AIBU to find facebook depressing?

[Sunday999]

I've just flicked through a few pages, and now feel crap and lonely, even though I actually have a nice life.

I don't post very often, but I put something on yesterday, got lots of 'likes' but then realised that no one from work 'liked' the post, so I''m now feeling a touch uneasy, even though I only posted about a very innocuous family occasion. But yet again, FB has managed to make me paranoid!

I don't want to bin it totally, as quite a few groups I''m involved in are organised via FB, and it's a good way to keep in touch with people.

But I can't be the only person who feels inadequate and unpopular after reading FB?

Agree with Magic!
Got to lol at some of the trolls but then my blood pressure can't take too much so some people have been 'unfollowed' and I've had to remove the charity posts after so many comments like 'we should look after our own first' (as if we do that, not well anyway) and getting a 'maybe you'll be happier in Syria' comment when I pointed out that it's entirely voluntary to support a charity or not. (WTF?)

I would love to get rid of Facebook but I run a small businesses and get lots of custom this way.
It's depressing and addictive

I only set up an account to keep in touch with dd when she went to uni but we use what's app, Snapchat and FaceTime now. I never once posted anything, I am a very fortunate person, I have a busy social life, lots of friends and go lots of holidays. If I posted details of it I'd look like a boastful, arrogant dick 😀

I like Facebook. I mainly use it for messenger, but I'm also a member of a couple of politics/campaign groups and local groups - and I like seeing what my friends around the world are doing.

I also don't count likes when I post. If your self worth comes from how many people like your posts, I think you're problems are bigger than Facebook.

*your problems

I would love to get rid of facebook but I'm too nosy I get severe anxiety and depression and when it's bad I get very paranoid and have found Facebook makes me obsess and over analyse everything.

A couple of years ago I was on a day out with a friend and our kids. It was a difficult day with 2 toddlers throwing some impressive tantrums. My friend later posted photo's of our adorable little cherubs on Facebook (taken in the rare half hour where the kids had co-operated) and people commented how they loved the photo's and it looked like we'd had a great day. That was the penny dropping for me. It's a marketing tool and people are marketing themselves and their lives.... no one looking at those photos knows how exhausting and difficult that day was.

wyfofbathe
I agree

I am split 50/50 as to whether FB is a good thing. I have felt the way you do many times as a result of it.

Last week, because of what was put on a family members feed and when it was put on, a rift has been caused in the our family that will likely never heal. DH and I are now going to change our wills as a result and never speak to this person again ever.

I am not saying FB is a bad thing though because without it, we may never have realised the full extent of this persons feeling towards us so perhaps it's a good thing. The fact the person put on what they put on for the world to see, adds to the feeling of betrayal. I'm glad I know what I now know so maybe it's a big thumbs up for FB. It seems to take the good and bad of humanity and exaggerate it immensely. The internet generally does that though I feel.

The other way to look at it is that, in life generally, context is king. And what does Facebook lack completely? Any sort of context. As a result, as others have said, you see the smiling family holiday snaps...but you don't see the meltdown at the airport beforehand. You see the new car.....but not the panic over the monthly finance payments. You see that Sue and I have been out for coffee...but not that that was because I happened to bump into her on a boring rainy Wednesday in the NatWest.

If you're speaking to someone, you tend to adapt what you say to the particular audience. So - you don't brag about your new car to a friend who has just been made redundant. You don't brag about your children to a friend who has just had a failed cycle of IVF. And even on totally mundane matters, the conversation would go something like this:

Me: I saw Sue on Wednesday
You: Did you?
Me: I bumped into her coming out of the bank and we grabbed a quick coffee. She said it'd be great if we could all meet up - shall I send some dates round?
You: Great.

....and you'd go away with an entirely different perception of exactly the same event.....

I haven't looked at the FB news-feed for 24 hrs. I've only looked at our village FB page (someone recommending the new hair salon, and comments about the fab new chef at our local pub).

I'm feeling neither paranoid nor inadequate this morning, that's got to be good news!

I found FB very depressing and made me feel isolated and friendless. I stopped going on as much and now have deleted the app so I only log on once in eve to check notifications and have a little browse then I log off. I still have messenger on phone so don't miss msgs by logging on once a day. I find it much more balanced for me now

I'm just amazed at how many people share my views!

So glad it's not just me!

I''m so glad I posted, the responses have reassured me.

I'm just amazed at how many people share my views!

Sorry to put a fly in the ointment, but it seems there's a pattern and that you're just using a different platform. You are made happier by people agreeing with you, liking your statuses ... you're looking for approval from others.

(I'm also very bad at this, so I know where you're coming from)

I don't use FB at all, and that makes me happy.

I'm quite happy to accept that I'm the problem, not FB. It's been no hardship to stay away from it today.

Read "The Circle" by Dave Eggars