AIBU to drink 3 cans a night?

[2mammas]

For at least the last decade, I've drank at least three cans of Strongbow, most nights. Sometimes I'll decide I need to lose a bit of weight and go without for a couple of night but after two nights, I'm back on it. Somewhere between 2 and 4 cans usually.
I've got a one year old and for the time I was pregnant, I didn't drink. As soon as I had her, I was back on it.
Is this normal or shocking?
How do I stop?

Definitely not normal.

I would consider you you to be dependant on alcohol.

Try and stop, and if you can't, you need professional help.

Polly why steady on? You say that and then you say 'contact the AA"

What's the difference?

The word alcoholic is just a label....changes nothing about the persons drinking.

Not true. Alcohol dependency and having a problem with drinking are different so require different treatment and support.

The word alcoholic implies physical dependency for which detox is very dangerous. Having a problem with cutting down drinking is different and so should be termed differently.

I think you've had your answer, OP.

I think you now have to ask yourself if you and your liver want to be around long enough to see your child grow up and have a family of its own? Because at 3-4x the recommended weekly intake for women, week in and week out, you are actively risking some serious health problems down the line, problems that could be fatal.

If you seriously want to stop, get some help.

When my mil used to cut down it was probs 3 or 4 cans a day. I don't think she woke up one day and drank 16-20cans and then carried on every single day the same. I imagine there was what seemed like a 'normal' starting point.

I get why people are reluctant to throw the term alcoholic around. If you can't go without it though, there is a problem whether you are or are not an alcoholic.

Dp's ex BIL used to drink one or two a night with a whiskey chaser. Every night. Never really drunk but it was every night for years and years.

He has just had a liver transplant.

He is in his 50's and looks like he's in his 70's. He's frail and quite honestly looks dreadfully ill most of the time.

Anyone who can't stop drinking needs help. Telling yourself that you can stop if you want to and actually stopping is two different things.

Seek help.

It's highly likely he hasn't revealed to you the true extent of his drinking Mycatsapirate.

OP you really do need to give it a go before "seeking help". You need to understand how much you want it and how much you miss it and why you want it. What else do you think the GP is going to suggest?

OP I can't tell you whether you are dependant on alcohol or not.

I have a friend who is an alcoholic (diagnosed none functioning) she breaks my heart. I love her to bits but I know fine well il be attending her funeral with in the next few years.

It's so hard when it's someone you love. I really hope you can get some help.

This is just my person opinion not a diagnosis but that is a lot. If one of my service users were drinking what you are I would suspect a problem and refer them to the drugs and alcohol team FWIW

So that's 21 cans a week each containing 1.8 units of alcohol which is 37.8 units a week.

The recommended maximum is 14 units a week so you're well over double that, but also its recommended that you have at least 2 alcohol free days a week.

Having been someone who likes to have a beer or 2 each night I know it can become a habit, albeit it was a year rather than a decade for me.

To alter a habit you have to make a decision to adjust your behavior to make the change happen, and stick to it. First thing I did was to make an effort to have the 2 booze free days a week. I still wanted a drink but substituted lime cordial and tonic water instead. It was just something that was a little sharper than squash or cola so it felt different from an ordinary soft drink.

Once that was in place I swapped out some drinking on other nights until I was only down to the 7 beers or fewer.

I can have any soft drink now in place of a beer but some how deciding the lime and tonic was something special meant I saw it as a treat while I was trying to alter my behaviour. I'm not saying the same drink would work for you but if you can substitute something which you can see as a treat it will make it feel less like you are depriving yourself.

If you have become an alcoholic this approach may not work, in which case you will need to seek professional help.

Good luck with it!

I can't believe people are calling op an alcoholic
!

I don't think you're an alcoholic from what you've said but I don't know you. You stopped drinking while pregnant, an alcoholic couldn't do that without serious help.Check out the dry January threads. There are many people who drink at this level and far beyond. That doesn't mean it's a good idea to drink that every day. Maybe start with a couple of alcohol free days per week and go from there. Just posting suggests that you are concerned so it's worth taking it further. Good luck.

Darlink I actually agree.

2mammas my guidelines state 8 or more units continuously over a prolonged period of time is to be reported.

That's the policy not my personal opinion.

I, as a sober functioning alcoholic, suggest that if you are asking the question, you already know the answer is that you are drinking too much.

Try the DRY threads on relationships, or take a look at my guest post on the bloggers section, or my blog www.alcoholfree.2016.com

It's a very slippery slope ...

Lily 🌷

I think it's a lot. I find it's a bit shocking but not surprising - I know there are plenty of people that drink that amount.

Does your wife mind doing all the nighttime child care each night? Perhaps your drinking does affect her?

Unless the drinking is starting very late in the evening the OP isn't going to be over the limit the next morning either. Some right old 'experts' on this thread!

polly
She's drinking 3 cans. Not 3 bottles. That's twice what you described. And nobody drinks 330ml glasses of wine, that's half a pint!

Also is the OP male or female? That clearly affects the weekly units people keep citing.

Sorry!! I've just re-read the OP!

OP I don't think you're an alcoholic at all, really I don't.

However, it's a bad habit. Like smoking, or the people on threads who eat a packet of biscuits and a grab bag of crisps/ creme eggs, whatever, every day. Everyone has vices and people love to jump up and shout 'alcoholic'. If you accuse a person of being fat and unhealthy it's a different different story.

Just cut it out for a week and see how you feel? I think you would definitely see a difference in calories saved.

Strongbow comes out as 1.3 units per 300mls- that's a bottle. So 3 a night is around 4 units a night. (Same as a couple of glasses or wine, or less in fact.) Over 7 days that 28 units. This is twice the 'allowance' for a woman. But it doesn't equal alcoholism, per se.

Not sure about your numbers there. Depends on can size, no? The 440ml cans are 2.2 units each.

www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=274108990

If OP were having 3 of those a day, that's 6.6 units, or 46.2 units a week. That's rather a lot. There are also the large cans which are 2.5 units each -I should know I've drunk enough of them in my time. That would be 7.5 units a day, or 52.5 units a week. That's a lot.

I don't know whether you're an alcoholic or not OP but that stuff is bad for you. It's empty calories with a lot of sugar, quite aside from the alcohol content itself- and honestly, 46 units a week is storing up trouble if that's what you're on. I think you need to look at having an alcohol free day a week, going down to 2 cans a day and see how that feels.

What DanTDM said.

My SIL and DB for example share a bottle of wine between them and their flatmate every night but SIL told me recently it's more like 1 glass she has only.

^ and you think this indicates a problem?? 😂

My first gut feeling is that 'of course OP's not an alcoholic' because of what I mentioned before. To me it's normal drinking (although I don't drink like that daily since before I was pregnant). But does it really matter about putting a name to it? If it's affecting you negatively like your weight and you're worried enough to post about it, you've got a problem with drink whichever way you look at it. And you can do something about it if you want to.

Liver function tests may well be normal and falsely reassuring, it takes a lot of liver damage to raise them.