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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Or is this PE teacher unreasonable about periods

706 replies

BigSandyBalls2015 · 26/01/2017 21:32

DD(15) is doing GCSE PE. Part of this involves 'personal survival' which takes place in local swimming pool.

The school obv need to book this, can't just turn up, but DD queried what would happen if some of the girls had their period at the time. PE teacher (female) replied that they'd obviously have to use a tampon, they can't miss it, can't arrange another day. A few girls told her they didn't use/get on with tampons and she got annoyed saying they'd have to get on with it on the day as no other option.

OP posts:
misblink · 27/01/2017 07:55

My daughters friends father died a fortnight before her exams. She still had to do them! Having a period is a pathetic excuse for missing a gcse! If you can't wear a tampon then don't choose swimming as an exam subject!

Cheekybiscuit · 27/01/2017 07:58

Difficult one as ideally, you wouldn't let periods stop you doing things but not everyone gets on with tampons and for me personally, I am so heavy that when I have tried using super plus for swimming, I leak anyway! Confused

AllPowerfulLizardPerson · 27/01/2017 07:58

"Oh and to pass gcse pe the school could choose to do something other than swimming."

No-where has anyone said that swimming was compulsory. Schools have to offer a range of sports, for GCSE and of course you don't actually have to do the sport through school for it to be assessed for GCSE.

Though if OP returns to the thread, perhaps she will be able to confirm if her school takes a highly unusual approach to PE GCSE option choices.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 27/01/2017 08:02

misblink It is PE not specifically swimming - but don't let that stop you advocating that girls have to put something inside themselves at someone else's insistence...

SoupDragon · 27/01/2017 08:07

Would a teacher tell boys to use tampons? No.

Why do you think that is...?

SoupDragon · 27/01/2017 08:10

they can't miss it, can't arrange another day

So, OP, what is your suggestion as to how to solve this?

Reality16 · 27/01/2017 08:10

I think the teacher and the situation are both about discrimination. Would a teacher tell boys to use tampons? No. So she can't tell the girls to either. Discrimination haha just when I thought i had read it all on here.....

bloodyteenagers · 27/01/2017 08:18

Also how many would still be saying to force the girls use tampax if they knew that the moderator doesn't have to be present. So the 2 sessions is feasible as the session can be filmed and this submitted. Unless this bit has very recently changed.

mycatwantstokillme1 · 27/01/2017 08:20

Agree with poster who said the most frustrating thing with MN is that people can't see outside their own world and appreciate that other people have different experiences.

Really stupid to say things like 'well she shouldn't have taken GCSE PE then' or 'water provides a suction so don't put a tampon in'

Women should not have to explain why they either don't want to or can't use tampons or mooncups.

Can see the sisterhood isn't alive and well on this thread!

PS, YANBU, the teacher is

AnnieAnoniMouse · 27/01/2017 08:21

It's utterly ridiculous that the school didn't plan around this. Minimum of two sessions, strategically planned, girls get to pick which to attend.

As a teenager it took me a long time to be able to insert a tampon, but I swam a lot at the beach, so had an incentive to get it sorted. I persisted and got there, but previous to getting it sorted, I could for love nor money use one. I wouldn't have risked swimming in a pool without one.

For many years I was of the 'just use a tampon' if women (not young girls) said they weren't swimming due to periods.

Now, tampon or not it would look like a scene from jaws.

We live & we learn that everyone is different.

SuperFlyHigh · 27/01/2017 08:24

I used to wear tampons but didn't like them and had to stay off school sometimes as flow and cramps were that bad.

They don't have to do the sport no.

BalloonSlayer · 27/01/2017 08:25

The easiest medication for this would be to take packs of the combined contraceptive pill back to back around the time of the exam. I would not be happy with my DD of that age going on the pill for that reason, but it would be a short term thing I suppose and probably less hassle in the long run.

I suspect that the teachers did tell the class when they were choosing options that the swimming exam would be on one day only, and that it could not be rescheduled and if girls had their period they would have to take appropriate steps to cope - and that if this was not possible they should choose another sport. I also suspect that the girls just didn't listen. Or have conveniently forgotten. Or some of them may not even have started their periods when this conversation took place and wouldn't have imagined it even applying to them. I very much doubt this has been sprung on them out of the blue.

However it is worth an enquiry - when was it explained to the girls in advance so I can jog my DD's memory? Also to point out that some women struggle with tampons etc etc, is there any leeway for booking another day? (ie do any other schools do it, and could your DD join their day if necessary?)

My DCs school don't offer swimming as part of GCSE and I expect this is why! I can imagine that this teacher is someone who has never had any problems with using tampons and can't imagine why anyone else would and couldn't understand why the school didn't offer swimming GCSE . . .

