To not agree with this amount of homework or awards for it?

[Skatingonthinice16]

Ds is 7 and a younger year 3. They've just been given their first big project. We have six weeks to do it and there are 15 tasks all of which take at least an hour and some - like the one we did last week - take several hours and a considerable amount of resources. This is on top of spellings, reading, numeracy homework.
So that's my first moan. Too much I think. Plus without significant parental support they aren't going to be able to do it because of the range of the tasks involved.

However my biggest issue is that on top of this school have decided to give prizes to the 'best' three projects - considering creativity, effort and presentation. Now aside from the fact ds is dyspraxic and his presentation is not good (we will use the computer for some of it admittedly) I just feel that a) it ramps up the pressure and b) what about the other 27 kids who've worked hard but don't get a prize? Why can't they have an end of topic celebration for everyone where they look at each other's projects and have some golden time or something? I just think this is too much. Ds is already crying and saying his won't be good enough to get a prize. He's very competitive and a perfectionist (ASD strongly suspected) and he's already decided his project won't be good enough. I've talked to him about effort etc but he said it doesn't matter how much effort he puts in, he won't get a prize and he's more than likely right.
Why bring prizes into it at all?

This is a good state school by the way. Not private or anything.

Aibu?

Not just my kids school then GahBuggerit
Surely it cant be that hard to tell which work is good for that child and which work is good because a child has been nowhere near it.
My favourite was in infants when dd's class had to find stuff out about a topic and write about it. One child came in with, I shit you not, a Powerpoint presentation. That they could neither present or read. And guess who got the prize?

I have a 2 year old and even thinking about homework projects makes me very anxious. Kids don't learn anything if their parents do it for them. And with projects needing parental input how am I, a single working mum, supposed to help my child as much as say a sahp?
I also think schools (especially primary) should encourage learning and fun, rather than just doing something for competition.

Primary school level homework measures only how much parental input the parents are prepared to put in, not the child's own work ethic or ability.

We live in a world where children/young people are constantly being told they need to be a cut above everyone else in order to achieve, that they must have extra-curricular activities to add to their CV. How on earth children are supposed to partake in these activities, plus complete daily spellings and reading, plus set hours of homework (which in reality always takes longer than expected), plus actually finding time to do the normal day-to-day things of eating, bathing, taking some form of fresh air, and getting adequate sleep is beyond me. No wonder we have unprecedented levels of anxiety in our nation's children - we are simply asking them to pack in far too much in too short a space of time.

I never had homework other than spellings and timestables until I went to secondary school. I went to an average primary and a comp in a rough area. I somehow still managed to achieve two degrees and a professional job as did many of my school friends.

Hate this homework culture. And I hate the attitude thst kids should just get on with it.

Why can't a 7 year old switch off when they get home? Why can't they play? Or see friends?

I'd tell the school how angry I was and refuse to do this.

Homework at this age should be no more than 20 minutes a day and legally is not compulsory.

In the case of your son OP, it should also be differentiated. My son has ASD and we have similar struggles. It's not that he doesn't want to do his homework, it's that he wants it to be perfect and struggles to retain the pertinent information.

Sometimes I stop him after doing the first 'challenge' as they're called. Other times if he is handling it well we will do all the challenges under the agreement that practice makes perfect. He only gets one piece per week, it is assumed they will read at his age (yr5) and spellings and times tables are to be practiced regularly but they don't set it as homework.

I have always praised effort over achievement, which works for DS and he now knows as long as he is trying his hardest he will be praised for it.

I still have to sit with him for big tasks. Smaller pieces I will leave him to it, check for errors and ask him to try again, like they do in class. I helps him to have this routine. I had to do this as he got lazy, learning that if he played dumb the TA and me would do his work for him.

I think for you average child a 6 week project at this age isn't demanding, but for your DS there should be some leeway. But at the same time, school just let missing or incomplete homework slide with my DS, as long as I added a note saying we'd stopped after x amount of time or because of distress. Because there were never repercussions DS is more willing to complete his homework now.

I could leave DS alone completely with a making task - he is very creative. In the holidays they asked them to do 'a project' on their theme topic but it could take any format they liked. DS took the opportunity to combine his love of the topic and making videos and now has a fab video on YouTube. I held the camera, but everything else was his doing. There were no prizes, but he got a headteachers certificate for it. Sometimes you have to just roll with the punches and work with their strengths.

I have no problem with homework that is reading, spellings, times tables or a bit of work to support something that they are learning in class. It has to be age appropriate and the child should be able to complete the task with minimum supervision.

Projects and competitions are just for parents to show off their superior parenting skills. They are the cause of stress and arguments in many households and do little to support learning IMO.

Our rule is that we always ensure that whatever homework is set by the school is completed, to the absolute best of the children's ability. We as parents will assist in a minimal way to ensure that the project, craft etc is all the children's own work.

However in lots and lots of other families the parents have clearly done substantial amounts all of the work.

As a result, my DS who is otherwise top of the class has never won a prize for this kind of thing.

My children find it deeply frustrating that prizes are effectively given for the parents' work, but we've taught them to take pride in what they have achieved. We point out that they actually learned something from their project while others may not have.

What do you mean "we" have this project? It's his project not yours

This always really pisses me off on mn.

dd (9) had a project over Christmas which was to make a piece of chinese art work, suggestions given.
So for her to do it herself....

