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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask advice as my parents have been waiting for three hours for an ambulance

247 replies

haveyourselfamerry · 07/01/2017 19:35

They are 500 miles away in Bournemouth. Dad is 80 and frail with poor visual processing and probable autism.
A little over three hours ago dad fell in the sitting room. Mum got him into a propped up position. It hurts behind his left hip.
The history is that he fell last February and broke his hip. He was stuck in hospital waiting for a fictitious rehab place for 10 weeks, as a result of which his gait has permanently altered.
They are hoping this is not another break as it feels less bad than last time.
Obviously though they are getting increasingly uncomfortable and distressed.
He will fall asleep soon. Mum is wondering if she can get him lying down. She is too fail to stop him dropping off/sliding over.
Thanks in advance :(
Old age s not for sissies.

OP posts:
TheTrollinator · 07/01/2017 20:09

Do they have a neighbour who could help out. Even if they are not on close terms with their neighbours it's the type of situation where most people would be very happy to help?

crashdoll · 07/01/2017 20:09

I wonder if the Red Cross are in the area and can visit him to assess. It's a beyond shit situation though and even harder when you're so far away.

BoreOfWhabylon · 07/01/2017 20:10

Ignore me FrankiesKnuckle is right.

FruitCider · 07/01/2017 20:12

Unfortunately, whilst your dad has had an accident and is in pain, his condition is not life threatening. He will be low priority, whilst paramedics are out dealing with cardiac arrests, serious road traffic accidents, etc.

Not that I don't understand your frustration, my dad waited 6 hours for an ambulance to take him to a hospice. He died 10 hours later. I was extremely frustrated at the time, but would rather that an ambulance attends a cardiac arrest or someone bleeding to death, above and beyond anything else.

Flowers
Original poster
haveyourselfamerry · 07/01/2017 20:15

Their GP has no out of hours number.....crikey things really are falling apart.

I have left a message with the neighbour for when she gets home.

OP posts:
FourToTheFloor · 07/01/2017 20:17

Frankies it's the government PAST AND PRESENT who have allowed the NHS to fail.

I'm fed up with seeing one party blamed, they're all at it. And no I don't vote True before you start sprouting further bullshit.

OhTheRoses · 07/01/2017 20:17

Have you actually dialled 999?

CotswoldStrife · 07/01/2017 20:18

I feel your frustration - a family member waited around 5 hours for an ambulance recently, and was then stuck in a queue at the hospital (with the ambulance drivers) along with a lot of other patients. The drivers can't leave without handing the patient over, they were probably stuck at the hospital before collecting him!

Can you ring the ambulance control room? Or ring their GP's surgery and the answerphone should give you the OOH number.

It is so frustrating. I am thinking of you.

Original poster
haveyourselfamerry · 07/01/2017 20:18

No I have dialled their GP and discovered there is no out of hours.

OP posts:
Cheby · 07/01/2017 20:19

If there is absolutely no one else (neighbours etc) to help, id hop in the car right now and get down there. Call 999 again from your hands free and explain that he is drowsy and unable to stay upright, hopefully they will move him up the list.

Do you have siblings or other relatives who may be a distance but still nearer than you? I would drive out in these circumstances for a great aunt or uncle if I was asked.

Lovemusic33 · 07/01/2017 20:21

Is there anyone there to help your mum?
If I wasn't at home alone with the dc's I would go but I'm about a hour away. There are quite a few mn's in Bournemouth so someone maybe able to at least go and sit with them until a ambulance gets there.

Miserylovescompany2 · 07/01/2017 20:21

You phone the GP, there should be an out of hours number recorded on the answer system.

Or you phone 101 and explain the situation.

Good luck.

MirabelleTree · 07/01/2017 20:22

Blimey, I guess people are supposed to ring 111 then. I've just found that there in a Community Nursing Team on call for emergencies, accessed by ringing 111 , which is obviously difficult from where you are. But maybe it is like the ambulance where you can ask fir a message to be passed on?

But at this point I'm wondering if you ring SS 01202 657279 and ask if they can help access ideally a GP or a nurse to go round whilst they wait ? It will also create a bit of a paper trail for any future care assessment.

