To leave now and drive 4 hours to get to my child?

[SocksRock]

She's 9 and staying with my Mum for a couple of days. We were all up there until Monday morning when DH and I and the other two children came home. The plan was she was going to drop DD about an hour south of where she lives with a friend of mine who is coming near us and would drop DD back home. When we arrived at Mums on Friday she had a cough. Was generally OK but I did say should I take DD back with us. DM insisted she was fine and wanted to have DD so I left her there. I've just had a text saying she's much worse and isn't able to leave the house. On the phone she sounds awful like she can hardly breathe. I want to leave now and drive to get DD and some medical help for DM, DH wants me to wait and leave around 5am so I've had some sleep and the roads will still be clear. I do have two sisters locally (usually) but one is in Dubai on holiday and the other is on a training course and staying away in a hotel (and isn't responding to WhatsApp anyway). I don't know where she is. I don't know what to do for the best.

My Mum had a bad chest infection, and wouldn't go to the doctor's. My husband rang me at work to bully her into going into hospital. Her oxygen levels were really low, and she ended up spending Christmas there on an Aminophylline drip.
The only good thing was that it scared her into giving up smoking.

When I am your mum's age (sadly only a few years away) I think I would feel patronised if my DDs tried to drag me to the GP against my own better judgement.

It's more the OP's daughter that's the issue, though, isn't it? The issue isn't so much that the mum is ill, it's more that she is ill while looking after a nine-year-old. I wouldn't really want a kid to be looked after solely by someone with a wheezing chest infection who couldn't leave the house, to be honest. If the mum doesn't want to see the doctor that's fine, but it's not fine that her granddaughter is cooped up in the house with a sick woman (who might well be infectious for all we know).

Well I think it's nothing to do with OP's Mum's age.

When I had Pneumonia, aged 40, my Mum shot over to my house to help out. I couldn't breathe properly! Who wouldn;t come to help?

Of course OP shoudl go...the breathlessness she describes sounds a bit more than a normal cough.

My mum's 53 and just had pneumonia, she has been bloody ill. She rang me one evening gasping for air and coughing til she vomited so I took her straight to a&e where she was diagnosed. She had a quiet shadow on one lung that was barely getting oxygen!
You are doing the right thing op, safe journey and hope all gets sorted x

My young, fit and healthy DD soldiered on with a 'bit of a cough and cold' only to get pleurisy a couple of years ago. She has had a cold for a couple of days and woken up in real pain in the same area. Quick call to our doctor and I'm taking her to be checked. I'm all for home management of most things but sometimes a bit extra is needed. Hope your DM is okay.

Hope DM is ok. I imagine shes putting off aeeing a DR because she doesnt fancy spending Christmas in hospital.

Goodness what is wrong with me? I was all tears reading how everyone pulled together to look after your DD and get your mum to the doctors. Hope she's okay and you have a lovely Christmas.

I'm about half way there. Just stopped off to get a snack and a drink.

Another one here who now worries about parents as much as the DC.

Becareful on the road Socks and I hope all is well when you get there

Glad you're on your way - have you called her today? Let us know how you get on X

Drive safe, and do please let us know how everyone is later on.

Well done OP...not long now.x

Ok, I got there safely. Mum has antibiotics from the doctor and strict instructions to rest. Said it was flu plus a chest infection. One sister is home this evening and will check on her. Am about half way home with DD, who despite all the odds had a fab time with Granny! Despite being fed only soup as that's what she could manage. I did ask if she wanted to come back with us and got my head bitten off. We've got her to GP and got medication (which I made sure she actually had, not just the bit of paper) and I don't think I can push her into any more.

Bloody parents. Hoping she gets better quickly now.

You love your mum and your daughter, you needed to see them to sort things without relying on phone calls. Nothing wrong at all with any of that. Makes me warm and fuzzy. I am a fretter, fussy worrier. The world needs out kind

I wish your mum a speedy recovery

Best wishes for a speedy recovery for your mum and peace and quiet for you. It's tough when you have to start fussing at them.

I remember very well reaching that point with my mum years ago. I was driving and had to stop suddenly. As a reflex action I threw my arm out across her chest to 'hold her back'. She looked at me with a small smile and said "And now, the parent becomes the child, the child becomes the parent". So true. It happens to us all.

SocksRock for your Mum.

Glad to hear she's on the mend.

I am glad it all worked out for the best.

Glad your Mum was seen by the doctors OP. Hope the abs work and she's better real soon