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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that this is really weird behaviour?

29 replies

HadEnoughThisChristmas · 05/01/2017 14:40

I am friends on Facebook with the mum of one of my DS's friends. She's a really nice woman, seems perfectly normal, down to earth, and easy to get along with.

She is married and her husband is forever putting photos on Facebook of her, tagging her and saying things like "Don't you think my wife is fit as fuck?" to all his FB friends. He also does a lot of statuses about his "gorgeous wife" and says things like all men are jealous because he's married to the most sexy woman in the world.

I know we all love and fancy our spouses, and this woman is very attractive, but does anyone else think it's quite strange that a 40 something man is always doing this? It's as if he needs people to approve of his choice of wife or something.

OP posts:
BIgBagofJelly · 05/01/2017 14:43

It is cringy but I do know a few people who do this. Sometimes it's just their way of publicly complimenting their spouse and sometimes it's showing off by proxy (which is worse).

Waffles80 · 05/01/2017 14:44

Are they swingers, hoping to lure others in?

It's very weird.

I'm extremely gorgeous* but I'd never let my OH make a big deal of it.

*not really

ph0ebe · 05/01/2017 14:48

I think it's people who are really insecure in their rely who feel the need to do this Confused

ph0ebe · 05/01/2017 14:49

rely?? Relationships

MrsHathaway · 05/01/2017 14:51

That's so insecure!

If you like your wife, that's all that matters.

dollydaydream114 · 05/01/2017 14:52

I suppose it's his way of complimenting her.

To me, it seems like a cringy and slightly crude way of doing it, though. Saying 'My wife is gorgeous' or 'I'm so lucky to have such a stunning wife!' is one thing - I do see other people do this on Facebook, wives as well as husbands, and although I sometimes think 'All right, get a room' it's pretty harmless. But saying 'other men are jealous of me because my wife's so fit' is just obnoxious and disrespectful to his male friends and their wives. It's basically saying 'Your wife isn't as attractive as mine, and you wish you didn't have to settle for the wife you've got'. Really quite horrible when you think about it.

I've noticed there's a bit of trend on social media among younger people to post pics with a caption like 'My boyfriend is better than yours' in way that's kind of pretending to be joky/ironic. Obviously the 'yours' doesn't refer to anyone specific, but I still find it really unpleasant. I know it's just a figure of speech but really? Does it have to be a competition?!

Tatlerer · 05/01/2017 15:00

Eurgh! That's grim and I'd be horrified if my DH posted things like that on Facebook!

ParadiseCity · 05/01/2017 15:02

Yuk- sounds like he sees her as a piece of meat. I feel sorry for her.

Ohyesiam · 05/01/2017 16:18

Yuk, very cringy. Especially the jealous bit. Its like a cattle market, my prize heffer's gonna win the show.

problembottom · 05/01/2017 17:02

There's a mid-40s couple in our local who are an extreme version of this - she dresses a bit like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. They openly say she's dressing for him. He loves Facebook posts saying how hot she is complete with a sexy snap (eg sitting on her bum in a bra and g-string looking back into the camera). He's fallen out with a few mates who have commented it might be a bit much information!

GeillisTheWitch · 05/01/2017 17:05

I'm amazed they even have separate Facebook accounts to start with. The people I know who are this insecure have joint ones.

53rdAndBird · 05/01/2017 17:08

I bet they're swingers.

MrsHerculePoirot · 05/01/2017 17:09

Weird - you know you can block his posts though so you don't have to see them?

handslikecowstits · 05/01/2017 17:09

Is he trying to convince others or himself?

Is he trying to warn others off?

user1478860582 · 05/01/2017 17:12

Do they have pampas grass and a hot tub?

Witchend · 05/01/2017 17:17

There's a couple I know who talk like that-don't know if they're like that on fb as I'm not friends.
I find it rather odd as neither are above average looks, so it comes across as though they're deluded, but maybe it's actually lack of self-confidence.
They tend to talk about other people being jealous of them and how their is bigger/better, and are very entitled, so I tend to assume it's the former and avoid.

StewieGMum · 05/01/2017 17:19

I'd assume he was cheating on her.

Frouby · 05/01/2017 17:19

I know a couple like this. Except she is average and mumsy. Like myself.

Until he posts photos of her in thigh high boots, a feather boa and a smile.

I suspect they are swingers.

dollydaydream114 · 05/01/2017 17:20

There's a mid-40s couple in our local who are an extreme version of this - she dresses a bit like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. They openly say she's dressing for him. He loves Facebook posts saying how hot she is complete with a sexy snap (eg sitting on her bum in a bra and g-string looking back into the camera). He's fallen out with a few mates who have commented it might be a bit much information!

In the very early days of Facebook an old university acquaintance friended me. A week later I logged on and his status update was "Woken up by a blowjob, I love Sundays!" A couple of people said 'Er, TMI mate' and I assumed he'd realise that nobody wanted to read this stuff, then a couple of weeks later he posted "Can't wait for my birthday although it won't be a proper birthday unless [Wife] lets me cum on her face."

SO GRIM. I unfriended him after that. The worst thing was that I actually knew the wife as she'd been at uni with us too. She wasn't on Facebook so probably had no idea he was posting that sort of thing.

user1478860582 · 05/01/2017 17:24

Why do many assume they are swingers? Most swingers keep that to themselves.

He just sounds immature.

handslikecowstits · 05/01/2017 17:25

Fucking hell Dolly! Shock

NancyJoan · 05/01/2017 17:28

I might start doing this to DH. He would probably die from the awfulness.

Soubriquet · 05/01/2017 17:31

To me,'it sounds like he's the "alpha male" amongst his friends and he wants to remind them that he has the hot girl and that everyone secretly envys his life

A lot of insecurity

BumDNC · 05/01/2017 17:32

I know people who do this. They always gushing About how they have the sexiest partner etc etc. I ignore it as it's attention seeking

NicknameUsed · 05/01/2017 17:36

Is he trying to convince others or himself?

That's what I was thinking. He "doth protest too much, methinks"

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