Original poster
haveyourselfamerry · 07/01/2017 20:22

Thanks, no it just says. Ring 111 or 999.

OP posts:
lougle · 07/01/2017 20:22

Hello! Flowers I'm glad you corrected Langley because I was really embarrassed that I couldn't place you Grin.

That's fine - I just didn't want to suggest getting up if it could have been a heart attack or a stroke that caused the fall, basically.

If they think he is just bruised and he can get on to all fours, then using a chair seat to support his arms and sitting back on to a stool is a good way to get up. Then from there, turning the chair around so the tall section is facing him, using that to act as a frame, he could move from stool to another chair placed behind him.

BoreOfWhabylon · 07/01/2017 20:22

OP, ring 999 yourself as Frankies suggested upthread. Your ambulance service can contact the ambulance service in your parents area.

m0therofdragons · 07/01/2017 20:23

I work in a south west hospital and last weekend we had heart attack and stroke patients waiting 4 hours or more for ambulances. It's really difficult at the moment. Op I hope your df gets help very soon.

MycatsaPirate · 07/01/2017 20:23

have Sad thing is that to be a paramedic now you need a bloody degree. My DD is off to uni next month to start a three year course where she is not allowed to work alongside her studies and placements as she simply won't have the time. So she's going to be left with about £30 a week to live on after paying accommodation out of her loan and still has to be able to run her car to get to placement which can be 35 miles from the university. Nearly £60k of debt after three years and the pay isn't even that great unless she does another two years studying trauma.

Thank god there are people out there who really do want to do this otherwise we'd be left with no one in a few years. NHS used to fund this but no longer.

lovelearning · 07/01/2017 20:26

heart attack and stroke patients waiting 4 hours or more for ambulances

Shock
SpartacusWoman · 07/01/2017 20:27

I hope an ambulance arrives soon OP. You must be so worried,

I had similar with my Mum, several hours waiting for ambulance after a fall, during which she deteriorated too, repeat calls to 999 didn't help and I thought she was going to die at one point, then she had another several hours in a queue to be admitted at A and E, during which the paramedics have to stay with the patient meaning the ambulance she went in is off the road for another three hours was about ten/eleven hours before she got seen.

My mum said lots of people were being abusive to staff and demanding they jump the queue, but that the delays were not the nurses fault and she felt bad for them having to put up with it.

I'd read stuff in papers but thought they'd exaggerated, we were in a small town, dread to think what it's like in a city. I genuinely don't think we will have an NHS in the future.

Cheby · 07/01/2017 20:27

There is no direct access OOH service in my area OP but we just call 111, they triage and assess if you need a GP and then the GP calls you back. I needed to see them today and they made me an appointment within 2 hours of the call. They would also arrange house calls if necessary.

Original poster
haveyourselfamerry · 07/01/2017 20:27

Ambulance has arrived!
Neighbour has come home.
Last year's experience tells me this is just the beginning :(
Next post may be about the wait in A&E....will he be on a stretcher, I guess he will.

Thank you for all help so far.

OP posts:
FruitCider · 07/01/2017 20:29

Nearly £60k of debt after three years and the pay isn't even that great unless she does another two years studying trauma.

You'll be pleased to know all paramedics are being uplifted to band 6, so starting take home pay will be around £32k. Still piss poor pay for the job it entails, but better than it was!

RhiWrites · 07/01/2017 20:29

Please don't think I am uncaring. I waited with my aunt for ten hours once for a non emergency visit while she was frightened and in pain - and the story didn't end there.

But I'm rather alarmed about the people suggesting that OP lies to emergency services with stories of chest pain or drowsiness, or that she calls 999.

It sounds to me as though the prorities are for both parents to stay warm, stay calm and make OPs dad as comfortable as possible while they wait. OP, I do hope someone us able to come for your parents soon.

CotswoldStrife · 07/01/2017 20:29

Glad that the ambulance has finally arrived. I suspect they will both be waiting quite a while in hospital too unfortunately, but at least they will have medical care on standby.

It is awful. I don't know what the answer is.