To think Daddy Dates aren't so terrible??

[MommaGee]

metro.co.uk/2017/01/12/daddy-daughter-dates-are-everything-that-is-wrong-with-the-world-6376907/?ito=social-mail

So there was a viral Fb Post about a Dad taking his daughter out for cake once a month as a "date" and then this article that claims is sexualizing the relationship and doing men and women down and is basically a system of our terrible society.

Aibu to think the author is being overly dramatic and it's just cute?

I don't date my son, just like my DF never dated me. The whole idea is weird. Going to a cafe for coffee and cake is pretty normal and something my DS loves. So we often go somewhere, especially at weekends because I can't be arsed cooking .

My DF collects DS from school one day a week and takes him for cake. It's their special thing. Is that a Granddad Grandson date? If you think that sounds weird you can start to understand how I feel about Daddy daughter/Mummy son dates.

Why can we not just spend time with our kids anymore without attaching some twee significance to it? As a pp said - how little time is this guy spending time with his daughter if he's such a hero for setting aside one afternoon with her to ponce about having cake like it's a massive deal? In my world that's called Saturday afternoon.

And what will this kind of thing teach kids about relationships? That it's OK for their future partners to not be around/hands on/help out as long as they make time to take them on a nice date every now and then? My XP used to think that way. Every now and then he'd take me somewhere amazing and write it off as a business expense which was supposed to demonstrate what a great guy he was, when in reality he was an abusive that.

It's the whole having to put a label and make a "thing" out of everything that really irritates me!
What on earth just happened to going out for the day and having fun?
Why does everything have to be a "play date", "a date night" "daddy date" etc?!
Give up already. It's twee and as annoying as hell.
Don't see anything wrong in a daughter spending a day with her Dad, though, which is essentially what it is. Regardless of what stupid name it's been given.
Those reading creepy into it need to look at themselves to see why their mind automatically goes that way.

Agree - calling it a date is creepy and weird.

Oh dear.

my DS is 5 and I was explaining Valentine's Day - as a day when you do something really lovely with someone you love. So he said he wanted to spend Valentine day with me and i could choose what we do. With it being half term, I have arranged to take him to the theatre. I haven't called it a 'date' but thought it was such a nice thing to do with him.

I take DD shopping, and we go to all the 'girl' shops like Claires accessories etc. She likes going just with me - probably because I spend more than mum does...

I like it that she still calls me Daddy (at 10) - but 'Daddy Dates' YUK YUK YUK

I think that's lovely Mehfruittea

Why oh dear!

Surely spending time with our kids is what we do!

Although Velentines cards to son / daughter / pet cat are weird

Definitely weird.

On an average weekend, my husband spends as much time with the children as I do, they cook together, curl up and watch TV shows together, go into town together, on a little trip, perhaps cinema, and I do the same. This is not dating in any form, nor does it need a special title, it's called parenting.

Any type of "date" sounds like it is controlled or forced.

The first time I heard the term 'daddy date" was from dd2. She was 5 yo at the time. She was referring to an afternoon spent with just her dad, baking.

Dd16 and dd13 both regularly use the term "daddy date". Not so much "mommy date" because I am SAHM and much more available than dad. But occasionally there's been "mommy dates" when we do something special like going to get a massage.

The actual act of a father taking his kids out and doing stuff with them is great but calling it daddy date sounds creepy and wrong. It has a perfectly acceptable name already it's called parenting.

I don't like play date either. I would say "having a friend round" For me date has too many sexual links for me to want to relate it to my children.

Dd2 was just 5 yo at the time. She didn't know if was "wrong" and "creepy" to call baking time with daddy "daddy date".

I think it's twee rather than creepy.

I don't like the way it is built up as a big occasion. As though the child should somehow be grateful for their parent spending time with them. It should be the cake that is the more exciting thing, imo, not the fact that it is with DADDY!
Of course it is nice to have shared time together and to do something fun together, but the terminology of "date" is just a bit off, to me.

Of course some parents work long hours, and it can't always be helped. But when they are free, rather than saying "Hey, DD, I have some free time, let's go on a Daddy Date!" they should be saying "Hey, DD I have some free time, let's go and eat some cake!"

My DC get taken to a cafe one on one by either DH or me fairly often, when the other has an after-school activity and we need to kill time in town before picking them up.
If they had to call it a "something date", my DC would probably say "hot chocolate date" or "Costa date". They absolutely love going, and talk about it, and plan what they are going to order, and which cafe they want to go to, all week.
But they would be at the idea that the main purpose of the trip would be spending time with their dad (or mum).

YABU they are creepy as fuck

I have friends who do this on FB they are the ones who pledge their vaginas to their fathers until they are passed like property to another man on their wedding night. BOAK.

Seeing a picture of a grown man and his "dressed up" daughter going on date night is all kinds of wrong.

I don't like the way it makes it sound like this is all a dad has to do with his DC to be considered a great dad. To me it is putting the emphasis on dads being the fun parents who take kids out for treats and spoil them while mum does all the day to day stuff.

Not the impression we should be giving men IMHO

*jamdonut

Any type of "date" sounds like it is controlled or forced.*

So take it you and DP or ex's never dated? Side point but seems weird to object to the word in its entirety.

I get the twee, over egging the event thing but lots of "dates" aren't about sex so still don't see the creepiness

Next stop = pledging virginity to your dad parties like in the US. Eugh

WTF?! That's just fucking creepy

Hmm, I don't think it's creepily meant although the date word is weird. But I think it's nice to take time out with a child and make a point of spending one-to-one special time with them outside of the daily grind.
I try to have what we've ended up calling a 'DS and Mum afternoon' every now and then. He gets to choose what we do with the only proviso that it's something we can do together - a slice of cake at a coffee shop or mini - golf or something. It's always when we have the best conversations.

Hmm, I don't think it's creepily meant although the date word is weird. But I think it's nice to take time out with a child and make a point of spending one-to-one special time with them outside of the daily grind.
I try to have what we've ended up calling a 'DS and Mum afternoon' every now and then. He gets to choose what we do with the only proviso that it's something we can do together - a slice of cake at a coffee shop or mini - golf or something. It's always when we have the best conversations.

Reminds me I once stayed at my grown up sons for a family funeral and one night we went out to a local Prezzos just him and I. Now though I say it myself I scrub up ok and am often told I look young for my age etc and I had him in my late teens and he has a receeding hairline like his father, so looks older than he is . So the waiter presuming we were a couple came and lit a heart shaped candle between us which we just laughed off then made some fairly subtle but wink wink comment to my son later when I ordered us another bottle of wine (bleugh). I advised him he was my son at this point which still didnt seem to take in. The final straw was when we ordered dessert (one between us) and specifically asked for an extra plate and spoon. He bought out a kind of couples sharing bowl which was obviously designed for you both to lean into the middle presumably looking into each others eyes etc. I lost it at this point as it was getting increasingly cringey for both me and my son. I asked him in a loud voice if he could 'cut out all the romantic stuff as we are mother and son ok as I have already told you ! ! and anyway you shouldn't presume !!' You could hear a pin drop as he mumbled an apology and walked away sheepishly and I shouted after him 'and bring me another bowl please as I've not played aeroplanes with my son for over thirty years' But yes I too hate the whole date thing when it comes to parents and their children , it is wrong on so many levels. Is it yet another Americanism we have adopted.

I don't think calling it a date is wierd, when I arrange to meet friends we may say ok it's a date!

As a date is when you do something together.