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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Am I an uncharitable bitch ?

164 replies

snugglecat · 01/01/2017 23:14

I live in a small block of flats. The guy opposite us is a bit of a character 30-40 pretends to be homeless in the local town but obviously has a two bed flat to himself. The police are often knocking on the door and the corridor often has the smell of cannabis but he doesn't cause me trouble. We politely exchange a hello on the stairs but that's about it.

I've noticed recently he's had the flat door propped open on occasion but there is no lights on - I suspect he's run out of electric (but has money for weed)

Today I came home and he's ran an extention cord from one of the sockets in the hall through the letterbox into the flat.

Our communal areas are well looked after and regularly cleaned, but we do pay the service charges for this . Which includes the lightening and maintenance in the cost.

Effectively he's stealing electricity and we are all paying for it (16 I'm the block) .

I have been a single mother living on the breadline making ends meet so I've known hardship. I'm since married with two children . We do OK but we watch the pennies.

I feel annoyed by him doing this but in the same way I'm annoyed with myself for wanting to report him - do I really want someone sitting in the dark with no electric , even if it is self inflicted ?!

So wwyd? Aibu to report him to the housing association ? Or should I be more charitable and turn a blind eye ?

Interested in your views !

OP posts:

myusernamewastaken · 02/01/2017 12:24

He may well have an electric fan heater plugged in his flat...that will push the electric usage right up.

WorraLiberty · 02/01/2017 12:27

Yes that's true Unborn but even just 2 seconds of thinking might've made all the difference here.

The OP doesn't know when he bought the weed or even that he bought it at all. He could quite easily have got a few joints off his mate to see him through til payday, or got a bag on tick from the dealer.

But considering a PP said he should be reported because he can afford an extension lead, I despair

itsmine · 02/01/2017 12:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lyricaldancer · 02/01/2017 12:43

I didn't see the latest update. So you were able to peer in and see what he was using it for... He doesn't have a working fridge, freezer etc then. He must be quite cold at times, not having any heat at all.

Why is the fact he has a second bedroom mentioned at all? It doesn't have any relevance as far as I can work out.

Cocklodger · 02/01/2017 12:56

I'm with worra on this (swiss cheese anyone?) but I'll bite.
Also, in my limited professional experience,
beggars don't stop begging when they move into homes.
what do you give them money for?
a cup of coffee? a sandwich?
Not a home. So in effect, he isn't scamming anyone by having a home, perhaps he is by taking drugs, but most street sleepers or beggars are unfortunately. Its a hard life. One I've lived for 4 months and a life I'll put every effort into avoiding.
If he's spent most of his life on the streets, he's probably picked up an addiction. perhaps he replaced a stronger drug with weed, or uses weed as an emotional crutch. Whatever you think of weed there are worse things to be addicted to, not that its right of course,but I'd rather live next door to a stoner than a crack addict. the DWP is pretty sanction happy. If he's not actually looking for work, there are so many barriers to work if you're addicted to a drug, have been a rough sleeper previously for an extended amount of time as I'm assuming, Coupled with low self esteem, possible depression and of course, the low functioning that comes with heavy drug use. SAHMs who've been out of the workforce for 5 years find entering into the workforce again difficult, Let alone someone who's never been in it and rough slept for most of their lives.
There is limited support for getting our homeless off the streets. when they're off the streets there is basically none.
Just to dispel some of the shit from other posters.
OP, if you're not talking shit, I'd be inclined to pop over and have a chat.

Boogers · 02/01/2017 14:38

Cocklodger and Worra have it. Didn't spot the holes until I read the thread again today.

OP, if you think he's growing cannabis, call 101. If you think he's struggling to power his flat then a bit more than a cursory 'y'all right love' on the stairs wouldn't go amiss. If you think he's just taking the piss then call the housing association/landlord/concierge.

MysticTwat · 02/01/2017 15:29

Why is the fact he has a second bedroom mentioned at all? It doesn't have any relevance as far as I can work out

It's relevant as in, he maybe begging in town because his benefits don't cover the cost of living there. Leaving him short and not able to pay bills, buy food etc..

Op said it often smells weed, not that she can smell it all time, or now. Agree with worra it could be given from a mate. Or when he's had enough to pay bills he's bought some.

Boogers · 02/01/2017 15:50

Sorry, what now?

Boogers · 02/01/2017 15:54

snugglecat may I ask how old you are?

lyricaldancer · 02/01/2017 16:31

It's relevant as in, he maybe begging in town because his benefits don't cover the cost of living there. Leaving him short and not able to pay bills, buy food etc..

