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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to hate living in Coventry?

225 replies

Destinysdaughter · 08/02/2017 18:36

Inspired by the I hate living in Manchester thread, I lived in London for many years but moved back here as I had been made redundant and my dad had severe dementia and was going blind so I moved back home to look after him. He's now in a home because after 2 years, I couldn't cope with it any more. So I'm now living in a city I really do not enjoy being in. I find many people to be both narrow minded and overtly racist, there's virtually nothing going on artistically or culturally, the bars and restaurants are shit and its just dull dull dull. I feel like I'm just biding my time waiting to die here.

I miss London so much but I could never afford to live there now as its got so ridiculously expensive. I used to go back a lot but I've stopped as it made me feel too depressed. The job opportunities are v poor here in comparison ( used to work as a trainer for a charity ) and am struggling to find any meaningful, well paid work. Final moan, there's a real lack of decent, interesting, cultured men up here, so haven't met many guys on my wavelength. In London I dated men who were journalists, lawyers, architects, writers etc but up here most pp seem to work in the motor industry and I just have nothing in common with them!

Only good things about being here is that drinks are cheaper, air is cleaner and its an easy city to get out of!

OP posts:
IFartGlitter · 10/02/2017 10:18

I second that BertieBotts All of Warwick is perfectly livable. There are a few new estates but the area as a whole is very nice. St Nicks park is great for the children, the castle is on your doorstep, you're never far from some lovely countryside and we're very spoiled with excellent schools, both state and independent.

Emescote infants and Coten End are excellent state primary schools, both deserving of their OFSTED 'outstanding' ratings and reputations. Warwick prep, Warwick school, and Kings High are also excellent independents. House prices in the ' Coten End' catchment are 'eye watering' compared to Coventry though.

GeekLove · 10/02/2017 10:29

Also avoid Wellesbourne as according to my colleague who grew up there it really is '20 toe - land of the duelling banjo' territory.

SueGeneris · 10/02/2017 10:34

I would move. If you're not happy you're not happy. I've just spent 7 years being not happy somewhere and the relief to have moved is wonderful.

If you can't afford London could you do Bristol? It's a very vibrant city with a very strong sense of identity, culture, arts and was pro remain.

Destinysdaughter · 10/02/2017 10:47

I love Bristol!

OP posts:
Spudlet · 10/02/2017 10:54

Move. Seriously. Do it.

Life is short, you could be run over by a bus tomorrow and you'd have spent your time somewhere that you hate. It doesn't matter if it's fair that you hate it or not, it is what it is and you are where you are.

I speak from some experience as I grew up in a town near to Coventry that had been mentioned on this very thread as a shithole and I hated it. It took me a long time and a lot of goes to find my happy place but it was worth it, even if I am now a long way from my family. I miss them but I don't miss that place.

Make the change, do it, really. Don't regret the thing you didn't do!

beela · 10/02/2017 12:27

Nooooooooo!!!! Don't move to Sydenham, whatever you do!!

I agree with Bertie... the area in her map is good.

If you don't mind a modern housing estate then Warwick Gates is much better than Sydenham. Surrounding villages are nice too (I live in one myself).

ivykaty44 · 10/02/2017 13:30

Sydenham is the place to get drugs and stolen goods...

MrsT2007 · 10/02/2017 13:39

Live just outside Warwick, having lived in solihull for a few years. I'm not going back. Solihull is lovely but very snotty/new money and Warwick is lovely. I love it.

Great restaurants and pubs, close to Leamington for night life and easy to get to big cities to shop, but has all the charm and character of a provincial town.

Schools are good, it's a really friendly wee town, I'd recommend it!

Pleasemrstweedie · 10/02/2017 13:49

@iris65 @teacupinastorm - is it time for an Earlsdon meet up in the Oak?

