Been offered a job, WIBU to turn it down and continue claiming benefits?

[Stevenson100]

Really struggling here. I am a single mum to 3 gorgeous boys - I've been in remission for a while now and could easily work. I do need the money and I want to prove to my boys that even if you get knocked down (cancer) you get back up again and build something for yourself. I have qualifications and used to be a chef for a really great hotel company.

I was offered a job role just before Christmas and I need to let them know by the new year, I'll have to cook live lobsters. I am so not keen on this. I don't have an issue cooking with meats, etc. but to be a part of the killing process? There is no way I'd be comfortable with that and I think that would cause a massive problem. WIBU to turn this job down because of that? I'd obviously be looking for other work and finding whatever comes up and going for it.

I thought pretty much all shellfish was cooked alive, I'd assume you'd know that as a chef so i find it a little odd that you'd have applied for this job if it's an issue for you

Why apply to a seafood restaurant?

I guess people aren't always in the luxurious position of being able to pick and choose. Especially when benefits are involved. I can imagine that the OP is confronted with a situation of having to consider every option even if there are unpalatable parts of the role.

DH and I were saying only the other day that so many chain restaurants hardly do much food prep these days. The Brakes Bros lorry turns up with batches of preprepared food and the hiring process is around whether the person can operate a microwave and has the required skills to do the display aspects of food prep not cooked no dishes from scratch. That's why we eat at home so much!

not cooked no dishes from scratch that should say!

The reason that people on benefits can't pick and choose which roles to apply for is because a minoriry of people were too choosy and used to spend years on benefits waiting for the perfect job to come along. I think it is right that those on unemployment benefits should have to apply for any suitable role and accept it if offered. Of course they can make sure that they are not offered the role by mentioning at interview stage of there are aspects of the job that they can't manage for whatever reason. The OP has how we been offered the job and if the Job centre are aware of her application she could be sanctioned and lose her benefits for turning the job down. A chef should really be aware that certain seafood will be need to be dealt with whilst still alive and she should have mentioned that she couldn't deal with live food at interview stage.

It's a tough one!

Good on you for having a good work ethic especially after cancer. With three kids. You need a medal for this alone!!

Wait until something that suits you better comes along. Enjoy your time with the kids in the mean time xxx

You put it in the freezer to knock it out, then sever its central nervous system with a knife. It should die instantly. I'm not a chef, but that's how Alton Brown does it.

What Steff says.

I've read of this method before, though I don't know who Alton Brown is. ()

I can see your point

BUT

If benefits weren't available, you'd take any job to feed your children. I'm not having a go, just pointing this out.
Years ago I was offered a job in a pub - I was a chef once - but the hours were not very good as I had 4 DC to look after after their dad scarpered. I was lucky, the owner realised I was a single parent and don't 'report' me to the job centre for turning the job down.

Good luck and well done for keeping your work ethic.

I was going to say YABU but if the job involves something you would find very difficult then I would turn it down, or find out if they have a different method as someone else mentioned.
I'm a farmers wife so I'm not immune to slaughtering methods but I would draw the line at lobsters too.

Agree the OP should reject the job. Responses too harsh too.

I think this is difficult as I would feel the same and struggle seeing live lobsters in tanks in restaurants waiting to be killed, but that's more about them having shit lives that are ended by being boiled to death. For that reason I'm very funny about where meat I buy is produced and should probably give up meat altogether but feel I want to support ethical farming. Anyway, my moral conundrum aside, if you call the restaurant and say you wouldn't be prepared to do this aspect of the job but otherwise are keen to accept and they in turn say no, have you actually refused the job?

I heard the RSPCA on the radio saying freezing lobsters was excessive cruelty and there was a machine to kill them now.

I couldn't do it either.

Congrats on being in remission for some time now Have you returned to your previous energy levels and wellness? If you find you need to go to bed early, and become tired after playing with kids earlier than you used to, then could part time work a few days a week be an option?

Don't take the job.
If you're uncomfortable with it now, imagine how much it will affect you when you are regularly cooking lobster (which you will in a seafood restaurant).
I came on to say YABU but actually I think you are not.
Don't take the job. wait for another. You can't take it and say you won't do the lobster because I imagine it's an integral part of the job.

I couldn't boil lobsters or kill them some other way either

Yanbu - I could not do this job either.

This job could lead to an amazing job in a better restaurant with better pay! Just learn how to kill lobster humanely and take the job

I couldn't do it so YANBU there must be a way round it though

I don't think yabu turning the job down, there will be other jobs out there that don't require you to kill your tools before you use them. Tell your boys why you have turned down the job and be proud you have some morals. Well done in your remission btw.

I can understand why you wouldn't be experienced in shellfish prep if you've not had professional training - it's considered a high risk food and the kitchen HACCP documentation is required to include details of the skill of the chef preparing it. (I'm assuming you're in the U.K.)

Why not ring the employer and ask what training you'll be given? It's an exciting opportunity - I trained to cook/prepare shellfish and I've had lots of opportunities to work in pop up restaurants and even as a film extra as a result.

If you have ethical issues about shellfish then you may need to consider another line of work - it's not reasonable to seek employment as chef and then refuse the work on ethical grounds.

of course lobsters have a cns!!!

don't take this job op - there will be others

I personally feel if you aren't prepared to kill something yourself you shouldn't eat it. A lot of seafood is cooked from live, are mussels less worthy of fretting over killing than lobsters?
But if you don't feel comfortable just don't take the job.

They have a very simple nervous system and do not process pain in the same way. However it is very very unlikely that a chef would be putting a live lobster in a pot. This is not the way to prepare lobster, they can be killed very quickly and more humanely than many other animals used for eating.

I agree with you chit, slaughterhouses are much worse than how lobsters are killed before eating. But people just don't want to think about it. I am surprised by a chef being squeamish though. Except vegan chefs of course.

The Brakes Bros lorry turns up with batches of preprepared food and the hiring process is around whether the person can operate a microwave

Breaks don't just delivered prepared food, actually the prepared food section is pretty small and expensive. Breaks is one of the suppliers to my work, it's storeroom and any frozen ingredients we order from them, we use a butchers and a greengrocer as well. Everything is made from scratch, so don't always assume that it's all microwave food if you see the breaks lorry.