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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to ask about your plus sized pregnancy?

54 replies

Moanyoldcow · 18/02/2017 16:11

I'm fat. I'm losing weight, being much healthier etc. But I want another baby. Are there any women out there who had a relatively straightforward pregnancy and birth whilst being fat?

My first pregnancy with DS was ok except for SPD in third trimester and then high BP at the end worked full time throughout. I had em cs after a failed induction and it was pretty bad (lots of blood loss, minor infection afterwards) and I'm scared that It will be worse this time now I'm older.

I do understand the risks and I'm making changes (lost a stone so far this year) but realistically I can't wait much longer - I'm nearly 39.

I'd really appreciate you sharing your experiences if you've been in a similar situation.

Thank you.

OP posts:
ollieplimsoles · 18/02/2017 23:29

My bmi was 31 during my pregnancy with dd, perfectly normal pregnancy and straightforward, quick birth. But it did ruin things because I was so worried about what the midwives would say, they were all lovely but I wished I had been a bit slimmer.

haveacupoftea · 19/02/2017 00:10

25 weeks pregnant here with high BMI, size 20 pre pregnancy. Everything good and straightforward so far, no spd or abnormal aches or pains other than the usual, blood pressure is fine but have developed GD unfortunately. I'm supposed to put on 5-9 kg altogether, have 2.5 kg on so far but now that i'm on a strict GD diet i'm actually losing again.

If I were you, I wouldn't wait any longer but just continue eating healthily and losing weight while ttc.

elodie2000 · 19/02/2017 00:14

BMI 40+ when I was pregnant. Normal blood pressure, normal birth, swollen feet at end.
Kept being sent to hospital to be monitored because GP surgery midwife could hear baby through fat - seriously Grin but all good!! Haha!

elodie2000 · 19/02/2017 00:14

couldn't

devuskums · 19/02/2017 00:29

I have had 2 children, 1st when I got pregnant with bmi of morbidly obese when I was 26. 2nd when I was 35 and bmi was just overweight. No probs at all except 2nd was ec as she was unexpectedly breech. Both babies weighed well under 7lbs. I am 41 now, bmi has gone back up and I am 8 weeks pregnant!!!

devuskums · 19/02/2017 00:30

Go for it op....and fingers crossed...x

Original poster
Moanyoldcow · 19/02/2017 00:35

Thank you all so much - I honestly feel so much better. I'm hoping my fertility will still be ok - I conceived DS first month when I was 34 so it's been a while. But that's another thread I suppose!!

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 19/02/2017 00:39

You're 38 years old so there's still time to lose weight.

I'm sorry but I don't agree with people just blithely telling you to 'go for it'.

Would they say the same to a smoker who said they were unable to give up smoking before TTC?

The possible risks to mother and baby are quite similar.

Can you have a word with your GP or a nurse at your surgery? They could probably give you advice on where to go from here.

Good luck Thanks

WorraLiberty · 19/02/2017 00:42

Actually forget my advice OP. I've just realised you've said 'you're fat'. You didn't say you were obese Blush

'Fat' can mean many things to many people. I guess all your GP/nurse would be interested in is how high your BMI is.

Therefore I would still recommend a trip to the surgery, to ask their opinion.

Catlady1976 · 19/02/2017 00:51

Hi. I had my 1St pregnancy as a size 14. 2ND as a size 16. Had an unplanned pregnancy at size 20 and tbh it was my easiest pregnancy. Yes I was made to feel bad with poor ultrasound due to maternal size on scan and because of bmi you will need x y and Z but actually it was my best pregnancy and delivery. Planned C-section. Good luck op x

PomBearWithAnOFRS · 19/02/2017 03:17

I had my PFB at 20 and weighed about 17 stone when he was born.
I went on to have four more children, was bigger each time, and was about 20 stone and 36 when my youngest was born.
They were all perfectly straightforward pregnancies and deliveries - the only complication was caused by a doctor's mistake and nothing to do with my age or weight.

