaction from the older generation. I remember when I was a kid the whole thing was TV is bad for you. I bet once a group of parents sat round their cave complaining that teenagers were getting all stressed by the influence of that new fangled wheel.

I think using phones instead of chatting eg while waiting for a meeting to start should be minimised, to encourage interaction, but otherwise social media is good, with the exception of getting too much bad news from round the world.

I was at boarding school 25 years ago and there was an epidemic of anorexia, self-harm a decade before I ever heard it mentioned elsewhere, half a dozen suicide attempts, and huge, huge amounts of drinking to oblivion to blot out dealing with being a teenager.

Teenagers used to be able to get jobs from 13, or at least voluntary work. Places won't take them below 16 now. So less social contact with adults, much more worry about getting a job or having any future - sure people worried about getting jobs and money in the past, but if you were down on your luck you weren't told by society that it was your fault for not doing better in your GCSEs years ago!

Not enough exercise, not enough sunshine and outside time, not enough sleep, not enough quality food, not enough real communication, media pressure to be "X" (whatever the media/society has decided is the thing everyone should be/have/do), peer pressure to be "X", parental pressure to achieve academically

This, in a nutshell.

I feel sorry for teenagers in many ways and think this generation has it harder than the one before

Many have had little childhood freedoms / responsibilities, and have no confidence to deal with day to day situations - they seem to be kids for much longer.
There was no such thing as 'helicopter parenting' 20 years ago and there are different dangers out there now - dangers that as parents we did not have to face so don't really understand.

Then on the brink of adulthood they may realize that there is actually very little out there for them.

Over population has removed many opportunities like affordable housing and many are forced to live with their parents well into adulthood or in shitty private rented over priced accommodation. Home ownership for the young is only for those whose parents can afford to help with the deposit. Living with parents into your 20s is soul destroying for a young adult wanting to step up and take control of their own life. It is stunting them big time

For those wanting to step in to higher education, they face huge debts that previous generations didn't .

I would be depressed too if I was in my teens, I think this generation has been royally shafted by the one before, and one before that

I don't think technology has a thing to do with it, I think tech is a great thing - other than dangers such as cyber bullying / online grooming etc, which are relatively new - I think they are great developments

When I was a kid, we used to have to trek to the library and rifle through indexes to find out information, these days it is all literally at your fingertips - it's amazing

I think it's cultural. I think we now bring children up to have every risk averted and every minor squabble/nasty comment become bullying, every minor illness rushed to doctors and every minute of a baby/toddlers routine cross examined. We've lost common sense and wisdom. We rubbish the knowledge and pragmatism of grandparents if they are in the least irritating, we expect relationships to be perfect or we shout " Get rid of him". Perfection is hard to live up to. It used to be understood that teenagers were miserable sometimes, that they worried around exam time and got moody. They grew out of it having learned about themselves along the way. Now we promote the myth of constant happiness. That isn't normal or healthy. We need to build resilience throughout childhood. I don't think it's anything to do with tech. I honk it's neurotic parenting.

I think a large part is academic pressure. It's all my 15 year old hears at school (luckily he is fairly immune). In my day we had exams and the rest of the time was fairly laid back - he's had his GCSE targets given to him from year 7 with constant analysis of whether he's on target or not.

My 12 year old is at a school that prioritises mental health and actual education over exam results. which is a bit nerve wracking as a parent tbh

Agree with crumbs as well (and ds3's school makes a deliberate effort to teach resilience).

Teenagers now have lots of things to deal with that I didn't.
But I grew up in Thatcher Britain where in many industrial communities unemployment was very high, and the media were telling us that some of us would never be able to get a job.
We have come out of a boom, so those who grew up in the last generation were I think more fortunate, and also benefited from more awareness of childrens rights. But every generation has its own challenges growing up. Inagine growing up during the Blitz as my DP did, with many male relatives dying on the battlefields?

Not DP, DF

Here are some stats, very detailed so not that easy to compare, on suicides from 1980 to recent times.

