To be annoyed with parents allowing their "just walking " toddlers to wander aimlessly

[Ab1000]

When I'm on my lunch break I'm always in a rush to get stuff done. It's so annoying when parents allow their kids to toddle around and get in everyone's way. I have two children so I do know what it's like but mine were either on reins or had a hand firmly held.

staying out of the way is basic courtesy.

keep your knee high trip hazard under supervision, especially where someone might drop hot liquid on its head or it might get flattened by a car or train. Kids can run around freely in parks or gardens. You might find a stuffy coffee shop pleasanter, but tough, that's not what you signed up for.
if you want to chat to your mates, fine - move aside.
if you want to gaze vacantly at your phone, fine - move aside.

OK with anyone using public walkways, at whatever speed.

NOT ok with self indulgent parents holding me hostage to ADMIRE their dancing, grabbing, climbing, screaming toddlers while I am trying to get somewhere or just have a quiet meal in a restaurant.

Never had an issue with it. Sounds like moaning for the sake of it to me! Who gave you more right to be there? Just walk round or wait. For the person who complained about school runs, really !! Set off earlier, people need to take toddlers walking !

YABU. Mothers with toddlers have errands to get done in a day too and we are busy as well. Your time isn't more precious than that toddler and it's mother getting on with their day. How much could said toddler really have slowed you up?? Come on 😉

Feral that is a superb diagram. I hope you have a parking dilemma soon, we love parking diagrams on here :o

I think we all appreciate that toddlers need to learn to walk in public but I do think some are getting a bit arsey. Not everyone hates seeing 'children be children'.

Let's face it, all kids are a fucking pain in the arse at times. My own included. I have dealt with trantrums, strops and god knows what else in public and wished the ground would swallow me up. But I used to take mine out to places first thing on Sunday mornings when I knew it would be really quiet - shopping centre before the shops actually opened or the museum where there was a huge space to run with nothing to break in the main hall. Or the local park so they could run about without loads of other kids.

DD1 was a lazy bugger who would quite happily have stayed in a buggy for years, but was forced out when she was about 3 and made to walk. DD2 started walking at 12 months and by 16 months could easily cover 3 miles and still have energy when we got home. Reins, buggy and any attempts to restrain her were met with utter disbelief and refusal. We ended up compromising on a wrist strap for pavement walking.

I hate seeing toddlers running around on pavements. It scares me that they are going to shoot into the road. I hate seeing them roaming shops and supermarkets freely because it's so easy for accidents to happen or for them to get lost.

We found a lost child in the summer last year. We were on the beach, the air show was on and it was absolutely heaving on the prom and beach. The little boy was foreign and barely spoke English but he was utterly distraught. We stayed with him and managed to work out his name and his mum's name. When mum finally came upon us she was so relieved and so grateful. He was about 6 and it just shows how quickly kids can become lost, not just toddlers. Both mum and son were crying and hugging and we were just stood there feeling a bit awkward at witnessing this lovely moment of reunion!!

It amazes me just how quickly people forget what having a toddler is like. Sure, we can be in charge of them (and we should be supervising them), but that doesn't mean they have the capabilities to act predictably or rationally. We can't always predict how they will react to a situation and sometimes we just have to 'suck up' some of their behaviour just to get things done.

I have a toddler, who has recently been able to walk a reasonable distance. If I'm in a rush, then of course he is in a pushchair. If I am somewhere, such as a coffee shop with hot drinks etc. and people are enjoying a meal, then he is not allowed to run around. If we are in a crowded area, then again he is in a pushchair . I don't however feel the need to insist he is in a pushchair because it might inconvenience someone who is running an errand at their lunch break, with him walking on a pavement or a pedestrian area. Particularly as only by walking will his stamina improve as will his ability to walk 'sensibly'. You've mastered that skill already. Look ahead and if you think you might be held up by them, cross the road or speed up to overtake. Tutting won't help you get things done.

Parents letting their kids sit in the basket area of one of the smaller shopping trolleys . I know a child who fell out and fractured their skull! Sit them in the seat and keep them safe!!

As I said - it's about both sides having a bit of consideration. If your toddler is by your side, then they are as safe as they can be - because you could grab them if necessary, and you aren't taking up all the pavement - unless is is a very narrow pavement, and then you won't be holding people up any more than two adults walking together. But if the pavement is very busy, and lots of people seem to be in a rush, maybe get the toddler to walk in front of you.

And on the other side - if you are the adult hurrying somewhere - accept that there are other people in the world, and they might be walking in front of you. If I am walking in front of you, I will be going slowly, because I am very overweight and have problems as a result with my mobility and joints. I try not to get in people's way, but I have a life to lead too - and the same applies to parents with toddlers, so have a bit of patience and understanding.

If your child needs to run around, maybe, as a PP has said, a coffee shop is not the best place for you to try to spend some time with them - because it is not a safe place for free range toddlers.

YANBU.

They'll be the first to complain if their little one gets scalding coffee spilled on them/ falls down steps/ knocked over and trampled/falls into road/ falls on railway line/ gets lost etc. It isn't everyone else's responsibility to look after their toddler just because they can't be bothered!

