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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that every child you have, brings new friends into your life

57 replies

LardLizard · 04/02/2017 23:36

Smile
OP posts:
DJKKSlider · 04/02/2017 23:39

Nope.

It brings parents of ypour kids friends into your life.
What if you don't like ypour kids friends parents?
What if you have nothing in common with them but ypour kids love reach other? Should you just be friends due to the fact your kids share geography on every second Wednesday?

I wouldn't know... I'm Buzz Killington and I have no friends. Grin

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 04/02/2017 23:43

Well no not necessarily. Just because for example the women over the road had her baby 2 days before me. Its not written in the book of the Lamb that We'd be best friends, and as for the cliques at the school gate. The only thing I have in common with those snotty caahs is that I had sex within the same year as themGrin

Only1scoop · 04/02/2017 23:44

No

Original poster
LardLizard · 04/02/2017 23:52

Oh yeah totally agree, you won't become great friend with someone purely because you have children the same age

Surely the law of averages has to come into play at some point, due to sheer amount of people you meet along the way, at parks playgrouos preschool then school
There will be sure to be a few good eggs on the way

OP posts:
DJKKSlider · 04/02/2017 23:56

Maybe it kicks in later but my DD is almost 4, been at stay and plays, nurseries and she started school nursery in September last year.
So far I've spoken to ERM? None of the mums at the school gates, none of the mums at the stay and plays, soft plays, play groups etc.

I've actually been looked at with judgement and suspicion, they mostly have this face: Hmm

I think I emit an aura of aloofness and cool.... Gf reckons I'm just a grumpy anti social misanthrope.... Same difference. Grin

engineersthumb · 04/02/2017 23:57

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Grumpbum · 04/02/2017 23:59

I've been out tonight for gin with my NCT lot 6 years down the line we can still drink gin and moan. I love them

early30smum · 05/02/2017 00:00

The way I look at it is, I have friends who I'd be friends with even if we didn't have our kids being friends in common. Then I have 'friends' who are only my friends (and I use that term loosely) because we have kids of the same age/at the same school etc. Once that's no longer the case, that will be the end of the friendship. I also actively make less effort to make close friendships with my second DC's friends mums because to be honest, I don't have time.

early30smum · 05/02/2017 00:00

However, saying all that, some of my closest friends are people I've met through having DC1.

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:02

DJKK... can't remember the rest
X posted but are you in engineering by chance?
The only reason I managed to procreate was that my wife works in a female dominated environment, she once described the engineering department by saying "the odds are good but the goods are odd"!

IMissGrannyW · 05/02/2017 00:03

Eurrrgh! At most of the PPs here... We were surprised and delighted at the friends we made through DDs friends, and continue to be so.

It was an unexpected bonus. As was the fact that after DD moved on, OUR friendships have lasted.

Thegiantofillinois · 05/02/2017 00:04

Ds has; made some goodfriends. Dd..nope. Parents won't even make eye contact. Ds is in a lovely class; Dd (5) complains that the boys are always fighting. The girls appear to be a volatile bunch (falling out all the time etc). Think I can see where they get it from.

DJKKSlider · 05/02/2017 00:06

engineersthumb

I'm a SAHD Grin

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:06

Imiss...
Small test...how long ago was the last time you heard from these "good friends".

DorcasthePuffin · 05/02/2017 00:08

I agree, OP. Having kids is a great way of meeting new people.

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:08

DJKK
When you return to work try software engineering:)

Hawkmoth · 05/02/2017 00:08

Four kids. No friends. Poop.

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:10

I would say misery love company... but my wife might find out!

IMissGrannyW · 05/02/2017 00:10

We went out last Friday engineers. (there's a class, we go every week) is that good enough? Does it count? We emailed today if it doesn't. (TBH, I sent an email, don't know if I've had a reply yet. Should I go and check my inbox?)

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:11

Some of the parents look as odd as the kids... dame that loss of internal monologue!

Sparklingbrook · 05/02/2017 00:11

At all the different stages from YR to YR4 I had loads of Mum friends as our DC went to school together. All fizzled out when they went to Middle School and no school gate stuff any more so arrangements weren't made.

I am on chatty terms with some of my teenagers' friends' mums now but don't see them socially.

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:13

damn not dame

engineersthumb · 05/02/2017 00:37

IMISS
Oo you're one of those socially functional people I've heard about, is the class on being disapproving of others by any chance...are you teaching it!

Araminta99 · 05/02/2017 04:13

No I don't think so. None of my friends are parents, I don't want to be friends with parents in particular, as often all they talk about is their children. I choose my friends on the basis of them being lovely and interesting.

AntiQuitty · 05/02/2017 04:52

Well so far having an autistic child means I haven't been able to see as much of the friends I do have nevermind make any new ones.

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