RonaldMcDonald · 19/02/2017 03:33

I have two sil
One v thin one v fat, both very lovely ( for ease of descriptions)
Between them they have 7 nephews for me ( that sad niece free part of my life remains a secret )
Anyway neither had any issues except weirdly the v thin one was tormented by pre natal in her country of birth for the amount of weight she gained during pregnancy. She always lost it once she ceased breastfeeding.
Her last birth she had dreadful spd and was just unable to get around - she weighed sub 10stone.
Fat sil was expected by everyone she met to have problem pregnancies but nothing could have been further from the truth. She was given very grave warnings and dire lectures.

It's all such bloody nonsense and I am so unsure weight has as much to do with it as they say. I think there is confirmation bias so that any problems when fat are ah ha that is your fault and yet any problems when thin are poor you it's pregnancy

I wish there was more kindness shown

newyorkgirl · 19/02/2017 08:12

No problems here, BMI 31.
I have 6!Weeks to go until due date. had no issues what so ever, brilliant pregnancy, gained 5lb so far. Scans excellent quality. Don't want to sound smug but I can honestly say With only 6 weeks to go that I feel fantastic still doing everything I was doing before, I had the same concerns as you, of course I don't think being overweight is great it's not but I don't think it's hindered me once and i have had a fantastic pregnancy.

CherryLips1980 · 19/02/2017 08:28

V fat, first pregnancy I developed high blood pressure at 40 weeks, DD arrived at 41 weeks after a vv quick labour absolutely fine, just small. I was then readmitted a week later as my bp went stratospheric but was easily controlled by medication.

DC2 also arrived at 41 weeks, 2lbs heavier than his sister. BP behaved this time. And am even quicker delivery :)

Juanbablo · 19/02/2017 09:04

3 normal, healthy pregnancies. 2 of which I was overweight. The third labour was a bit tricky in that my blood pressure went up (had no issues during pregnancy) and didn't come down for 12 hours after birth. I had to have fragmin injections for a week after birth because it was my 3rd baby. All babies healthy and normal weights.

AllFurCoatNoKnickera · 19/02/2017 09:32

BMI of 34 for first pregnancy. Absolutely normal pregnancy and normal (but long) labour and delivery.

Only gained 20lbs during pregnancy. Hated being classed as "high risk". The consultant signed me off and quite openly said he didn't know why I'd been assigned to him. No high blood pressure, normal GT. No issues whatsoever.

Want to lose 5st before trying again, just because while the pregnancy was perfectly normal, I was so uncomfortable.

SpookyPotato · 19/02/2017 11:56

BMI was 39 at booking and had no complications, had all the extra checks just incase though. My BMI has somehow gone down at the end of pregnancy even though I'm still a chocolate addict.. C-section went well too!

peaceloveandbiscuits · 19/02/2017 14:50

After I gave birth last time I was 2st lighter than I was pre-pregnancy!

Kikikaakaa · 19/02/2017 15:00

I got giant when PG first time and gained 5 stone. It was awful on my back. Then I got PG again when DC1 was under 2, hadn't lost the weight and could hardly sit down, walk, sleep etc - my coccyx was absolute agony! Health wise no issues, no GD or high BP, just my joints and muscles. I so wish I had lost the weight and been able to enjoy it more.

Olympiathequeen · 19/02/2017 15:33

Whatever problems you had last time will almost certainly reappear in this pregnancy, but you will just be monitored more carefully so, in view of your age, I would do it now. You can still have a healthy dieting style diet when pregnant. Eating for two has long ceased to be believed.

Percephone · 22/02/2017 23:58

Reading with interest, as someone who is overweight and TTC.

