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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to find it annoying that dh didn't laugh at my joke?

95 replies

Asuitablemum · 24/01/2017 22:06

Put dd to bed and went downstairs. Dh called me into front room to ask me something about our diaries. He had the computer open and I guess was doing a bit of admin. We chatted a bit about the kids. Then I said, oh I Heard a comedy sequence earlier that I thought you'd appreciate. (He is always quoting snippets of a particular comedian he likes). At this he started looking at the computer. So I said it will only take a minute. So looking at the clock, to mentally time it, he turned his attention to me. I told the radio joke, probably quite badly. He looked unimpressed and condescending throughout. Then commented at the end 'I'm sorry I don't find that funny, I've heard those shows before and they're quite weak. Told me a couple of reasons it was a bad joke. And said...The comedy is more in the line of X show (which he doesn't get but I found funny the one time we saw it).' Then when I looked annoyed he saId 'sorry, I am just not In the mood when I'm in this room/in work mode. You need to catch me at X time.' I just found the whole exchange really annoying. Would it have been so hard to say har har? Or was it annoying of me to badly retell a joke? (Not something I do regularly).

OP posts:
IRegretNothing · 24/01/2017 23:05

I dont9want to overthink it but it was actually an incredibly sweet gesture of you. You though of something he would lime and gave it to him, like a little present and he shat on it and you.
Isn't the action of doing something sweet for your dp to cheer them up or make them smile that shows you were thinking of them kind of the cornerstone of romantic relationships? Kind of, I saw this amd thought of you, or here's something to make you smile. It was you attempting to make a brief connection with him and share a little giggle together.
I don't want to sound all pseudoscience-y but that's exactly why we do that for our partners isnt it? To co nect, to show love and care? Even if we feel a bit self concious about reciting a joke to them.

IRegretNothing · 24/01/2017 23:06

Scuse typos-phone!

user1482443190 · 24/01/2017 23:07

I think it's pretty disrespectful on his part - almost an excuse for saying 'nah, I've got an excuse for not giving a ....' I think, if a friend was to tell a crap joke, you'd acknowledge it much more politely, as a friend, you'd not want to hurt their feelings and be more thoughtful in your response.

Asuitablemum · 24/01/2017 23:13

Thanks for all the comments, that's how I felt I regret. And for all the jokes. We need a jokes thread methinks.

OP posts:
user1478860582 · 24/01/2017 23:15

Some of you are completely bonkers! OP tells a joke, OH doesn't find it funny for whatever reason and the some of you are suggesting OP pays him back by not laughing at his jokes?

Are people really this petty?

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 24/01/2017 23:35

What's blue and fluffy?

Blue fluff.

What's red and fluffy?

Blue fluff holding its breath.

Kills me every time...

Blush
MrsDustyBusty · 24/01/2017 23:50

He sounds like the actual craic.

melj1213 · 25/01/2017 04:06

He was clearly busy with work, and only called you in to double check some info, and then you decided that that was the perfect time to randomly (and badly) retell a comedy sequence, that even you admitted wasn't actually that funny, and wonder why he wasn't impressed and was, understandably pissed off?

If it was the other way around, I bet people would be saying that you don't have to humour your DH and laugh along for the sake of it.

^AIBU?

I was trying to work this evening, and called my DH into the study to ask him about the arrangements for some appointments we have in our diaries. I was really busy and trying to get on, so once I'd clarified the info, I turned back to the computer. My DH decided that was the perfect time to want my attention and try to retell a really bad, unfunny joke sequence. She said it would only take a minute, but I was tired and trying to get this work done so I could relax, especially when I looked at the clock and saw it was already getting late.

The joke itself was bad enough but my DH's delivery was just painful to sit through, and I really can't hide my expression when I'm unimpressed, but at the end I wanted to soften it a bit by explaining that the problem was that I just didn't find it funny, even when I heard it the first time. She then got a really annoyed expression, like I'd done something wrong by not finding it funny! So I just told her I wasn't really in the mood for jokes because I was busy and clearly this was not the time to try and tell them, and perhaps she could save them for later in future. Now she's upset with me for being straight with her, but I'm just trying to get the admin done so I can enjoy the evening, without interruptions. AIBU to want to work uninterrupted by crap jokes that could have waited? AIBU to find it annoying that my DH expected me to laugh at her joke and got upset that I didn't?^

PollytheDolly · 25/01/2017 04:49

My DH2b likes to share funny stuff as do I. I am crap at laughing if it don't find it funny BUT I do try but he can see right through it.

He says "I guess you had to be there..." Grin

Mummyoflittledragon · 25/01/2017 05:15

He seems to like to make you look bad to make himself look good. Don't be fooled by it. He probably has very low self esteem.

Truckingalong · 25/01/2017 05:26

In what other ways is he grumpy and bad humoured OP?

NightWanderer · 25/01/2017 05:45

It was probably just a bad time. It drives me crazy when people talk to me when im trying to work.

Believeitornot · 25/01/2017 05:45

He was working and he apologised.

You should have got the hint before you reeled off the joke...

Boomerwang · 25/01/2017 06:07

Try telling a joke to a Swede. They don't get jokes at all. Their favourite jokes are puns. I haven't had a good laugh since living in Sweden, so thank god for mumsnet.

AllTheBabies · 25/01/2017 06:29

God, he sounds like a pretentious asshat.

Not laughing at a joke is fine, maybe he just didn't find it funny. But did he really need to try to make you feel so small and stupid in the process? Ugh.

TheNaze73 · 25/01/2017 07:59

Comedy is all about timing & yours was poor.

Ladyformation · 25/01/2017 08:21

I think YAB a bit U, for the reasons posters have given above.

Just on the "looking at the clock" thing - if I'm working and DP or anyone else needs to speak with me, I always check the clock before I look away from work, because I'm often on chargeable time which is measured in small increments, and need to know when I paused so I'm not falsely charging my client. It's not because I don't want to talk or am graciously bestowing you with my precious time.

SquarePegRoundHole · 25/01/2017 08:27

I'd say he was in some kind of bad mood OP

Tickle him into submission Grin

Asuitablemum · 25/01/2017 08:30

I do think that's how he would have left mej. But I do think it's a bit selfish that he can always decide exactly when is convenient to him. So he calls me in to discuss what he wants then I am dismissed.

OP posts:
picklemepopcorn · 25/01/2017 08:35

Gosh, hard to retell a funny story when someone has put you off and checked the clock... Yabu for telling it then, I think.

YWNBU to never listen to any of his tales again, and blank him when you are doing something else- cooking, watching tv, driving. Sorry, I can't listen to you right now. Tell me later.

Believeitornot · 25/01/2017 10:56

Does he call you in to discuss when he's working?

Is his job quite stressful? If so then no wonder he's grumpy if you keep disturbing him.

Katy07 · 25/01/2017 11:18

I'm not sure that it's only the husband who's had a sense of humour failure... Hmm
Personally I prefer the blue fluff type jokes. What do you call a blind dinosaur? A d'youthinkesaurus. What do you call a blind dinosaur's dog? A d'youthinkesaurus rex.

Asuitablemum · 25/01/2017 11:45

He has got a stressful job but he wasn't working. He had returned from work, he was just doing some bits on the computer and he called me in to start the chat.

OP posts:
FlopIsMyParentingGuru · 25/01/2017 11:49

On a lighter note. I also love the donkey sequel.

What do you call a donkey with three legs and one eye?

A winky wonkey

NavyandWhite · 25/01/2017 11:49

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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