Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I'm sick and partner won't look after daughter

83 replies

smellyhouseelf · 17/02/2017 10:14

There is a massive back story, but it's basically what you've heard before about lazy partners and emotional abuse, but today I'm at the end of my tether. I started with a sickness bug last night and have been up all through the night with it. This morning, dd age 2 woke up at 5.30. After listening to her play on her own for a while she began to moan and shout for us. I asked partner to please get up with her. He went and opened her door and let her get in bed with us. There was no way she would go back to sleep and he went straight back to sleep ignoring me when I asked him to take her downstairs. So I got up with her around 6.15. He has only just got out of bed and has shouted at me saying I spoil her by getting up with her and it's not his fault I chose to get up. I am so sick of the way he treats me. Anyway I'm due to go stay with family this weekend, and I'm thinking of just staying there for good. Coming back next week with a van to pack my things. It feels like the last straw. But I don't want to tell him my plan until I come back to pack, as I think he will make it very difficult to leave. Family say I can stay with them with the kids until I find somewhere to live. Part of me feels guilty, so I really just need telling I'm doing the right thing. Am I?

OP posts:
LakieLady · 06/02/2018 20:02

Great update - you've achieved a hell of a lot in a short time, you should be very proud of yourself. Flowers

Ohyesiam · 06/02/2018 20:06

Wow op
I'm so impressed.

Longdistance · 06/02/2018 20:13

Well done op.

Out of interest did you puke in his shoes? 😂

smellyhouseelf · 06/02/2018 20:15

Thanks everyone. It’s so nice to read everything back and really see what was going on from a different perspective. I can’t believe some of the things I put up with from him.

OP posts:
smellyhouseelf · 06/02/2018 20:20

No I didn’t puke in his shoes. Would’ve been a great leaving present though if I could’ve managed it!

OP posts:
Getoutofthatgarden · 06/02/2018 20:21

Well done, glad to hear it's all working out for you.

How did he take the news when you left?

smellyhouseelf · 06/02/2018 20:30

I went back on my own the following week to collect some more stuff and told him. He went from angry, blaming me for not talking to him about it, to self pitying and ‘everyone leaves me in the end’, to begging he would do anything if i stay he will fix it (been there before).

Then eventually hired a van to collect my furniture etc just before I got the keys to my new place.

He has demonised me ever since as the bitch who stole his kids away. But I don’t let it get to me any more.

OP posts:
HolyBumoley · 06/02/2018 20:36

YANBU. One of the defining moments of my relationship with X (note X) H was when I was ended up in hospital with a perforated bowel. As I was recovering from surgery, he brought the 3 DC to visit me. They all started crying, and saying that Daddy had smacked them/shouted at them, and could they please come and sleep in hospital with me. I was on IV antibiotics, and a blood transfusion. This is one reason why he is now XH.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page