MontePulciana · 27/01/2017 08:27

I'm on the fence here. I'd never have got my first job had I ducked out of the pool bit because I had a period. They are 15 now but will soon be adults so I'd try and make every effort to use the bloody tampon. Yeah they are fiddly at first but it just takes a bit of time. If we want equality in life and in the workplace we need to get over things like this. Or life guards/swimming instructors /cabin crew will all be male dominated jobs in a few years. Why would any employer hire someone who needs time off every month?

Miserylovescompany2 · 27/01/2017 08:32

"Misery maybe for you that when you swim or are in the bath that your bleeding stops, mine certinetly does not, and by reading others circumstances there's do not also.

That's the thing I hate about MN they cannot see out of their own little world, just because that's your experience of it, does not mean it's everyone else's."

You have taken my comment out of context. That's not all I said...

I also said that it would be embarrassing and humiliating if a girl had blood streaming down her thighs.

I agree with the others who said two sessions two weeks apart. Or an alternative activity?

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 27/01/2017 08:34

Yeah they are fiddly at first but it just takes a bit of time.

These aren't people going for jobs as lifeguards ffs - presumably if you couldn't use tampons/mooncups you wouldn't do that job anyway.

Read the thread - some people can't actually use them - not because they are 'fiddly' but because of genuine (and sometimes traumatic) reasons.

If it was about an item worn outside the body then I can understand it but to insist that anyone has to insert something into their private parts that they don't want to is all kinds of wrong.

myfavouritecolourispurple · 27/01/2017 08:35

I'm torn on this - yes periods should not interfere but they are a fact of life.

And I couldn't get a tampon in until a baby had come out, so I was about 31 when I first used one! And I still use towels, I only use a tampon to swim if it falls on a heavy day. So I think the PE teacher should arrange more than one day.

I have used a little bit of loo roll as a plug on occasion. But that obviously won't work if it's a heavy flow day.

AnneOfCleavage · 27/01/2017 08:35

All those posters saying why choose GCSE PE if you can't handle periods ( Glacinda & Luna spring to mind) have you thought that many of these girls would have chosen their options aged 13 or so and may not have started their periods yet or not realised periods can develop into heavier ones as you get older? I didn't start mine until nearly 15. & my DD is choosing her options now at age 12 & hasn't started either or any of her friends at 12/13 yrs old. Wouldn't have occurred to me not to choose PE & I'm certainly not suggesting my DD decide against doing it just IN CASE her period comes whilst on a swimming exam element. Ridiculous Confused

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 27/01/2017 08:36

I'm actually really disturbed by this thread. And I'm saying that as someone who rolled their eyes on the other thread about six year olds crying with the cold in PE

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 27/01/2017 08:37

We had to do PE at school up to leaving - it wasn't something that was on the options. Luckily they stopped swimming before most girls started their periods

Anothermoomin · 27/01/2017 08:46

I love the way non teachers say "arrange another date" like it's that easy. Pools are booked up years in advance during term time, they were probably lucky to get the slot they did. It is so disheartening when you have struggled to organise something and a trail of students tell you they can't do it for various reasons. Teachers can't solve every issue, they are not miracle workers. Have you worked with teenage girls, do you really think another date would solve the problem?

Obviously alternative arrangements for other activities will be organised but you can't always get what you want. My son had a bad cold during one of his GCSE PE assessments, hard luck get on with it.

mycatwantstokillme1 · 27/01/2017 08:50

Why should young girls have to go on the pill just so can they can swim on their period? Do people understand how dangerous the pill can be?

As for 'If we want equality in life and in the workplace we need to get over things like this. ' I'm almost speechless. Maybe you've always had light or manageable periods but a lot if women don't. Why should we have to put dangerous chemicals in our body so we get equality? Nobody's mentioned toxic shock syndrome (apologies if anyone has and I missed it) which can be caused by using tampons.

I'm so angry I can't be articulate, telling girls that they just have to suck it up and learn how to use a tampon is just wrong on so many levels. As is 'don't wear any, the water acts as a suction'. From those of us who bleed/have clots in the bath shows what a load of shit that is.

SoupDragon · 27/01/2017 08:50

The easiest medication for this would be to take packs of the combined contraceptive pill back to back around the time of the exam.

Or norethisterone if over 16.

mycatwantstokillme1 · 27/01/2017 08:51

Having a bad cold is completely different to not being able to use a fucking tampon to stop blood flow and just getting on with it, anothermoomin. I have to go, I can feel my blood pressure rising!

SoupDragon · 27/01/2017 08:52

telling girls that they just have to suck it up and learn how to use a tampon is just wrong on so many levels.

Well, it's either learn to use some kind of internal sanitary product, take drugs or let periods interfere with what you want to do.

Which do you suggest?

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 27/01/2017 08:55

Sometimes periods DO interfere with stuff - great if it doesn't but it's not always practical. This isn't about wearing a layer of clothing ffs - it's putting something in their bodies.

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