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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To want to for goodness sakes kill them !!!!

69 replies

OopsDearyMe · 19/12/2016 14:42

A week ago DD2 and DS along for the ride, found some hidden Christmas presents and opened them. I found them and gave them a rocket, they were banned from all games and TV for a week and I thought that the message had gotten through.
I was pretty stunned tbh, I would never have expected them to be so blatant.
But this morning DS came into my bed complaining that his bed was cioverd in something sticky, when I went to look he was right, it had all this bright neon pink goo all over it, through the duvet cover and the duvet, sheet and mattress. Then I noticed a label, it WS whoopie putty. The very gift DS had under the tree, I then saw a present bow on the floor.
DS admitted straight away that DD2 and he had taken presents from under the tree and opened them, both were DS's as they had just grabbed a random couple.
I'm so upset that they would do this? How do I deal with it? My feeling is to take them all away, but its Christmas ffs.
Aibu to still allow them to have these, or what should I do?

Really need ideas, as I have no partner to bounce this off.

OP posts:

KERALA1 · 19/12/2016 16:02

I have never heard of people not putting presents under the tree so they wouldn't be opened in advance. Maybe understandable for tiny toddlers but 6 and 8 I would be horrified sorry

Kirriemuir · 19/12/2016 16:10

6 and 8 should know better. I'd be really upset. Punishment wise I don't know though.

We've had gifts under the tree since the tree went up 10 days ago. Previous years too and DS has never opened any of them. He knows to wait.

I do not agree with hiding them to avoid temptation. Both kids were told clearly not to touch. They are being defiant and I'd be cross.

MeetMeAtMidnight · 19/12/2016 16:11

I used to keep them hidden at work. Obviously that's not always possible. I think in this case, no treats or video games until Christmas Eve. The other presents you have to find a secure place to hide them. Do not let them have the ones they opened, you say they were both ds's so take something away from dd too and donate them to a children's toy drive. Make sure they know you are doing that. Do you have a suitcase you can lock the rest away in and put in a wardrobe or something?

Janey50 · 19/12/2016 16:14

I find it incredible that they repeated the 'crime',after being suitably punished for it the first time!

toptoe · 19/12/2016 16:16

Ah well they'll not have much to open christmas day now.

I think they've ruined it for themselves. You won't need to do much punishing. Just don't buy them anything else and stash some of their other presents away for next year, so they don't have masses to open still. That way they'll learn open now, don't get to open later. So when on xmas day they have only one or two left, you can say 'well, you opened all the others too early.'

They'll still get some from relatives I'm guessing so not cruel, just the way it is if you open your presents early.

DubiousCredentials · 19/12/2016 16:18

Presents go straight under the tree here and always have, even when dc were toddlers. They are 8 and 9 now. They've never opened any. I would be absolutely furious if at 6 and 8 they just helped themselves.

whatsagoodusername · 19/12/2016 16:24

I'd make them rewrap their own presents and probably tell them that was all they were getting if they didn't start behaving themselves.

londonrach · 19/12/2016 16:26

My sis has 5 and 8 year old both know not to open any presents. Thry always asked for food to since they can talk. Ok a 2-3 year old impuse but older than that naughty. Op youve done nothing wrong. Id remove the presents they opened and either give them away or better still earn them back with good behaviour. Not sure what id do about the remaining presents. Id let dc know im disappointed and sad. Dont replace the lost presents.

Jux · 19/12/2016 16:27

Not touching the presents is important early training. If you don't give them the chance to practise not giving in to temptation, when and how are they to learn?

Yes, they are easily old enough to know exactly what they're doing and how naughty they're being and they are pushing the boundaries. Give them a rocket, take away two more pocket-money type presents each and march the pair of them, with those presents, to the nearest charity/refuge/foodbank and make them donate them.

Bluntness100 · 19/12/2016 16:31

I wouldn't leave pressies under a tree either, but they were very naughty, particularly the 8 year old. So some form of punishment is in order. Be it no games or whatever they like between now and Xmas eve.

However I also wouldn't take away the pressies they opened and not give them them. I sometimes find the punishments suggested on mumsnet to be harsh and it makes me feel very sad for the kids of those posters. 😞

m0therofdragons · 19/12/2016 16:33

Wow I'd be fuming and upset. Dc are 8, 5 and 5 and all their gifts are wrapped and under the tree (apart from stocking gifts). They asked if they could open one, I said "not until Christmas Day" and they've accepted that. I think I'd remove/hide all gifts and say Christmas was cancelled and then sulk (I'm quite childish).

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 19/12/2016 16:33

I also wouldn't take away the pressies they opened and not give them them.

They should at least be taken away for now imo. They shouldn't yet have them.

Original poster

OopsDearyMe · 19/12/2016 16:56

Its definitely the older one leading the younger. I have removed all of the presents to my room. Told DD2 she is getting nothing more than these ones and our elf sent a 'Coal Warning' letter to both. I told DD2 that as the duvet was ruined and i will Ned to replace it, that this money comes off the presents I would have given her. Both have been banned from games and TV for a week and have been told that I will be giving them extra chores which I expect to be done without fuss.
The putty is of course defunct so just one gift I have said I will hand to charity shop. Should they open any more the rest will go too.
Maybe its a blessing in disguise that Father Christmas presents cannot be bought til Friday !!!

OP posts:

iogo · 19/12/2016 17:03

I'm genuinely surprised at the number of posters who have children that can't control themselves!

Our (non Santa) presents have always gone straight under the tree and neither of my two have ever stolen one to open. And they're by no means angelic kids either.

IThinkIMadeYouUpInsideMyHead · 19/12/2016 17:11

Gifts from Santa are hidden at DH's work until Christmas Eve but any presents we get before Christmas go under the tree. They always have. My DCs are no better than they ought to be but they have never so much as scratched a bit of tape off and I would be livid if they did!

I would take away any gifts they have already opened, permanently, with the threat of them all being taken away if it happens again. It's not cruel, they have to learn that their actions have consequences.

Original poster

OopsDearyMe · 19/12/2016 17:13

I don't either, they never thought to either, this his the bit that's bothering me the most.

OP posts:

Original poster

OopsDearyMe · 19/12/2016 17:21

I share my room at the moment with DS so his room is my room. They were to begin with in a cupboard on our top floor (town house) where they are not allowed. Second lot straight from tree whilst I was in the bath and they were 'meant' to be in bed.

OP posts:

Wookiecookies · 19/12/2016 17:23

I might be a horrible mother here, but being that in my opinion 8yrs old is quite old enough to know better. I would be inclined to wrap a load of empty boxes, put them under the tree to be opened on xmas day and make them think thats all they got, then on boxing day they could have the real presents. Thats probably the dark side of me coming out, but we have some presents out under the tree (not the ones that santa delivers of course ) and neither of mine dd16 and ds9 have ever done this as I think they know it would have been a terrible mistake with me! In fact my 9 yr old DS has just agreed with me about the above punishment and told me to tell the OP to do this!

He was shocked that the kids had done this!

Wookiecookies · 19/12/2016 17:26

Christmas is as much about the giver as it is the receiver imho OP and they need to be taught that they have spoilt the surprise for you too xxx

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