God forbid. Shops and public pathways should have restrictions on who is allowed to use them between 12 and 2 or at rush hour. I understand the busy cafe thing and shops where some parents let their toddlers wander off but that doesn't give anyone the right to tell someone they shouldn't be out in public using public facilities and it is unreasonable to expect other people to consider that you are in a rush when you do not consider that maybe just maybe this parent needed to get out the house, maybe they've been stuck indoors ill all week, maybe a lonely parent or parent with pnd wanted to get out to just break up the day, maybe this parent has limited access to their child and has them on saturdays or maybe they have just chosen to go out in the fresh air during the day without worrying about getting in someone's way who may or may not be in a rush on their precious lunchbreak!!!! Yabu

feral love the diagram!!

YANBU, They might be able to walk but they can't yet reason the speed of a car or person or judge what might happen. HOLD THEIR HANDS!!

Nobody is saying that they shouldn't be out - is general comprehension something you struggle with?

Sorry but just keep your toddlers out of my way. I fail to find them as cute as you do. Just as I once upon a time kept my toddlers out of other human beings' way. I'd prefer the child in a buggy out of harm's (and my!) way!

I was scalded quite badly at work because of a free range toddler. He ran into me when I was carrying a tray of hot drinks. Luckily I managed not to fall on him but spilled the drinks on my hands. Gives me the chills to think what would have happened if I'd dropped them on him.

Yeah, you should have them in buggies. No-one on MN will ever criticise you for having a walking-age child in a buggy

I hope the parents had the grace to be embarrassed, Questionable? Probably not...

I think this is a two way street, toddlers should be able to wander within reason but adults should make extra allowances for the fact they are unpredictable. I agree there are some places it's not appropriate for them to be let loose like places where people are likely to be carrying hot food or drink, tube/train stations etc

Everyone has their own agenda and mostly thinks what they are doing is more important than other people around them, it's natural. But if we all made more allowances for those around us (and accept that children don't have that thought process yet) then we'd all be much happier. Regardless of where/who parents should have their toddlers/small children close by for their children's safety but I disagree that they shouldn't be able to wander about a bit.

The comments about the elderly etc are really poor. They have as much right to occupy the space as you do. On balance OP, I think YABU.

I let my toddler toddle around anywhere and everywhere to annoy everyone and everything just so that one day someone who clearly has too much free time may one day rant about it on mumsnet......my work here is done MUHAHAHAHA

(drops mouse gansta style....Oooooooooooooooooooosh) :)

Why is it so difficult for some people to comprehend that parents need to keep,their toddlers under control for their own safety and to prevent them hurting or passing off other people?

And when you're working in a high pressured environment and you have lots of meetings (I would say important but I believe no one on MN is allowed to have those) and you have precisely half an hr to grab lunch and eat it, then you are in a bloody hurry.

I cannot believe how hard it is to understand. Toddlers need supervision. They can explore the world around them but this can be done in a safe way. If this means reins , wrist straps, hands and shock horror avoiding places this is what you do.
My eldest was a bolter. As a toddler either he wore a wrist strap or a bag with the strap attached so I could hold him. No strap meant going into the buggy. Why? Because
It wasn't safe.
We also avoided places because it was not safe for him to run around coffee shops and restaurants. To bolt around he could go to a park and do this which is a normal and safe place.
It's not about never going out. It's about having some bloody common sense and engaging brain to think actually running around in certain places isn't such a good idea. Or ok Tarquin needs to manage stairs
But maybe rush hour isn't the place not because of all these horrid grown ups rushing around but because he might actually get knocked over because it's
So packed.
Maybe running around in a supermarket isn't the place to run around not because of the mean office workers who think they are more important than anyone else but because it's not safe. The produce cages that are taller than the staff. Shopping trollies that are hard steer. Parents with their children in actual buggies. Mobility scooters. People who are visually impaired. Wheelchairs. Just some of the countless hazards in stores that can cause injury
To your child. Think about it.

Although what always amazes me when these threads come up. The toddlers right
To explore and run around doesn't seem to be an issue in a car park. Suddenly these uncontrollable toddlers who refuse
To hold hands, use reins or go in buggies walk with parent holding hand or in the buggy. Odd that.

Today an older woman clanged my 4 year old right in the face with her bags and then scowled at her rather than apologise. My daughter was walking beside me through the street, holding my hand and behaving perfectly yet this over entitled woman thought that she was more important and above apologising to a child 😡 Don't be like that woman OP. You kind of sound like you might be.

Kids can run around freely in parks or gardens. You might find a stuffy coffee shop pleasanter, but tough, that's not what you signed up for.
if you want to chat to your mates, fine - move aside
Exactly.

Also when I was a toddler my Mum did things that revolved around me and my sister not what she wanted to do.

Some parents today have a hard time with toddlers because they take them to places that are boring for them and then complain that they won't behave.

Sitting in a café for two hours is nowhere near as fun as the park.

I dont wonder aimlessly so no one else should! That's such a bad attitude to have.

I spend my life rushing around, 3 kids under 5 and a working mum. So if want to wonder aimlessly when I get chance it's not for anyone to say I can't.

Pixie in the words of another post that's very judgey. I would always apologise if I hurt someone adult or child. Not quite so sure that the parents is of the child who tripped me up would !!