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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that a 1 year old would be ok on a proper bed on her own...

72 replies

MumsyH · 08/01/2017 20:31

DD is 1 this month, shes co-slept since 4 months. Never been an amazing sleeper and never slept through, still wakes several times ranging from needing a boob back to sleep or a rock. The last couple of months she has been going to bed at 7 and then waking by 8 and wide awake ready for a play until normally 11pm. Slightly better the past two nights as just got over a cold shes had for a couple of weeks, however was still up from 12-3.30am last night playing.

Me and DH are going barmy trying to solve her sleep, cant get her to entertain a cot at all. Putting her to bed isnt an issue generally its getting her to stay asleep.
DH has it in his head that she will be better on a floor bed in her room with one of us which we can then slowly leave her on her own and she will sleep better as she will know its her bed and also not want milk etc.. he thinks that if she wakes she would just crawl into our room (opposite, no stairs around)

So AIBU to think that (asuming this works) 1 is far to young to leave on her own in a bed that she can freely crawl out of and get anywhere?!

Or regardles of being U or not, any advice or success stories?!

OP posts:

creamycrackers · 09/01/2017 10:19

Opening post sounds like my DS, he had one of the cots that converted to a toddler bed by the time he was 12 months (really low to the floor) we just put a thin cot mattress next to it in case he rolled out, which he did a few times to begin with then he was fine. We didn't really need to child proof the room as it already was. He slept much better afterwards.

Artandco · 09/01/2017 10:24

Not - why would the floor be cold and uncomfortable? I don't have a draft on floor, it's heated and carpeted, floor is Same temp as sleeping 1/2 metre higher. And they are on a mattress and weigh nothing so very comfortable.
A damp house would need ventilation but a regular house in 2017 a mattress on floor isn't going to get damp. Plus it was lifted once a week to hoover fully underneath. How many people fully hoover under a regular cot weekly? None as too heavy to move. So far dustier

zofranks · 09/01/2017 10:58

we did it, worked fine, put her in an ikea toddler bed actually, bought the kids zipsheets (expensive but worth it), put a stairgate on her room, never had an issue, kept the monitor for a while but stopped that after about a year tbh. She always slept way better in a bed then a cot so go for it

PurpleTraitor · 09/01/2017 11:07

No one would bat an eyelid at a two (or nearly two year old) in a bed and I'm not sure what the difference is in terms of dangers and things they can get into/out of? Both mine were in beds by their second birthdays so we're in beds aged 1? I know there is a difference bwteeen just one and nearly two but what mischief can a 13 month old get into that a 23 month old would not?

Cwtchythings · 09/01/2017 11:16

Both of mine were in proper beds around 1. No problems at all. If they woke they invariably came straight to me, only now that they are almost 10 and have iPads do they not come to my bed in the morning! Stairgate at the top of the stairs, cupboards screwed to walls and all was fine.

Notso · 09/01/2017 11:23

Art When we moved in to our current house we all slept on mattresses on the floor in one room for a couple of months while we were decorating and having building work done.
It was really draughty and cold at night despite the central heating, I am never normally cold in bed. We were on wooden floor and there was condensation from body heat on the cold floor every morning, even under my then 2 year olds mattress.
I hoover/hoovered under all cots weekly and beds weekly, in fact with DC3 and 4's room I vacuum and damp dust daily moving all the furniture except wardrobes and a shelf unit which are attached to the wall as my 6 year old is asthmatic and dust is a trigger.

EineKleine · 09/01/2017 11:28

That's completely true PurpleTraitor.

But OP mentions the baby able to "get anywhere" and crawl into the parents' room. Gating the room or keeping a door closed so she doesn't have unsupervised run of the house is sensible, whether the child is 1 or 2.

Artandco · 09/01/2017 11:40

Many are toilet training before 2 also so can't go in a cot as need access to the toilet

Rixera · 09/01/2017 11:46

Mine couldn't as she is a rowdy sleeper (regularly wakes up crying as she's got herself wedged sideways with her head bumping the cot corner and headboard... Occasionally sleep-crawls and bumps her head on the head board...) So I can fully see her sleep rolling off the bed, crawling into the wall and all sorts. She had to go in her own room at 2 months as she kept crashing into the sides of the Moses basket and nearly toppled herself out of my bed when cosleeping!

But we have baby proofed her room, have a potty in there, so she plays there happily while I get dressed. The being alone is not the issue imho, especially with a monitor.