You misunderstand me I think. I meant it was part of the judgemental tone and scene setting of the undeserving, self inflicted poor. "pretends to be homeless in the local town but obviously has a two bed flat to himself." The OP later says he might not have been affected by the bedroom tax as the second room is too small.

UnbornMortificadoAtChristmas · 02/01/2017 16:47

I'm sure it's been said on here that statistically most beggars aren't actually homeless.

I used to be more judgemental but I've a friend (I've mentioned previously) who's an alcoholic. She's out begging currently and I'm fucking worried sick.

We met when we were inpatients together in a psychiatric hospital the only difference when we left was that I had a supportive family and she didn't.

Begging does not fund some luxury lifestyle but does fund her habit.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 02/01/2017 16:56

He's not going to be running much off an extension lead, certainly not powering his whole flat. A lamp or two won't use much electricity, you wouldn't even notice it split 16 ways. An electric heater would be more though

You can purchase extension leads which have a section where you can plug other items in. Google 4 socket extension lead.

If the has one of those he can plug 3 items into it plus plugging another 4 socket extension lead. You can buy these for around £5. It is possible he could have a dozen or more things plugged in.

This is very dangerous.

JessaHanna · 02/01/2017 17:06

Absolutely report him for the electricity.

Same thing happened where I live and all residents were passed on the higher electricity charge through the increased service charge.

I hope your HA are better at managing the situation than ours are though.

harshbuttrue1980 · 02/01/2017 17:07

A second bedroom is relevant because, firstly, many ordinary working people without lots of extra cash give to beggars on the street assuming they are in real hardship. I do when I can afford to, but wouldn't give to someone if I knew they were better off housing-wise than me.

Also, a second bedroom is an extra potential source of income. Why isn't he trying to rent it out?
If he has a spare room and can afford to take drugs, I wouldn't call him "poor". I used to volunteer in a soup kitchen, and some people were actually sleeping in carparks. I have a lot of sympathy for them, less so for someone who is relatively well off but chooses to spend his money on weed.

Megatherium · 02/01/2017 17:12

The OP has said that her building is owned by a housing association, so unless they employ a person (which they might do- I don't know) to specifically monitor electricity theft over how many 100s/1000s of properties in their stock, then there isn't actually a chance that they'll notice a difference

Ever heard of IT? It's standard practice to have a programme which can highlight unusual bills.

Dawndonnaagain · 02/01/2017 17:17

I have a lot of sympathy for them, less so for someone who is relatively well off but chooses to spend his money on weed.
Without knowing the circumstances that got them to that point?
Oh, and how do you know he's relatively well off? How do you know he hasn't been sanctioned? Obviously there is some sort of problem if he's having to steal electricity.

UnbornMortificadoAtChristmas · 02/01/2017 17:21

I don't think addicts "choose" to spent their money on drugs.

Imagine being that reliant on something that you choose it over having electricity?

MysticTwat · 02/01/2017 17:33

a second bedroom is an extra potential source of income. Why isn't he trying to rent it out?

FFS are people really this stupid? You are not allowed to sublet if you are renting. He will be getting penalised financially for having a second bedroom.

Why dosen't he move to a one bedroomed? I hear you say. Because there are probably no, one bedroomed flats available. Local authorities can't magic them out the air you know.

WorraLiberty · 02/01/2017 17:55

Also, a second bedroom is an extra potential source of income. Why isn't he trying to rent it out?

Because the OP would report him

Because if the OP is right in thinking it's too small to count as a bedroom (despite her managing to cram 2 primary kids into hers), it'll be the same size as a large cupboard.

UnbornMortificadoAtChristmas · 02/01/2017 18:31

This thread is sad.

The fact that we still think of some people as the undeserving poor is depressing.

IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 02/01/2017 23:45

I've read thread since my first post and I'm still of same opinion, that makes me heartless, uncharitable, self-righteous, yet has vast experience & knowlege about addiction. Report.

I feel Same if it was a female, dog or Alien.

I have an extention lead, anyone near me? My electric has just gone up and I'm running low on vodka

I'm sure I had it stated in agreement about use of plug sockets in Communial hall.

Btw the block of small flats not far from me isn't ready after a yr since that went up in flames bcos some pillock overloaded extension cable.

WorraLiberty · 02/01/2017 23:48

Where did the OP mention this guy is an addict?

She has no idea.

She only says hello to him on the stairs...

IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 02/01/2017 23:54

The word Addict has been thrown around in this thread

WorraLiberty · 02/01/2017 23:57

Probably better to stick to the Swiss cheese that is the OP's story/stories for now.

UnbornMortificado · 02/01/2017 23:58

I thought the op had said addict but I've just reread and she hasn't

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