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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to storm down the hospital and act like a raving lunatic?

74 replies

toffeepuddin · 19/02/2017 19:54

Because that's what I feel like.

My consultant told me to book a hysteroscopy (camera in womb) before I book my IVF. I got told at the reception it was to be16th March and she wrote it down on a card for me. I went ahead and booked my IVF, due to start meds on 31st March.
Received a letter yesterday morning to confirm my hysteroscopy appointment on the 30th March I hope to god its a typo, not only am I on my period then but its when I'm due to start the meds.
If they don't rectify this and say "oh sorry its all fully booked now", it would hold up my treatment which I've been waiting years for. I'm going out of my mind with worry.

OP posts:

Northernlurker · 19/02/2017 22:09

Elder? WIDER!

tirednurse · 19/02/2017 22:13

Archimandrite but we're not talking life and death here, that's what is come down too now in the NHS staff are just fire fighting, if it's not a matter of life and death there's very little we can do.

ReginaGeorgeinSheepsClothing · 19/02/2017 22:20

OP i am so sorry you are upset, but we are broken in the NHS both staff and the shitey service we can offer, we are cancelling in my hospital elective ortho surgeries as the beds are taken up by boarders, cancer reducing drugs are no longer being prescribed and people are going to US and Poland from my fb newsfeed today to get treatment the NHS can't afford to give- a fortnights delay is not that bad.

Archimandrite · 19/02/2017 22:20

Tired that's just so awful to hear :( Awful for the people giving the care and awful for us as patients. .

vjg13 · 19/02/2017 22:22

No need to go in person, a conversation with the consultant's secretary should be enough. Try ringing from 8:30.

haveacupoftea · 19/02/2017 22:30

Can you start the IVF next month instead?

tirednurse · 19/02/2017 22:40

Archmandrite it is awful, most people have no idea what's actually going on. We are now discharging children all the time with possible life threatening conditions but who are not so unwell that it is actually life and death at that moment telling them that they'll receive appointments for further tests in the post, there easily waiting 3-4 months minimum and that for "urgent" tests.

Original poster

toffeepuddin · 19/02/2017 22:42

no doubt other people will have booked their ivf in by now, and its not just as simple as put eh ivf back 2 weeks. it goes on my periods cycles etc. Like I said a few posts ago, Ive calmed down and I'm just gonna see what they can do. I'm just going to have be prepared for it to be held back. I'm starting with the counsellor soon so hopefully itll be someone to get my head straight and think clearly.

OP posts:

Northernlurker · 19/02/2017 22:54

Counselling seems very sensible, you've got a lot to deal with

TheWoodlander · 19/02/2017 23:02

You poor thing, OP - it must be incredibly stressful

Do try counselling/techniques for anxiety, as you want to embark on IVF with as little stress as possible, and obviously these nhs shenanigans aren't going to help that.

I too felt like tearing my hair out over my ds's appointments and medication (I posted upthread), and it's not anything life threatening - but it's my child, and I just couldn't deal with the additional nightmare of a gap in medication/appointment delay/speaking on the phone to someone who couldn't help me.

It was Ok for us in the end, hope it is for you too. Good luck.

OverthinkingSpartacus · 19/02/2017 23:21

I had a mammogram in January (should have been November but was cancelled three times) and the appointment with my consultant to discuss results has been knocked back three times also. It's currently mid March but I wouldn't be suprised if it gets changed again.

I'm really hoping that it's a sign there's nothing worrying or life threatening discovered on mammogram or they wouldn't wait three months to give results. But if it is something serious, I'm worried that it'll be several months again before any treatment starts.

I think our NHS is finished tbh.

Original poster

toffeepuddin · 20/02/2017 08:56

It's a shame it really is what's happening to the NHS but they need to pull the money from somewhere, this is people's lives.
After all the worry and commotion, the receptionist had rang me 5 minutes ago and told me they had booked the same thing twice she said stick to the one on the 16th and we'll cancel the 30th. She said it was a good job I had left a voice mail message as it would have meant someone else would have missed out on an appointment. Drama over, my DP is calling me a nut as per but I don't care as its all sorted woodlander I start the counselling soon, my GP wanted to put me on anxiety meds but I won't put anything into my system whilst ttc. I shall remain a nervous wreck in the mean time.

OP posts:

Julia2016 · 20/02/2017 10:02

Toffee, I just wanted to say that I hope everything works out for you. We are ttcing our 2nd at the moment and getting nowhere and I get stressed, I can't imagine what you are going through. Wishing you the best.

Archimandrite · 20/02/2017 10:06

Toffee so glad it was just a mistake and you still have your original appointment. Good luck with everything. I imagine it would be almost impossible not to have anxiety problems when you are going through all this

Blastandtroph · 20/02/2017 10:50

Glad it's sorted Toffee. Good luck with everything.

agedknees · 20/02/2017 12:24

Nhs is in a right mess ATM. After 36 years of working as a nurse I am resigning tomorrow.

Original poster

toffeepuddin · 20/02/2017 13:14

Thanks everyone, I hope I get there, now having a child just seems a dream that will never be a reality. Ive been trying nearly 4 years, haven't had any IVF yet, got it all to come. agedknees God that's awful, I heard it's on its knees, there meant to be cutting the rounds of IVF down too, currently in my area we get 3 free goes. I hope to have my 3 before it changes x

OP posts:

Kbear · 20/02/2017 13:23

You sound so stressed and my heart goes out to you. No words of mine will help with the anxiety but fingers crossed your dreams come true.

Archimandrite · 20/02/2017 14:57

I hope you get there too Toffee. Lots and lots of luck.

Aged so sad it's reached a point where people are desperate to get out :( Good luck with resignation and hope you are a lot happier away from the mess.

onbroadway89 · 20/02/2017 15:16

Thanks everyone, I hope I get there, now having a child just seems a dream that will never be a reality. Ive been trying nearly 4 years, haven't had any IVF yet, got it all to come. agedknees God that's awful, I heard it's on its knees, there meant to be cutting the rounds of IVF down too, currently in my area we get 3 free goes. I hope to have my 3 before it changes

OP, I just wanted to wish you good luck and say I understand the huge stress infertility treatment has on you. I was 12 years and numerous IVF attempts (selling our house to afford it as it was not on the NHS in our area). Do try and be as kind to yourself, and to each other, during this time. Feel free to contact me if you want to rant, I understand so very much. Good luck.

WayfaringStranger · 20/02/2017 18:37

I hope you get there too. FWIW, I would happily pay more tax if I knew it was going to fund frontline NHS treatments like yours.

Italiangreyhound · 20/02/2017 20:40

toffeepudding RELAX! Stress will not help the process, it won't necessary cause problems either but wont help.

I recommend a Zita West (fertility expert) relaxing DVD. Did not get me pregnant but it may help you relax.

It's a tenner or less, and she gets you to make a heart shape with your hand and lie with it over your tummy! After all the stress, it is nice, honest!

www.zitawest.com/product-category/cds-and-downloads/

NO I do not work for Zita!

Bless you XXXXXX

Italiangreyhound · 20/02/2017 20:50

hands..., actually your thumbs and fingers...

elliejjtiny · 20/02/2017 21:18

so pleased you got it sorted. I understand your stress, I've got a 3 year old who has a chronic illness and I've phoned his consultant's secretary so many times in a mad panic because I've had letters saying the complete opposite of what we had planned. Those kind of letters always seem to come at the weekend too.

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