GeekLove · 10/02/2017 13:56

Pleasemrtweedie

Could I come - only I'm not in Earlsdon but somewhere else in Cov. Go to Earlsdon quite often as my gym's there.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 10/02/2017 14:26

I enjoy the ring road. It gives me an excuse to shout at ditherers.

meganorks · 10/02/2017 14:37

Yanbu. Move. Plenty of places nearby that are much nicer

Ghosttownspecials · 10/02/2017 14:42

Isn't Kenilworth all brown boots and marmalade sandwiches...wink

What does that mean?Confused

Ghosttownspecials · 10/02/2017 14:48

Abby fields was a favourite haunt as a kid.... Outdoor pool.

BertieBotts · 10/02/2017 15:16

Ghost old people. Middle class old people.

CockacidalManiac · 10/02/2017 16:00

I thought you meant Paddington Bear. I was trying to see the link.

Iris65 · 10/02/2017 17:17

Pleasemrstweedie maybe. You never know we may already know each other!

Iris65 · 10/02/2017 17:19

teacupinastorm, geeklove I think it could be fun!

Ghosttownspecials · 10/02/2017 17:30

Today 15:16 BertieBotts

Ghost old people. Middle class old people.

Oh I see.Smile I'd fit right in.

SueGeneris · 10/02/2017 19:18

Please let us know if you decide to move. I agree that life's too short if you're not happy where you are day to day.

Move to Bristol!

ivykaty44 · 10/02/2017 19:34

Posh on the outside but poor on the inside cockacid

Destinysdaughter · 10/02/2017 19:35

Thanks all! Can't move right now as need to be near to my dad. He's got some health issues which means I often have to take him to the hospital as the care home won't do it. Maybe I should start up a book club or supper club to try and meet some pp here, as part of my issue is not knowing like minded pp to do stuff with.I've not lived here for 20 years so is a big adjustment!

Meet up in the Oak sounds fun...! Smile

OP posts:
DevelopingDetritus · 11/02/2017 08:34

I often have to take him to the hospital as the care home won't do it. They should do, what would happen if you weren't available?

emwithme · 11/02/2017 09:58

Ferret I love shouting at people on the ring road. Apparently I go round shouting "FUCKING MOVE FUCKING OVER YOU FUCKING NUMPTY" (or similar words).

Apparently it scared DH the first time I took him on there, we'd only been dating about 6 weeks, took him home to "meet the family" and had to use the ring road. 7 years on and he doesn't squeal quite as much but he definitely has a death grip and won't drive it unless I'm incapable!

Bristol is OK (it's my nearest city now, and I lived in it for five years). It's one of those places that looks great from the outside but the infrastructure is PANTS (especially compared to Coventry - and that's saying something). The schools aren't as good (there's no state schools that are as good as Finham), the roads are so car-unfriendly it's silly and are always full (see, it needs an inner Ring Road), everywhere is fucking uphill, but there is always lots on.

Xenadog · 11/02/2017 10:24

As a Coventry-kid born and bred I get sick of hearing about how terrible Coventry is. The city has always received bad press ever since the futuristic architects of the 50s and 60s decided to "revolutionise" the city. The recession of the 80s led to massively high unemployment and since then the various governments have not invested in the city to create the type of jobs the people of the city need.

Having said all this it is a city which has, and is still, rising from the ashes like the Phoenix which symbolises city. Go on a tour of the cathedral - it's quite humbling when you hear its history and what good work is still done today.

Like any city there are crappy areas where you don't want to live but there's lots of great stuff mentioned up thread which I won't bother to repeat. The ring road however is BRILLIANT! I have found it's the nervous drivers who hate it, anyone confident can handle it; it is such a quick way of getting around the city centre.

As for moving out to Kenilworth, Warwick or Leamington then don't forget how much more you have to pay to live there. Shopping is not amazing in all of these places (unless you're looking for an artisan bakery/butchers of coffee shop) and state schools are OK but the vast number of independent schools cream off the majority of top students. I'd also add that Kenilworth and Warwick have an older than average demographic - there's tonnes of very expensive retirement villages being built.

In a nut shell if you're not happy living in Coventry then fair enough, there are two things you can do. Either change your situation or, if not, change your attitude to the situation. In your case I think you'd have to do the latter, OP. Follow the advice from up thread about places to go and organisations to join - then come back and post on here about your experiences in a few months time?