1. Turn of screens, remove distractions, and insist that yes now is the time for homework. (do not underestimate the length of this protest session)
2. Ask them what they want to make. Cue a long time of them looking at pictures and deciding. If you leave they go off task. If they need the internet for this step, you need to be around as they are 9 and have no idea what they may get when they google. They decide. You then have to put sensible questions about who they are going to make a dragon with available materials, without squashing her creativity.
3. OK she has decided what she wants to do. Then I have to find the necessary art supplies. I am not a classroom, so they are not all laid out ready. Ask her what colours, which paint, card? paper? foil? She chooses and I get it all out. Make sure she has covered table in newspaper. Start cooking dinner while keeping an eye.
4. dd asks for help. Without doing it for her, I give help. eg Mummy I can't draw the head. Me, why don't you draw round something, like a plate to get the shape. dd then has a go. Mummy, I want the eyes to pop out. Me - how about putting something behind them like some card?

Continue for an hour. Dd has had enough, but it isn't finished.
Tomorrow, repeat until finished.

To facilitate them 'doing it themselves' they need support, and it can be a long drawn out pain in the neck.

can I also just say - it is NOT always obvious what the parents have done. I remember a lovely family with 2 boys. Boys really struggled in school, but were very arty and creative. There was an easter bonnet parade. They had made the most amazing huge papier mache eggs. They modelled them round a large balloon, then cut a shape out of the front, painted them and filled them with eastery type things. Then cut a hole in the bottom for their heads. They were amazing. I knew the mum well and she said they and done it all themselves. (and I could believe it) They were hands down by a mile the best thing in that parade.
Did they win? No. Why? because the judges assumed the parents had made them.

I was really cross on their behalf, because they really could have done with the boost of getting a prize in something.

My dd can, at times also produce some really high quality stuff, if she is motivated. She asks me for suggestion - Mum how can I make the gold bit show up? Me- hmm, how about outlining it with black pen? Is that 'done by the parent?' I don't think so, but it does up the quality of the finished product.
Her stuff occasionally looks like it has lots of parent input. It doesn't.
I don't care because there aren't any prizes and she knows she did it.

I used to get regularly accused of having my parents do my homework for me - particularly in English and art. So I didn't get a lot of awards either (and frequent accusations from teachers that I was cheating, even when class tests showed this wasn't the case). My parents wouldn't let me do anything but my best though. DS has produced some great creative projects, all his own work, but is often passed over, either for those who've had extensive parental help, or for those who've obviously had no help. Poor kids treading water in the middle!

Teachers should know when there has been excessive parent help though as they know what the child can do unaided. If a reception child struggles to hold a pair of scissors then comes in with a craft project with all perfectly cut edges it's a safe bet they haven't done it themselves. I'm surprised the creative boys a pp mentioned were accused of having their parents do their Easter bonnets. Surely the teacher would be aware of what they were capable of making at school?

15 hours on one project? At 7? That's a lot of prep and advance planning for the teacher too. It's normally a crush at the photocopier to run off 20 sums etc here, this sounds epic in comparison. What's the feedback from other parents? I'd be saying no I think.

I have similar issues with my DS now 8, we have a system that works for us. He tells me what he what's to say. I type it up for him, mix fonts, colours etc up. He chooses his favourites and cuts and sticks info out onto large card poster. We then pick something that doesn't have to be built by him, an experiment he can buy and then demonstrate, a paper mache volcano he can paint and customise. It obviously depends what the project is based on. It costs more but he is happy with the way his projects looks and hasn't got too stressed doing them. There are no prized thank goodness just an open parent afternoon.

YANBU. That's far too bloody much. Theyre in school all day. Its no wonder so many Children are school phobic or rebel against it.
All very well teachers saying, but. I still have to work when I get home, but. They chose that profession.

bums - the judges weren't the teachers, they were invited in, probably chair of governors etc. and they hadn't done much large scale creative art that year at school. In fact the art work at that school was pretty uninspiring

Fair enough if it wasn't the teachers judging. It does pee me off when teachers pick the best project though. When they must know full well that it's only the best as it's been completed entirely by an adult rather than a 6 yr old! If they're going to give a prize for adult homework it should be wine

The amount of time they expect you to dedicate to all of this would irritate me but the prizes part wouldn't

Yanbu, at 7 it's craziness. That sounds like homework for 13 year olds. I have a 5 year old and their homework is ridiculous too sometimes. Apparently they're supposed to do as much of it as possible independently. So my 5 year old who can barely read or write has to independently research a particular style of artist? I completely fail to see the purpose of it.

Even if the kids are all doing the work without parental help (very unlikely) the idea of turning academics into a competition is ridiculous. There are plenty of naturally competitive areas of the curriculum (e.g. sport) where they can win prizes etc. but turning a project like this into a competition is ridiculous. It might be motivating for the top 20% of students who have a chance of winning but it is incredibly demotivating for the majority who know they won't win and will feel like all the effort they put in was wasted as they failed to win a prize.

If you must do a big project why not just display them all at the end and have everyone admire everyone else's. All the children who put effort it can then be proud of their work.

Oops Welcome to the Not Giving a Shit Club

Now if everyone can master the same over Sats we could be getting somewhere.

Now if everyone can master the same over Sats we could be getting somewhere.

Minimum wage jobs?

DD is certainly not earning minimum wage and she didn't even take them.

On course to buy her first flat as soon as she turns 18 from money she has earned over he years.