AIBU to drink 3 cans a night?

[2mammas]

For at least the last decade, I've drank at least three cans of Strongbow, most nights. Sometimes I'll decide I need to lose a bit of weight and go without for a couple of night but after two nights, I'm back on it. Somewhere between 2 and 4 cans usually.
I've got a one year old and for the time I was pregnant, I didn't drink. As soon as I had her, I was back on it.
Is this normal or shocking?
How do I stop?

No it's not normal and yes you should seek help

justme12345 you are also an alcoholic and need help. A liver function test might scare you enough into reality. You are drinking far, far too much and will be dependent and damaging your health and chance of a longer life with your child.

There's a webchat with the founder of Soberistas pinned to the top of Active at the moment too.

No one can diagnose alcoholism over the Internet, especially someone not qualified to do so. Please ignore the posters doing so OP.

Op well done in taking the first step to admitting you may have a problem..I think it'd be worth you seeking some real life help.
justme I'm afraid I agree with others that you are an alcoholic. It's difficult to take the first step in admitting it because you may be in denial and because it was normal for you growing up. But I'm afraid drinking that much makes you an alcoholic.

I grew up thinking that was normal and if I let myself I'd happily have a few cans a day. I restrict myself to weekends mostly. Could you try that?

I've lived with an alcoholic (I'm not saying you are at all) and it's only going to go one way without you wanting to change it. People slowly start drinking more and you could become one quite easily. No one naturally starts cutting back without effort.

I wish people would stop brandishing the word alcoholic around as if they were some kind of medical expert. Aside from it being a very dated term, only a professional and yourself can decide if you're alcohol dependent. Whilst 3-4 cans a night sounds a lot to some, if it's not causing problems in your job, relationships, and it's not causing damage to your health then you are probably not alcohol dependent. However, if you cannot limit your drinking to a level you would like then you may have a problem with alcohol. There is plenty of support available for this. Good luck OP.

train I disagree with you. The amounts the op is drinking EVERY night for a decade is worrying and that fact that she only stopped when pregnant proves this. What if she needed to take her baby somewhere in an emergency ? She wouldn't be able to drive? Or function properly? I know people do drink and so wouldn't be able to if they'd had a few wines on a weekend or something but every night is worrying! Same with just I think it's really worrying. Okay we may not be qualified to diagnose them but that's why I said they should really get some real life help

I'm by no means am alcoholic and would never be incapable of looking after my son

The two dont have to go and hand in hand. The Op is clearly alcohol dependent. As you sound too.

The quality or range range of the drink doesnt influence wether your are dependent.

Actually its quite easy to spot.

Not going a day without a drink or at least Not being able to go for a more than a couple of days. Drinking levels that are seriously damaging.

Its all there

Op, I would seriously reconsider your drinking habits.

I know someone who was drinking similar to you every night and ended up in hospital very ill with liver damage. It's a bit like playing Russian roulette someone could drink the same and be perfectly fine, whereas you might not be so lucky.

Thinkingblonde... The second post about drinking in the afternoons was not by me.

I have a wife who doesn't drink and doesn't have a problem with my drinking. I don't drink in the day and never before my little girl goes to bed. My wife always does the night shift looking after her.

It doesn't affect anything in my home life or work life and I really enjoy the few cans...

I want to stop drinking the calories but I enjoy the cider too much... I should aim for a few cider free nights a week...

Can you firstly try to cut down to 2 cans for a week or so and then 1 and then miss days out and do this gradually and see how you get on. If it's been 10 years you need to dwindle it down slowly at first I would think - good luck ... you're obviously not happy with it or you wouldn't have posted but you stopped when pregnant so you can - just do it gradually and know it's a step in the right direction to being more in control

Are you driving in the mornings? If so there's also the strong possibility that you're drink driving therefore not only putting your own health at risk but the lives of others.

Justme definitely alcohol dependant and in denial

Iost my mom to cirrhosis. She was diabectic and the sugar in the wine didn't help.the illness itself was barbaric. It was soul destroying. Before she had brain hemmorhage we found out she had thrombosis in main portal vein of the liver. She and dad worked hard and went to pub to relax. You can't tell people what to do but when peoples liver packs up, most don't get a transplant. My mom didn't get one because she was so poorly. We was told she probably wouldn't pull through the operation. She died 51 weeks after my dad. People do what they want with their lives but stuff like this tears families apart.

What's strong bow? Is it like knock you out to sleep stuff

Yukbuk you can disagree all you want, you are still not able to diagnose an alcoholic

You can't cut it out????
Or you don't want to cut it out???
Which is it?

Do you drink straight from the can, or pour into a glass? Just thinking that one way of cutting it back would be to pour out some cider into a smallish glass, leave the can in the kitchen and then take the glass to wherever you normally drink it. By having to go back and forth you'll drink less.

The word alcoholic is just a label....changes nothing about the persons drinking.a label dosnt make you drink more.or drink less..irrelevant..with or without the label the person still needs help to cut down

Also a fairly regular drinker here, but much less than I used to be. With me what really helped was hypnotherapy and a bit of self-understanding - I had learnt to respond to different situations through having a drink, and it had become a very regular habit I couldn't shake. As I said, I still drink, but definitely less, and with days off, and I'm very aware of the triggers that make me drink.
I used cds. Paul Mckenna and Georgia Foster are two names worth googling, but I'm sure there are others. Good luck!

My mil died at 51 from drinking cans of fosters. Her children are still young enough to need their mother. No children or marraiges yet.

It is so unfair. You will choose not to see this and your children will be in denial but if you carry on this will affect them more than you could ever imagine. The bottom line is do you want the drink or your children?

Your dp may make it look like she is happy doing the nights but i bet money on it that she does them as it is safer and she knows you need your cans.

I think it's a lot. As pointed out, it's well over the weekly limit. Did you manage to help out with night feeds etc when the baby was smaller? I hope you can cut back if you want to see your daughter grow up and live her adult life.

I try and give it up but then I want it, so I drink it. I don't drink in the daytime and rarely get drunk

Alcoholics often don't get drunk...That's because they are immune to the effects of it and simply need it in order to function.

Woah steady on with all these comments about being an alcoholic!

Strongbow comes out as 1.3 units per 300mls- that's a bottle. So 3 a night is around 4 units a night. (Same as a couple of glasses or wine, or less in fact.) Over 7 days that 28 units. This is twice the 'allowance' for a woman. But it doesn't equal alcoholism, per se.

I expect there are loads of women out there drinking 2x 330ml glasses of wine a night and not thinking there is anything wrong at all!

You need to cut back. It's your relationship with booze that is the issue- the 'needing it'.

I think contacting AA is a good move, or cutting back gradually as others have said. Reduce it to 1 can a night, then have at least 2 booze free days a week at least.

If you can't you need to see your GP and ask for help.

It's verging on alcoholism at the very least.

My SIL and DB for example share a bottle of wine between them and their flatmate every night but SIL told me recently it's more like 1 glass she has only.

I don't drink every night but when I go out. I did go through a stage where at a previous job because they went out and drank (sometimes the whole afternoon) I felt obliged to keep up, times that 2-3 times a week and that's a few units! I don't miss it now!

The only time I sort of thought I may have a problem (eg getting used to a new higher limit in job see above para) was when bookkeeper came out with us one summer's day and I'd happily drunk 3 Pimms and lemonade (along with boss who drank more than that) and whereas bookkeeper was feeling tipsy I wasn't at all! . But I managed to get it to a more even level after that.