Aibu to worry about my grip on reality?

[whosaidthatnow]

I happened to mention to dh today ( not in a serious conversation - just in passing) that I feel like I have to be careful what I say to people in case I mention something that is only true in passing. So I go through phases of being one type of person then another! With my beliefs and wishes changing accordingly!

So I get convinced of things then change my mind. So I try not to say anything which I know would confuse people when I change my mind.
If that makes sense! Because I don't know what is the truth or not. So for example I never mention things to say friends or family or doctors or teachers or anyone! Until I can be 100 % sure I am not imagining it...

Dh just looked at me and said "so you don't know what's real...?" Then actually backed off a bit...

I laughed it off and made out like I was being silly. But I wasn't!

I thought lots of people felt like this - but now I am panicking I am on the verge of going crazy.?

Aibu to be lying here worrying that this isn't normal now?

I'm not offering you a diagnosis OP because I don't know you and I'm not qualified. But a lot of what you are saying sounds familiar and I think you should talk to your GP who should be able to help you to work out what is happening with you.

Yes goaway generally normal apart from certain issues such as after having my last dd. Although I have never managed to hold down a job or anything. But I have been a sahm so people don't comment .

It does sound a little unusual. I think GP might be a good idea. As you can't tell us more we can't really understand, but it does sound a bit different to just changing your mind. I think the important thing is, is it bothering you? Does it get in the way? If not then maybe just ignore it, we're all made different. If you feel you have to work at hiding it, or don't want people to know, it gets in the way of enjoying life, then I'd say GP.

It's hard for us to tell what's normal and what isn't or to diagnose. Best thing would be to see your GP,and tell them exactly how you feel.
The hardest thing for us would be to decide what is real,what is reasonable and what's in your head.
Like the abusive example,it might not be completely true,but it wouldn't be unreasonable for you to feel that way if he was a complete dick. Or it could be true,but things changed and you convinced yourself you were wrong. Or it could be a complete fabrication of your mind/seeing completely normal acceptable things in your relationship through a different light. It's hard to say.

Sounds like anxiety to me. Completely normal to change your mind about things but not so much to avoid telling people in case you are inconsistent and they think badly of you. The neck thing sounds like anxiety too.

I can be the same...however I came of medication with out gp approval,and am well aware ,as is family and friends ,I need to be back on it...it's very easy to get ones mental health in a pickle..I find it best not to over think things...as you may be doing...and keep busy..even if that's just colouring,as I have just been doing

I can't even imagine what i would say to my gp . I don't exactly have a good track record there as I consistently refuse to answer questions or make follow up appointments . I just dont like going apart from when dd was a baby when I was totally convinced there was something wrong with her and went about 6 times in 6 months.

I think you sound confused, for want of a better word, I am struggling with what you're saying also, which wpuld indicate it's unusual as I'm not the only one, so I'd recommend seeing uour GP too and maybe explain to them what you've said on here.

You could write down what you told us here or even print off this thread. But - you don't have to. And they can't help if you won't engage.

The works have these mini suitcases in packs of three,that are black and white flowers...I use sharpies to colour them in...my mind is completely blank while I do it,so not worrying or stressing or eating...same with the gym..gives my mind a rest and my body a work out.

Is it bothering you op? Or impacting negatively on the life of you or people around you? If it is then I would say see the gp. If it's something were you've just started wondering if it's normal due to a passing conversation with your dh then maybe you don't need to pursue it. There are lots of different normals imo.

Been there.. (well sort of). Worn the T shirt ..
We can only understand the world as we see it and hear it through our own senses. Sometimes our perception of what we see is not always the same.

Parts of what you are describing sound to me like depression and anxiety or possibly bi polar but I don't think that covers everything you've mentioned. It's quite difficult to understand exactly what you're explaining which is not to suggest you are not explaining it well but rather that it is a complicated situation which isn't 'normal' (hate that word tbh but hopefully you know what I mean).

I think it may be best to write down a full description of how you feel (or print out this thread) and take it with you to a GP appointment. Or perhaps spend a month or so writing a daily diary and see if you spot any patterns wrt how you think/feel.

bum op said she thought she was being abused at one point and then thought her baby was ill

i think u need to seek help op-they will undestand maybe write it downlike u did here and they can go from there

I don't want to diagnose you- but my OCD sometimes manifested in similar ways. But elements of what you say sound a bit bipolar. I wouldn't panic- you're obviously doing very well at not letting this impact on your daily life - but I would see your GP for peace of mind.

(Also- you sound very interesting. I mean that sincerely.)

Obsessive thoughts? Cbt could help, see your Dr, show them this thread x good luck xx

She did. Intrusive thoughts are common with anxiety and being overanxious about your baby's health isn't uncommon with pnd/pna.
If it' not impacting her now why the rush to pathologise it? The op has said it came about in passing so not something she as previously worried about.

OP I'm sorry you're going through this. It sounds very stressful. Do you suffer from anxiety?
I am a bit daydreamy and live in my own world some of the time.
Do you have a young child? Some of the things you describe remind me of the thoughts I had when I had PND.
I think you should chat to your GP and be as honest as you have been with us.
I'm sorry not everyone has been supportive.
Good luck with it xxxx

Have you ever found something you suspected to be imaginary to actually been imaginary? Have any of your anxieties actually come to be correct in RL so for what have you ever worried that something was imaginary and then proved it was?

Is it that you are easily persuaded and it takes a while for your own opinions to surface?

I kind of get the same thing, but only when I have very bad PMT. So I'll became obsessed with splitting up with DH as I think he's done something so awful I can't possibly stay with him. As soon as I get a period I realise I've been completely irrational.
But this happens about twice a year, so not the same as you OP. I do think you should talk to your Dr.

Maddening - my dd wasn't ill , or dh abusive and I didn't break my neck .

I may be anxiety - I have loads of tics and weird habits that could go with that. I normally just not to show anyone!

Tbh I have worried about it - I get pain from tics and I am so changeable I never finish anything so never had a proper job or friendships etc.

I have 6 dcs and just try to get on with things without giving in to anything. The only time it's been obvious to others is after dd. Only because I keep picking at my arm without thinking .

I don't fully understand what you mean

But I can sometimes change my mind about things arghhh it's hard to explain ok a made up example - in a conversation about holidays I might state "I like to just go on holiday and sunbathe and do nothing else " and il fully believe that during that conversation but then maybe in a different conversation along the line someone will say "oh I love exploring on holiday " and il think be thinking yeh me too. I'm not lying at either point it's just maybe based on what I'm thinking or wishing I could be doing at that point . So is worry I then sound like a bullshitter which I'm not I just can change my mind quite a lot

Do you mean like that ??

You're probably just a bit anxious, and imaginative. Don't pathologise yourself. You sound fine.

In that case op I think a visit to the gp would be a good idea. But don't worry about whether you're normal. The majority of people will experience mental ill health in their lifetime so it's entirely normal! That doesn't mean you shouldn't get help to ease your symptoms though.