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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be sick of my ultra healthy friend

98 replies

LeFemme1 · 15/01/2017 12:14

Whatever I buy she has a problem, I brought the dc Krispy Kreme s as a treat and she says her dc are not allowed trans fats. This is repeated when it comes to things I myself or my dc eat.

I had the biscuits out when she was here and when I had one she started ranting about the preservatives and sugar in them and how sugar is addictive like drugs. This is repeated with alcohol on a night out as well.

Aibu to tell her, her advice is not needed.

OP posts:

Bluntness100 · 15/01/2017 12:59

Hnmmm, yes she is a pain in the arse and yes tell her to button it.

I don't think the poster commenting on Krispy Kreme should be hammered though, and yes I get the irony, however it's true that shite food should not be portrayed as a "treat" . Eat it if you want, feed your kids it if uou want but please don't teach them it's a "treat"because that's what leads to issues later in life.

How many people do we see post on mumsnet trying to lose weight but talk about having a house full of "treats" . It's not a treat, it's junk that it's fine to eat occasionally and in moderation. It is not a treat.

Sorry but no one should be teaching kids that eating unhealthy shite is some sort of treat.

VanillaSugar · 15/01/2017 13:00

I have a friend who is preaching in FB about becoming a vegan. And the family are also gluten free. And no, they can't possibly eat another animal product again.

I am never ever going out for lunch with her again.

Gardencentregroupie · 15/01/2017 13:06

SIL is like that. She nearly popped with shock when DD (18 months then) took one sweet from the jars DMil laid out last year at Christmas, but whenever I see her kids (almost always at birthdays Christmas etc) they're scarfing down the junk food like there's no tomorrow the second her back is turned. Boring to be around and ultimately counter productive to be that restrictive.

SlothMama · 15/01/2017 13:07

YANBU Fair enough if she wants to eat healthily then that's her life choice, she shouldn't force it on others!

BishopBrennansArse · 15/01/2017 13:09

ASDA iced ring donuts are far nicer than Krispy Kreme and you get 12 for £2

NavyandWhite · 15/01/2017 13:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LunaLoveg00d · 15/01/2017 13:09

Is she Davina McCall?

Tell her it's none of her business what your kids eat! I am firmly of the "everything in moderation" camp when it comes to a child's diet.

Katy07 · 15/01/2017 13:18

Gregg's jam donuts - much better. Probably full of trans fats (is it still politically correct to call them "trans" fats?!) and definitely loaded with sugar but they taste so good. Buy a pack and offer her one, then pull the packet back quickly saying 'oh no, you can't enjoy these can you'

WorraLiberty · 15/01/2017 13:21

How many people do we see post on mumsnet trying to lose weight but talk about having a house full of "treats". It's not a treat, it's junk that it's fine to eat occasionally and in moderation. It is not a treat.

Sorry but no one should be teaching kids that eating unhealthy shite is some sort of treat.

I disagree.

Once people stop calling a treat a treat, it often becomes part of their everyday diet, rather than something to treat yourself to occasionally.

And WRT to teaching kids, I think they need to know that what they're about to eat is unhealthy shite - therefore they should eat it only as an occasional treat, rather than every day.

MrDacresEUSubsidy · 15/01/2017 13:24

So tell her. Be nice but firm.

It's great that you are so committed to your way of eating but I actually find it really rude that you keep lecturing me about my choices when I haven't asked for your opinion. I don't want this to come between us but I would be grateful if you could stop bringing this up as it is incredibly annoying when you do.

If she froths and kicks off then it's a quick lesson in avoiding her as a clean-eating bore. However hopefully she'll be a good friend and realise that there are some things where you just have to agree to disagree.

Carnabyqueen · 15/01/2017 13:25

Yes, she's annoying and rude. Tell her nicely that you'll eat, drink what you like and make similar choices for your kids.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 15/01/2017 13:27

I think treat is getting confused with reward. I would refrain from continually using food as a reward for a child.
To label unhealthy foods as occasional treats seems fine.

joystir59 · 15/01/2017 13:32

YANBU, Your friend is being rude.

SymbollocksInteractionism · 15/01/2017 13:32

YANBU I think I'd be tempted to up the junk food ante when she's there just to outrage her. Do you think a pie on a roll , coca cola, tube of pringles and fudge donut would have enough fat, sugar and crap to suitably piss her off??

Bluntness100 · 15/01/2017 13:32

Once people stop calling a treat a treat, it often becomes part of their everyday diet, rather than something to treat yourself to occasionally.

Deadsouls · 15/01/2017 13:32

YANBU

SymbollocksInteractionism · 15/01/2017 13:33

Maybe add a pot noodle too? 😂

TheMartiansAreInvadingUs · 15/01/2017 13:33

Well she is totally right about avoiding trans fats and sugar.
I also imagine that things are wry hard for her if she wants her dcs to avoid all that crap. Very hard to avoid any of that when you are out and about.

Where I don't agree with her is when she is making a big deal out of it and is pushing her ways onto you. It is your decision on whether you are happy to eat those foods or not (and for your dcs to eat them).

At her place, I would gently say NO to your offer of the offending biscuits. And I would take some home stuff when I am out and about or seeing friends. That way, her dcs can have a treat too.
The danger of course is that she is likely to then still be judged and still criticised because she doesn't agree allow her dcs to have biscuits and how it makes you uncomfortable.

Deadsouls · 15/01/2017 13:33

Can't stand faddie foodie nonsense gluten free, dairy free, sugar free everything free....controlly people. The sky will not fall if these items pass anyone's lips occasionally.

(Apart from medical conditions)

MTWTFSS · 15/01/2017 13:34

Your body, your rules!

WorraLiberty · 15/01/2017 13:35

Bluntness Believe me, there are more joyful people to disagree with

I still disagree though.

I think ILostItInTheEarlyNineties has it right.

joystir59 · 15/01/2017 13:36

I choose and cook veggie food/fish for myself but do cook meat sometimes for my OH and MIL (who lives with us), and when I go to someone else's house I gratefully eat whatever they prepare. Anything else is rude (including flagging up that I don't eat meat). I would never criticise someone's else's food choices or show such ingratitude for the treat you had brought. When people share food with us we are blessed.

TheMartiansAreInvadingUs · 15/01/2017 13:37

Btw I fully agree that she is right and most people are totally wrong regarding diet.

If you ctually follow the advice of most nutritionists, we should eat 7~8 portions of vegetables, not trans fats, very little sugar (25g a day according to WHO). That's just basic guidelines.
If you eat like this (and it makes even more sense to do so with your dcs as they are growing + you want to teach them to eat well), you will refuse every single pork pie, biscuits, coke and whatnot.

The thing is, it's not because you are refusing to eat what most people see as a standard diet or an OK diet, that it's allowing other people to insult you. As is done on this thread (see comments about bringing pringles etc.. just to annoy her).
Because being rude and inconsiderate is obviously to right answer to someone who is ... rude and inconsiderate. Yep. So logical.....

Sickofthisnow · 15/01/2017 13:38

Is your friend Gwyneth Paltrow?

PurpleDaisies · 15/01/2017 13:38

when I go to someone else's house I gratefully eat whatever they prepare. Anything else is rude (including flagging up that I don't eat meat)..

Do you really eat meat at other people's houses or have I misunderstood?

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