I don't think there is a huge change, in fact I think there is a decrease. Though the proportion of girls might be higher.

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/deaths/adhocs/005618suicidesbyregiongenderagegroupandmonthofoccurrenceenglandandwales1981to2013

The teen years are bad enough as they are - but seriously the amount they must be exacerbated by social media

It's definitely a thing and it's good we are discussing as it's eminently fixable

we expect relationships to be perfect or we shout " Get rid of him".

I really don't think that's the case.

That is good that there has been a decrease in suicides. Obviously we need to do more to promote good mental health for young people. I know that developing resilience is crucial.

I'm another one who partly blames social media. There's far too much attention paid to appearance, but apart from teens being depressed there also seems to be an awful lot of vanity about. All the constant pouting selfies and the need to be told how "gorgeous, beautiful, stunning they are. Everything seems a bit fake somehow. I pity today's teens, the future must seem a bit bleak, no decent jobs, no chance of ever getting their own home.The future isn't bright.

YABU, I've struggled with anxiety and depression since my early twenties. I am now in my forties. My family has a history of it too - often for very good reasons ...

Children have to be supported to build resilience to avoid anxiety problems as teenagers. Very often, they never get the chance to become resilient and balanced as they aren't exposed to a lot of different situations. It's natural to want to protect your children from harm, but it isn't helpful to their development.

It's natural to want to protect your children from harm, but it isn't helpful to their development.

True.

Whoever used the examples of Sweden is missing the point.

Sweden is a highly integrated country, whether church-going or not. Family life is strong. Community is strong. I think here in the UK there is a loss of a "holding" for the teenager, which used to be provided, at least to some extent, by church, school and family. Exam results, individualism and materialism are not good substitutes.

There has always been depression, going back centuries. But I think some of the maladies we are seeing now are much more widespread and extreme. Teenagers are still happy or sad, as they have always been, but I think there are more problems that is making some things harder for them.

greenthings, my point was more that this can't be explained by something as external as technology- so actually we are probably saying the same thing

partly I think you are right about Sweden being very family-orientated, partly I think the welfare society has left an almost naïve belief that "everything will be all right"- that's something that strikes me every time I go back

not so sure about community always being stronger than here though

Lots of things have changed for thr younger generation though: long hours in childcare from a young age is becoming more the norm. Some nurseries are lovely and stimulating and nurturing. But some I wouldn't leave a dog in.

I think family breakdown is a big factor too. Divorce can be tough for kids, obviously not as tough as living in an abusive home. But many relationships break down because of infidelity and immaturity rather than abuse.

Also agree with the idea of protecting them from harm: I think they are a bit too mollycoddled and wrapped upon cotton wool and not given the skills to over come things:
Teaching children they may not be the best at maths, but it's ok;

Bullying is an interesting one here: some children are quite inherently nasty, and even if the school is aware, they often can't control the snidey little remarks made, totally : so, if someone is basically being bullied, they are going to have to learn, we need to to stand up for themselves, not let it get to them, etc etc, as part of the coping strategy.

Teaching kids to cope: with the disappointments, not getting that job/uni place/grade; being dumped.

Those are very important lessons that need to be taught too. And if taught well, they can at least make the depression or anxiety not quite so bad.

Parents are closer to their children and more internet savy than they once were, more open, I think.

A shit tonne of pressure with shit prospects at the end of it , constantly being told they're entitled and have it easy whilst staring down the barrel of a gun of never being able to afford a house or get a job whilst being told that everyone around them is changing the world and they should be too. Globalisation of tech allows for them to see millions of people's better lives, better looks, better grades and better achievements. And no one teaches them about wellness or taking care of themselves - they're told they should be perfect in the day and a party/ social animal at night with 8 million extracurriculars, 2 languages and perfect bodies.
It's taken me 4 years of living alone to realise that the worse I treat my body then the worse my mind reacts.
No wonder they're so fucking anxious.