Those of you who lost weight when pregnant, was that through hyperemesis or just eating carefully?

mellowfartfulness · 23/02/2017 00:36

BMI over 40 here, two pregnancies - the first one my BP was up and down, second time it was decidedly up, but high BP runs in my family and I still have it so we are pretty sure it's me rather than pregnancy related IYSWIM. Never any issues with diabetes or anything like that. DD was 8 lbs 9, DS was 7 lbs 8 and they were both born with a minimum of fuss. :)

I lost a stone and a bit each time (found them again after DD though :( ). Not through excessive sickness or any active dieting on my part. It just came off. I imagine it happened through a combination of eating slightly less when nauseous, calorie requirements going up a bit from growing a baby, and my body realising that it didn't need to gain like a slim woman needs to because I've got reserves to spare!

JorahsMissus · 23/02/2017 00:51

I was 15 and a half stone when I conceived my 4th baby. I craved fruit and fresh food so ended up losing weight all throughout my pregnancy.

However, I still ended up with gestational diabetes and could barely walk with how heavy the bump was and the pain in my back. I had mild SPD. I also had a label on my maternity notes which indicated I was a 'high risk pregnancy' because of my weight, it was mortifying but not nearly as mortifying as the trouble the midwives had when trying to put the heart monitor thing around my belly when I was in induction. My lower belly (the dreaded 'mummy apron' which didn't disappear when my bump grew which I had hoped for) held too much flab for the heart rate to be picked up properly so my induction was prolonged and various midwives on the ward fiddled about with it while muttering the area was 'too thick' to pick it up properly and basically making me feel like a whale.

Also after labour I developed a blood clot and was told numerous times by numerous doctors that it was mostly due to me being overweight during pregnancy and that I needed to lose a lot of weight to endure it never happens again (while they kept me on medication that caused me to gain nearly a stone in a month). I weight just under 15 stone before I had the baby and then was 14.3 within a few days of having her so I had lost weight through the pregnancy instead of gaining but that didn't seem to matter to anyone.

So as much as some people have great stories of it not affecting their pregnancy, I think you should just be aware that it CAN lead to some issues and be prepared for midwives and doctors to comment on it. Hopefully yours is nothing like mine and more like the positive stories on the thread but I think if you try to eat sensibly and not put too much weight on during the pregnancy it would be a benefit to you.

nursebickypegs · 23/02/2017 00:55

I'm 31, 5ft8 and about 14/15st. I like to call myself "well built" as I'm quite stocky and wide hipped!

My first midwife appointment was horrible. She weighed me and instantly I was put as a high risk patient with a BMI of 36. I was given a leaflet about how me being obese would mean that I wouldn't be able to see my baby on US, hear their heartbeat and my labour would be worse than average. I was told NOT to gain any weight during my pregnancy, and only have 1300kcal a day.

Now, I'm a nurse but I'm a sensitive one. I cried all the way home.

Next appointment I was weighed and I wasn't allowed to take off my doc martens "as she had ladies waiting". So I gained 1lb. Given slimming world leaflets and an another lecture. Left again upset, so decided to try the diet, despite huge advice against it from husband and mum.

16 week appointment and met an AMAZING midwife. She dipped my urine and found ketones and I explained everything what previous midwife said. She was horrified and ordered me to eat.

Im 27 weeks and I've gained about 7lbs, and still wearing pre-pregnancy clothes with the exception of my coat as I wear "fitted" peacoats. I met my OBGYN as my high risk and Baby Bicky has a heart condition, and he queried why I was high risk in the first place as your BMI has to be over 40! He was amazing and said "well your tall and stocky, course your BMI will be high".

My baby is measuring 29 weeks and is 1lb9oz. DH is 6ft3 and about 18st and everyone in our families are tall. I've come to the conclusion that I'll do what feels right for me. I eat a lot of fruit and veg and walk as much as my disability allows me.

Good luck xxxx

IrishTwin · 23/02/2017 11:16

Been fat with all 4 of mine, 4 perfect pregnancies, 4 normal uncomplicated births !

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