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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Feeling excluded by husband and sons.

70 replies

LovelyBath77 · 11/02/2017 19:24

Every weekend they do this. After dinner leaving me to clear up they go and choose some kind of boys film and watch it in the lounge. I could go and watch but find it boring and I'm never asked what I'd like to watch. I end up washing up, having a bath and / or reading. It's just a bit lonely. My sons are 8 and 11.

OP posts:

WanderLustingLane · 11/02/2017 22:20

Wow your future dils are gonna hate you!
Get back to your wife work in the kitchen

Original poster

LovelyBath77 · 12/02/2017 14:27

You know something, I actually quite enjoy the time to myself with the radio on doing the dishes, the time and space reading and having a bath. I am sorry that is is 'woman's work' but there we go. Husband does cook, hoover and clean, gives the children a bath and washes their hair and we do things in a fairly balanced way to be honest.

I'll get back to it, then.

OP posts:

GeorgeTheHamster · 12/02/2017 14:33

What was the point of the thread if it's all fine?

Atenco · 12/02/2017 14:56

How lovely for you, OP. You must have been very bored when you posted here though.

GinIsIn · 12/02/2017 15:04

Then why on earth did you bother moaning about it on here?

Hercules12 · 12/02/2017 15:11

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 12/02/2017 15:12

So you're not feeling excluded and lonely then?

I have a husband and a 13 year old son: fortunately DH and I love all the superhero stuff, so TV is genuinely a family affair (currently all loving Arrow, Flash, Agents of Shield...)

However, DS has also quite happily watched Legally Blonde and Sweet Home Alabama with me too

AllTheWittyNamesAreGone · 12/02/2017 15:19

You said you didnt like it but now you say you do.
Why start the thread

TatteredOwl · 12/02/2017 15:19

Ha ha this made me laugh

melj1213 · 12/02/2017 15:46

Even before the OP's bizarre 180 update, I honestly don't see what the issue was, beyond the ashing up being left to the OP. Yes the whole family could help out with table clearing, but if the OP doesn't speak up then she can't complain about getting left with it.

And as for the movie ... I honestly don't see the issue of a dad and his children watching a movie on a Saturday night ... if it doesn't appeal to mum then that's unfortunate but does it mean they can't have some quality time together without her, since she is the one who is deciding not to participate? You are more than welcome to join them, but choose not to because it doesn't interest you. You would be more than entitled to say one week you want to watch a movie on Saturday night, but if the three of them then choose not to join you because it's not something they would enjoy, you'd still be alone, just watching a movie while they do something else so nothing except your respective positions would change. If you watched their movies, even though you weren't a fan, then you might have an argument for saying "Right boys, I've watched your boy films (whatever they actually are) for the last month, it's my turn to choose the movie this week" but even then, if you don't enjoy it you have no obligation to stay just like they would have no obligation to stay the week you chose a movie.

Nobody has said you couldn't just be in the same room as them even if you're not watching the film either ... I will often have my book/knitting/laptop and just do my own thing in the same room as my friends/family so that even though I might not enjoy what they're watching, we can still have quality time together.

BertrandRussell · 12/02/2017 15:53

Why do 8 and 11 year olds need bathing and hair washing?

And why don't 8 and 11 year olds do the washing up?

Atenco · 12/02/2017 16:38

And why don't 8 and 11 year olds do the washing up?

I think it is because they have penises, Bertrand

BertrandRussell · 12/02/2017 16:47

Atenco- last time I said something like that I was taken to the cleaners.........

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 12/02/2017 16:48

Why do 8 and 11 year olds need bathing and hair washing?

Good question! I say to DS: Have a bath and wash your hair - it's not the most strenuous part of my parenting job, I have to say.

BertrandRussell · 12/02/2017 16:50

"it's not the most strenuous part of my parenting job, I have to say."

Lugging home the bags of "products" can be a bit taxing......

everythingshunkdory · 12/02/2017 16:55

Assuming this only happens once a week I think it's lovely they do a bit of bonding with their Dad (and you get to have an uninterrupted bath)

Atenco · 12/02/2017 17:14

I wouldn't normally be so crude, Bertrand, but the OP starting an AIBU to advertise her wonderful 1950s lifestyle just got to me.

TheViceOfReason · 12/02/2017 17:23

Bonus points for most pointless thread I've read today.

OP - it's not fair I get left to do all the washing up whilst the boys watch boy films

Everyone - so stop being a marytr and tell them to wash up.

OP - gets offended and says she enjoys it.

BertrandRussell · 12/02/2017 17:37

"I wouldn't normally be so crude, Bertrand, but the OP starting an AIBU to advertise her wonderful 1950s lifestyle just got to me."

It wasn't crudery that got me into trouble-it was objecting to collusion with poor helpless men...........

Original poster

LovelyBath77 · 12/02/2017 19:14

Well, I was feeling like that yesterday, but not so much today (shrugs) if it annoys you, feel free to ignore it.

(goes back to the 1950s)

OP posts:

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