Bohemond · 09/01/2017 11:48

Our just two year old is still in his large cot bed with the sides up. He has been in it since birth (with a sleepyhead) and in his own room from 6 months. His sleeping bag stops him climbing out as he can't get his leg high enough (and to be honest he is too busy sleeping ). When we do take the side off we have a gro bed which will zip him into a duvet arrangement. The idea of co-sleeping fills me with horror.

Notso · 09/01/2017 12:16

Don't really understand potty training comment, I can't imagine many one year olds toddling off on their own in the dark to the toilet. Mine hardly ever needed a wee during the night once dry, if they did they just shouted for us to take them for a wee. Even when in a bed they did this until about 4 minimum. My youngest despite being dry in the day for years is still in night nappies which is pretty common.

Artandco · 09/01/2017 12:26

Not - depends on child then. Ours were toilet trained by 18 months. At that point one was dry at night also, the other not when asleep but as soon as they woke they would want to wee in toilet not nappy. They had a step and seat on toilet and would head there themselves whilst shouting to us so by the time we were up and there they were half on toilet or already going. Had they been in cot, they would have probably wet themselves first by the time we got them out.

A cot is really just so they don't fall out surely, sonif on floor no harm. Caged in until 3-4 is madness. They cause more harm falling from climbing out from a height

Playpen suggesting make me chuckle also. They would work maybe for a early crawling baby at 4-7 months, but most houdinis like mine would have scaled that and out before you left room

Original poster

MumsyH · 09/01/2017 12:30

Shes certainly not potty trained so wont be an issue. Were going to use the bottom bunk of the kura so literally floor level. Either that or something like this so she essentially has bed guards aswell.

Small double would be good but her bedroom is tiny so only just space for a single bit eradicates the issue of toddler bed co sleeping struggles that have been mentioned!

To think that a 1 year old would be ok on a proper bed on her own...

OP posts:

Notso · 09/01/2017 12:48

Yes Art obviously it varies by child and I think house set up has a lot to do with it too. In our first house the bathroom was downstairs right at the back of the house no way would an 18 month old be able to or would I want them to try and negotiate steep stairs in the dark alone.
I don't think keeping them in a cot is madness, DC4 always loved his cot and didn't want to sleep anywhere else, he was the only one to sleep in a cot at night from birth. He was a great sleeper after three pretty bad ones and it was case of if it ain't broke don't fix it. He started climbing out just after he turned 3 and I was concerned his sleep would be disrupted.

JellyWitch · 09/01/2017 12:51

My son had a mattress on the floor from 8 months. Never entertained a cot either.

seventhgonickname · 09/01/2017 13:12

Mine was in a cot until 18 months.In our room 1st year then own room.Started putting her on trundle bed for naps during the day then at night by 18 months.She had a sleeping bag in the cot so she couldn't climb out.Our only problem was that we couldn't move the cot out for ages as she screamed if it wasn't there even though she didn't use it.We had to dismantle it piece by piece until she let us take it all away!

AlwaysNeverOnTime · 09/01/2017 13:19

Both of mine co slept until they were about 18 months then I put them into a single bed with a bed guard. I used to get into bed with them until they were asleep then creep out. They were both horrific sleepers (I didn't do any sleep training) but putting them into single beds really helped. Neither of mine would ever go into a cot.

BabychamSocialist · 09/01/2017 14:39

I'd look at getting a bed with low-sides or something but yeah, she'll sleep better out of a cot.

MLGs · 09/01/2017 14:41

dd was in a bed with a bed guard at 18 months

ifoundthebread · 09/01/2017 20:41

My dd has been in a cot bed since 1 with a bed rail on. She knows how to climb out but has never bothered. I put her to bed at 7.3/8 awake and so far so good. She doesn't even get up on a morning. I think because it's blacked out in her room she can't see where she's going even if she wants to.

BigGrannyPants · 09/01/2017 22:51

Op my sister used the Kura for her toddler and it works really well. Our twins climbed out the cot at 14 months, were in a toddler bed briefly but hated it and now share a room with their older brother in triple bunk beds (their bunks are ground level) I have wardrobes, bookcases and toy boxes and everything has been fine. Furniture is bolted on to the wall.

BigGrannyPants · 08/04/2017 19:46

Our twins were in a bed at 10 months after one of them managed to somehow climb out the cot in the middle of the night. It became more dangerous to have them in the cot. They went in to a toddler bed until they were just over a year and then we moved them in to triple bunk beds (2 low level beds and one on top for my older DC) they have been absolutely fine

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