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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Toddler minds

53 replies

user1483996184 · 24/02/2017 19:20

AIBU to wonder what the fuck goes through their minds?? My 2.8 year old has just emptied my St Tropez all over the bathroom .. Got a feeling I've not managed to get it all off and my bathroom is going to have a lovely orange twinge to it in the morning

OP posts:
boringbetty · 24/02/2017 22:43

Felicia I think it's about time parents had more tantrums

SydneyCarton · 24/02/2017 22:56

My toddler phoned 999 this morning while I was washing up and told the nice man that mummy was asleep in the bath (chance would be a fine thing). We were about two minutes away from the Met breaking down the door Angry

Marmalady75 · 24/02/2017 23:08

Mine had a tantrum when I changed his nappy. He grabbed the wet one and screamed when I took it off him to put it in the nappy bin. Cue 10 minutes of him clinging to the bin wailing like his only friend in the world was trapped inside it.

Don't get me started on toilets either. Now he has figured out how to flush them I live in dread of what I'll find in it. Yesterday I was washing my hands and turned round to find he had whipped off a shoe, thrown it down the toilet and was reaching for the flush.

Valentine2 · 24/02/2017 23:12

My youngest is a walking talking threat to the toilet. Cost us a lot lately. He is the reason I have a hideous living room decor. And he insists on getting involoved into everything whether it's cooking or cleaning or just watching tv.
Yesterday we had a tantrum because the egg was not "like an egg". Confused so he couldn't eat it. And I have yet to get the courage to open and salvage something out of the cosmetics bag he destroyed the other day by smearing everything on everything. Oh and he brazenly blames it all on anyone else who has the misfortune to be around at the time.
I don't think I will miss their toddlerhood at all.

Valentine2 · 24/02/2017 23:17

This might out me but some time ago both of my DCs managed to get us investigated by the police because of some antics they pulled up round the landline while I wasn't watching. Hmm
One day I might think of all this and laugh. i won't

Solasum · 24/02/2017 23:21

My 3yo got very upset earlier because I wouldn't let him have some prawns to make his legs grow longer. (He had had dinner, so was far from Hungry). He also reports other people's feelings to me, even if they are not present: 'Daddy is sad so he wants you to give me sweets'

chatnanny · 25/02/2017 00:59

My DGS is 2y7m, yesterday he was having a drink of water sitting on his step by our patio doors. He said "you got cake Granny?" I made a fruit cake the other day but wasn't sure he'd like it so gave him a tiny bit which he ate. So I gave him another lump. So he's happy and I'm doing the dishwasher and I look back and the cake is smeared all over the glass..."for the dog"

ShootFruit · 25/02/2017 03:05

MiddleClass I'm going through a shitty break up just now. Sudocreme and telly(s) seem very appealing l. I hate ab extra large pot in the bathroom.

Bubbinsmakesthree · 25/02/2017 03:21

So reassuring to read threads like this! "Being a dick" is my 2yo's speciality at the moment.

Tantrums I can deal with, but the deliberate dickishness drives me nuts - today throwing his yogurt across the kitchen with a gleeful smirk. Angry

HopelesslydevotedtoGu · 25/02/2017 04:27

Mine likes to use toilet rolls as dogs, she holds onto the lose end as the lead, and takes her dog for a walk, the 'lead' getting longer and longer as she walks round the house. Once she walked four at once, toilet paper everywhere...

If the roll breaks or you stop her she screams, I think in her mind you really are destroying her beloved pets.

BoredOnMatLeave · 25/02/2017 07:22

This thread is hilarious. But I have just turned to my sleeping 7 month old DD and whispered "please don't be a dick"

Applebite · 25/02/2017 07:26

Amongst other dickish things 1 year old loves to do, she adores pulling all my (many hundreds of) books off the bookshelves. Why? You have loads of toys, go and play with them!!

She also does this thing when she's a bit frustrated where she sort of grits her teeth and makes a noise whilst shaking something - she'll do it to my arm if I say no, for example. She's currently walking around the lounge holding a teddy bear warmly by the throat and doing that right in its face.

I worry she won't be v popular when she starts nursery!!! Grin

Bubbinsmakesthree · 25/02/2017 07:42

But I have just turned to my sleeping 7 month old DD and whispered "please don't be a dick"

It's inevitable, sorry. They are all dicks.

Bubbinsmakesthree · 25/02/2017 08:05

He's currently chasing the cat round the house trying to give her a 'high five'. Such a dick.

CaveMum · 25/02/2017 08:07

I'm told between the ages of 5 and 8 they're rather pleasant to be around. Either side of that, they're just dicks in one form or another Wink

Littlelegs19 · 25/02/2017 09:27

Sitting here with my 13 week old son, laughing at some of your toddlers antics, saying a small prayer to him "please be good for mummy when your older!"

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 25/02/2017 10:08

Yanbu. But I still think that now and DS is five.

Rixera · 25/02/2017 10:45

I am currently pointedly ignoring DD's tantrum over the fact that her bottom is not big enough to sit on all of her toy cars at once.
Why she wants to do that anyway is beyond me given we were having a nice game driving them around moments ago, and cars must be quite uncomfortable to sit on, but at least it's preferable to the very public tantrum the other day when she couldn't pick up an actual car.

SparkyBlue · 25/02/2017 10:45

CaveMum my four year old daughter is an absolute joy. I could happily sell the one year old at times Grin

Deploycharitygoats · 25/02/2017 11:14

In the greengrocers yesterday, the owner offered 2yo DS1 a chip from the carton he was eating for lunch. DS brightly says "thank you!" and attempts to walk away with the entire carton. Dick.

Still, I suppose he said thank you?

WhooooAmI24601 · 25/02/2017 11:21

DS1 is 11 now and an absolute bellend, having pre-teen strops and all that but til now he was never that much of a dick. I was a smug look-at-my-lovely-child-type when DS2 was born 6 years ago. He's spent the last 6 years being an absolute dick to punish me for the smug.

He painted my entire BRAND NEW bed in bright pink nail polish a couple of years ago. He painted a carpet with a Chanel lippy. If he could get hold of eyeliner the dog would have go-faster stripes down her back. He once put our old-man-cat into a wicker basket, sat on it and fell asleep, all I could hear was the sad, slow howl of a cat who'd given up on life. He puts his fingers in weird holes, gets his head stuck in everything and dresses our new kitten in his Build-a-Bear costumes while the kittens eyes scream "help me". Never met such a dick.

EustaceClarenceScrubb · 25/02/2017 11:25

Sudocreme is evil. It clings. I was still finding it in various nooks and crannies of our dining table weeks after the smearing event. Bastard.

Hgmother · 25/02/2017 11:26

Mine had a giant tantrum because she asked for my phone this morning and I said she can have it (10 mins whilst getting up and ready). I still dont understand why she got so worked about getting something she wanted lol!

CigarsofthePharoahs · 25/02/2017 11:36

Oh goodness. Mine has developed a sudden obsession with my ver ver expensive Lakeland heated airer. He's trying to shut himself inside it.
Why????? He has so many toys, but all he does is chuck them about and wander off.
This morning I came downstairs and he said "You can believe this mess mummy, you can!"
Oh and for goodness sake, please stop changing the language selection on your toy Pup Pad to German!

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